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| Topic: Advice/Insight from Guys | |
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MARRIED!!!
Some other clues for the unintiated If they don't wanna give their phone#...they're married, or living with someone. If you can't nail them down to a time to meet, they're involved I've seen way too many people on-line looking for that something that they are supposedly missing at home. |
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If they are local to you and not too much planning involved I'd say cut the correspondence time way down. And just go for it. been there, done that - huge waste of my time. And how is spending a month or two of corresponding only to have nothing to show for it, not a waste of your time????  I'm no genius but it seems to me that wasting a week is better than wasting two months, no???? Or am I missing something?? no - but corresponding online is easy..I am at my computer anyway..I don't have to put aside a time,get dressed, drive somewhere only to meet someone who has no real interest in getting to know me. I can do this in my jammies; during my lunch break; while dinner is cooking, etc. I don't have to make a big production to write an email. It takes me a long time to figure out if someone is worth my time..I have to talk about a lot of different things over a long period of time. That's just me. EVeryone is different. But whenever I have run into these guys that can't be bothered talking via e-mail for any length of time and want to meet right away, they were basically looking for a hit and run. I am not about that. |
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It's hard for me to grasp the thrill of corresponding with someone (just chit-chat, no explicit stuff) for so long and then bailing when the prospect of talking/meeting comes up.
I guess there's all kinds... |
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If they are local to you and not too much planning involved I'd say cut the correspondence time way down. And just go for it. been there, done that - huge waste of my time. And how is spending a month or two of corresponding only to have nothing to show for it, not a waste of your time???? I'm no genius but it seems to me that wasting a week is better than wasting two months, no???? Or am I missing something?? no - but corresponding online is easy..I am at my computer anyway..I don't have to put aside a time,get dressed, drive somewhere only to meet someone who has no real interest in getting to know me. I can do this in my jammies; during my lunch break; while dinner is cooking, etc. I don't have to make a big production to write an email. It takes me a long time to figure out if someone is worth my time..I have to talk about a lot of different things over a long period of time. That's just me. EVeryone is different. But whenever I have run into these guys that can't be bothered talking via e-mail for any length of time and want to meet right away, they were basically looking for a hit and run. I am not about that. There are those who would say you can get to know each other better in the real world... I understand your experiences have been less than satisfying, but they are after all your experiences. Living life in your jammies is certainly your decision to make, but I for one would rather look someone in the eyes and see what's going on with them. JMO |
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If they are local to you and not too much planning involved I'd say cut the correspondence time way down. And just go for it. been there, done that - huge waste of my time. And how is spending a month or two of corresponding only to have nothing to show for it, not a waste of your time???? I'm no genius but it seems to me that wasting a week is better than wasting two months, no???? Or am I missing something?? no - but corresponding online is easy..I am at my computer anyway..I don't have to put aside a time,get dressed, drive somewhere only to meet someone who has no real interest in getting to know me. I can do this in my jammies; during my lunch break; while dinner is cooking, etc. I don't have to make a big production to write an email. It takes me a long time to figure out if someone is worth my time..I have to talk about a lot of different things over a long period of time. That's just me. EVeryone is different. But whenever I have run into these guys that can't be bothered talking via e-mail for any length of time and want to meet right away, they were basically looking for a hit and run. I am not about that. There are those who would say you can get to know each other better in the real world... I understand your experiences have been less than satisfying, but they are after all your experiences. Living life in your jammies is certainly your decision to make, but I for one would rather look someone in the eyes and see what's going on with them. JMO yep, like I said, we are all different. I don't live life in my jammies - I have very little free time..I work two jobs, I'm a single mom, and I am a graduate student. So I am very stingy about parceling out my free time. Someone kind of has to prove that they are worth it. |
