There was this elderly couple that lived on farm that raised cows and chickens. The old woman was cooking breakfast for herself and her husband when the old man decides to be an asshole. He walks up to her and says, "Baby, you see all those cows out there? If you can get milk out of this" (he grabs her boob), "I'll get rid of all those cows". She didn't say anything, but just kept cooking. The old man then says to her, "Baby, you see all those chickens out there? If you can get an egg out of this" (he grabs her between her legs), "I'll get rid of all those chickens." She said nothing, just turned the bacon over in the pan.

All of a sudden, she flipped her dish towel over her shoulder and grabs him between his legs and says, "If you ever get this hard, I'll get rid of your brother!"

Reminds of my family...lol...oh wait they may just shoot the dumb SOB

lol wow

"If you ever this hard, I'll get rid of you brother!"

-Uh, it was worded wrong, and I didnt' get it.

You are sick!!

I've heard this one before, but it still appeals to my deranged sense of humour.

it is only a joke hon

his wife was meaning that if he got as hard as his brother that she wouldnt be screwing his brother instead