Love was seriously the most amazing experience of my life and when my heart was broken I felt lost. The relationship I was in lasted just a little longer than 3 years, she was a single mother when I met her, so when she left I lost a family.

It is a depressing story, but it's supposed to be. Life is full of emotional experiences and amazing opportunities, so I believe that I will find the silver lining. I have been on a few dates since the break up, but nothing has come of it because I either tune out or get obsessed with wanting to be in a relationship. So I am either completely uninterested and rude, or overinterested and desperate.

So I guess, what I want to know is how do you go back to being single? It's a different time in my life and I'm obviously not the same person I was when I started dating my ex.

Ahmad

i honestly wish i knew how to help you, but i am not a miricale worker...all i can honestly say...is cry...i know that when i got out of my 3 year relationship...i cried and cried..and i felt better...
if that doesn't work. get yourself out there. try new things. to take your mind off her.
i'm here if you ever need to talk.
let me know
Becca

Welcome to the posts!

The best way I can answer that is this-

You are single no matter what you do at this point.
Learn to enjoy who you are- and enjoy life while you are at it.
Sooner or latter the pain becomes a memory. During this time of
enjoying yourself- you may just find someone else to enjoy life with you. Good luck!

I guess that's the question. I was married for nine years before being single again. Although my ex and I are friends and talk every day...it is strange to be single again.

Only time will heal the wounds. I know that's a crappy thing to say...but it is true. After you have time to re-discover yourself...you'll be able to find the right relationship without being desperate or obsessed.

Papillon

Its a rough situation, I knew better than to get right back into a relationship to soon. You just have to take whatever
time is needed for yourself to get over it and make sure it IS
over.

Healing......very hard but it can be done. First thing to do is try to forgive!!! Forgive her and forgive yourself.....

First welcome to the site,and good first post.It's never easy 3 yrs 20 yrs.It will take time but you will heal and find your way again

Everyone has to find their own way of recovering from loss. Personally, I tend to spend a year on my own between boyfriends. I'm like Foghorn Leghorn and have to gather my feathers every now and then, and "fortunately, I say...I say...I keep my feathers numbered for just such an emergency."

I got out of 5 year relationship a little under a year ago.
It still hurts.
I have just recently been interested in seeing what else is out there in life again.
I am in no rush to date and what not, I am still healing.
I can only say to find who you are now and enjoy your life and see what you want out of life.
Crying is good if you have to. Heartache hurts and crying helps.
I still cry every now and then, but I am also laughing a lot more too.

Thank you, I guess my biggest problem is that I identified myself as a family man for nearly the entire time I was with her, I took her daughter in as my own.

Maybe if I let the whole story out (to complete strangers, none the less) that I maybe able to look at the situation in hindsight one day. So here goes.

Last year I planned an extremely romantic get away (cruise to the bahamas) it was at that time that I planned to ask her to marry me, the weeks leading up to that trip she seemed completely turned off and she seemed depressed. We went, and she treated me like a friend more than a lover, so I didn't propose. We got back to Chicago and everything got progressively worse, she started staying at work late (yeah, you know what's coming), she started staying out real late when she'd go out with her friends and by Dec. of last year I was more of a glorified live in babysitter than anything else. On Christmas Day, she told me she never loved me and that she tried to hold on because I treated her better than any man ever has, she left, took her child and moved. A few weeks later I got a call from her telling me that she had been seeing someone from work for the last 10 months and that she loved him.

THats a heartbreak in its rawest form, you just gotta go on. In time you will feel comfort with another.

Don't ever give up!
Dontcha wish you would have known ten months ago?
Sometimes we do know and try to ignore it the best we can.

I really don't, at least not at the beginning of those 10 months. I got to go scuba diving off of Cococay, got to take the child to her first day of school, helped pull out her first loose tooth. I have some great memories and I just have to figure out how to not lose site of them as memories and move on.

So instead of going and paying somebody all my hard earned money, i'll just come and vent on these forums, when i feel the need to

Dang...you make me laugh...