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If they are local to you and not too much planning involved I'd say cut the correspondence time way down. And just go for it. been there, done that - huge waste of my time. And how is spending a month or two of corresponding only to have nothing to show for it, not a waste of your time???? I'm no genius but it seems to me that wasting a week is better than wasting two months, no???? Or am I missing something?? no - but corresponding online is easy..I am at my computer anyway..I don't have to put aside a time,get dressed, drive somewhere only to meet someone who has no real interest in getting to know me. I can do this in my jammies; during my lunch break; while dinner is cooking, etc. I don't have to make a big production to write an email. It takes me a long time to figure out if someone is worth my time..I have to talk about a lot of different things over a long period of time. That's just me. EVeryone is different. But whenever I have run into these guys that can't be bothered talking via e-mail for any length of time and want to meet right away, they were basically looking for a hit and run. I am not about that. There are those who would say you can get to know each other better in the real world... I understand your experiences have been less than satisfying, but they are after all your experiences. Living life in your jammies is certainly your decision to make, but I for one would rather look someone in the eyes and see what's going on with them. JMO yep, like I said, we are all different. I don't live life in my jammies - I have very little free time..I work two jobs, I'm a single mom, and I am a graduate student. So I am very stingy about parceling out my free time. Someone kind of has to prove that they are worth it. A reasonable approach. as you say, we are all different 
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If they are local to you and not too much planning involved I'd say cut the correspondence time way down. And just go for it. been there, done that - huge waste of my time. And how is spending a month or two of corresponding only to have nothing to show for it, not a waste of your time???? I'm no genius but it seems to me that wasting a week is better than wasting two months, no???? Or am I missing something?? no - but corresponding online is easy..I am at my computer anyway..I don't have to put aside a time,get dressed, drive somewhere only to meet someone who has no real interest in getting to know me. I can do this in my jammies; during my lunch break; while dinner is cooking, etc. I don't have to make a big production to write an email. It takes me a long time to figure out if someone is worth my time..I have to talk about a lot of different things over a long period of time. That's just me. EVeryone is different. But whenever I have run into these guys that can't be bothered talking via e-mail for any length of time and want to meet right away, they were basically looking for a hit and run. I am not about that. There are those who would say you can get to know each other better in the real world... I understand your experiences have been less than satisfying, but they are after all your experiences. Living life in your jammies is certainly your decision to make, but I for one would rather look someone in the eyes and see what's going on with them. JMO yep, like I said, we are all different. I don't live life in my jammies - I have very little free time..I work two jobs, I'm a single mom, and I am a graduate student. So I am very stingy about parceling out my free time. Someone kind of has to prove that they are worth it. A reasonable approach. as you say, we are all different I think if I had more free time, I would be more willing to spend it ..but right now, they get squeezed into my email box until they are worthy...  I like talking to you..you can disagree without getting nasty. 
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I've been "talking" to some matches thru email (this site and other paid one). After corresponding for some time (1-2 months) when I broach the topic of talking or meeting, the communication comes to an abrupt halt. Why? Does this imply too much of a commitment? If we were to have met in person in the first place we may have already exchanged phone numbers or arranged another date. Is there some unwritten rule I violate when asking for a more personal sort of contact? I also have issues with topic. I probably wouldn't, so much, if I didn't enjoy the forums and be exposed to a national membership like this site has, well...world wide, really...I guess...is it? Anyways, my concerns about meeting people who live far away have to do with questions like ,What if we meet each other, hit it off, decide to keep talking as if we're going to do something drastic, like relocating away from family, friends & work and do all that without really having had the chance to ever know that person casually, without major life changes involved. I'm still trying to reconcile all this before I dissapoint someone, or visa versa... 
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I've been "talking" to some matches thru email (this site and other paid one). After corresponding for some time (1-2 months) when I broach the topic of talking or meeting, the communication comes to an abrupt halt. Why? Does this imply too much of a commitment? If we were to have met in person in the first place we may have already exchanged phone numbers or arranged another date. Is there some unwritten rule I violate when asking for a more personal sort of contact? I also have issues with topic. I probably wouldn't, so much, if I didn't enjoy the forums and be exposed to a national membership like this site has, well...world wide, really...I guess...is it? Anyways, my concerns about meeting people who live far away have to do with questions like ,What if we meet each other, hit it off, decide to keep talking as if we're going to do something drastic, like relocating away from family, friends & work and do all that without really having had the chance to ever know that person casually, without major life changes involved. I'm still trying to reconcile all this before I dissapoint someone, or visa versa...
