I'm not wearing any pants.

Nice naval lint, sex?

hi, can i stick my finger up your butt?

It's for me!!!:

So ya wanta put your pickle in my juicy jar!!!

Nice job and if you can do this with your lips your hired

What's a big girl like you doing in a small town like this.

Your parents must be retards




cause you sure are special

Did you fart ?




cause you blow me away

The only time I'd kick you outta bed would be to **** you on the floor!

Hi, my name's ______. You better remember it cause you'll be screaming it later!!

I just **** my pants. Can I get into yours?

My love for you is like the sh!ts



I can't hold it in

Jessica, you need to find a different bar.

The ultimate sex pick up line:

Okay, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but I'm kind of concerned. I mean, we could hit it off really well, end up having a few drinks, next thing you know you're giving me your number because I'm too shy to ask for it, I finally get up the nerve to call and we take in a movie, have some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each other's friends, spend a lot of time together, then finally have get past this sexual tension and really develop this intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid and stable, so we move in together for a while, then a few months later get married, I get a promotion, you get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. You really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we have a kid anyway, only to find that I am resentful, the sparks start to fade and to rekindle them we have two more lovely kids, but now I work too much to keep up with the bills, have no time for you, you're stressed and stop taking really good care of yourself, so to get past our slow sex life and my declining self-confidence I turn to an outside affair for sexual gratification. You find out because I'm careless and a lousy liar, you throw me out (justifiably so) and we have to explain to the kids why mommy and daddy are splitting up. That's just too sad. Think about the children! For God's sake, if you dance with me and we hit it off, let's just keep it sexual, because we both know where it's going.

???What do you mean???

my d!ck is 8ft long, but 1/4 inch wide

I like to snatch kisses and vice versa!

Well, on second thought, the one you heard these lines in must be a gold mine.

Hey, I just realized, your from Traverse City, I'm from Mio

You poor thing.