there was a cat that lived in the new york alley way, one day the cat
got killed by a oncoming vehichle, so the cat went to heaven, as the cat arrived to heaven, god had asked him, since you lived on the streets what can i give you in return, the cat said, i would like
to have a comfortable bed to sleep in, god granted his wish,
a few weeks later, about ten mice were killed in the same area
and were sent to heaven as they arrived, god asked them what can i give you in return living on the streets, the mice sayed we would like to have rollerblades, because were tired of running around,so
god granted there wishes,

a few months later god walked pass the cat and asked him, how is everything around here doing?

the cat replied, i just want to tell you god, thanks for giving me
meals on wheels.

WHY DID THE DUMB BLONDE CALL HER BOYFRIEND?

TO GET HIS NUMBER.

there was a man walking down the street near the city subway,
when all of a sudden a guy asked him for his cell phone, he replied
why do you whant my cell phone for, he says i need to dial 411, thats the operato's number, so i can find out how to dial 911.

hahahaha.

WHY DO GOLFER'S WERE TO PAIR'S OF PANTS?

IN CASE HE GETS A HOLE IN ONE, HAHAHAHAHAHA.

IT WAS A BRIGHT SATURDAY MORNING, JHONNY SAID TO HIS WIFE, HANNAH
HAVE YOU PACKED YOUR BAGS YET, OUR FLIGHT LEAVES IN A FEW HOURS WE HAVE TO GET TO THE AIRPORT ON TIME, QUICK HURRY UP LETS GO,
AS JHONNY AND HIS WIFE(HANNAH) APPROACH THE AIRPORT GATE WAY,
JHONNY NOTICES A BIG SIGN ON THE LEFT, IT SAID, (AIRPORT LEFT)
SO JHONNY TURNED AROUND AND TOOK HIS WIFE AND HIMSELF BACK HOME.

There was this old guy walking down the city sidewalk as he looked to the left he saw a mental patient in the hospital yard pulling a wheelbarrow upside down,so the old guy asked him how come you don't turn it over and push it, the mental man said, do you think i look stupid, if i turn it up the right way they would put materials in the wheelbarrow for me to push.