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I've been "talking" to some matches thru email (this site and other paid one). After corresponding for some time (1-2 months) when I broach the topic of talking or meeting, the communication comes to an abrupt halt. Why? Does this imply too much of a commitment? If we were to have met in person in the first place we may have already exchanged phone numbers or arranged another date. Is there some unwritten rule I violate when asking for a more personal sort of contact? I also have issues with topic. I probably wouldn't, so much, if I didn't enjoy the forums and be exposed to a national membership like this site has, well...world wide, really...I guess...is it? Anyways, my concerns about meeting people who live far away have to do with questions like ,What if we meet each other, hit it off, decide to keep talking as if we're going to do something drastic, like relocating away from family, friends & work and do all that without really having had the chance to ever know that person casually, without major life changes involved. I'm still trying to reconcile all this before I dissapoint someone, or visa versa... That seems alot harder to accomplish than to say "Go for it but don't be stupid"
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I've been "talking" to some matches thru email (this site and other paid one). After corresponding for some time (1-2 months) when I broach the topic of talking or meeting, the communication comes to an abrupt halt. Why? Does this imply too much of a commitment? If we were to have met in person in the first place we may have already exchanged phone numbers or arranged another date. Is there some unwritten rule I violate when asking for a more personal sort of contact? I also have issues with topic. I probably wouldn't, so much, if I didn't enjoy the forums and be exposed to a national membership like this site has, well...world wide, really...I guess...is it? Anyways, my concerns about meeting people who live far away have to do with questions like ,What if we meet each other, hit it off, decide to keep talking as if we're going to do something drastic, like relocating away from family, friends & work and do all that without really having had the chance to ever know that person casually, without major life changes involved. I'm still trying to reconcile all this before I dissapoint someone, or visa versa... if I lived close enough I would meet them for sure  and for gypsy i would travel the 2000 or whatever miles to meet her  
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Well be smart about it.....weigh the pros and cons....why are you worrying about a what if???? Is there someone you are interested in??? Is she far away???? Do the normal thing and meet and see what happens......if you like each other alot then do the long distance thing for awhile and then if you cant live without each other then one of you move.....
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I've been "talking" to some matches thru email (this site and other paid one). After corresponding for some time (1-2 months) when I broach the topic of talking or meeting, the communication comes to an abrupt halt. Why? Does this imply too much of a commitment? If we were to have met in person in the first place we may have already exchanged phone numbers or arranged another date. Is there some unwritten rule I violate when asking for a more personal sort of contact? I also have issues with topic. I probably wouldn't, so much, if I didn't enjoy the forums and be exposed to a national membership like this site has, well...world wide, really...I guess...is it? Anyways, my concerns about meeting people who live far away have to do with questions like ,What if we meet each other, hit it off, decide to keep talking as if we're going to do something drastic, like relocating away from family, friends & work and do all that without really having had the chance to ever know that person casually, without major life changes involved. I'm still trying to reconcile all this before I dissapoint someone, or visa versa... if I lived close enough I would meet them for sure and for gypsy i would travel the 2000 or whatever miles to meet her
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thats really sweet of you shazzam!!!
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thats really sweet of you shazzam!!! you werent supposed to see that 
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Edited by
Gypsy41
on
Thu 02/28/08 09:39 PM
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<------sees all!!!
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Yeah..I agree... Gypsy's a doll
 ...she went STRAIGHT to my favorites list...no questions asked...lol 
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Yeah..I agree... Gypsy's a doll ...she went STRAIGHT to my favorites list...no questions asked...lol
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I LOVE B.C. ! One of my very favorite places on the planet.
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