Find away to turn it off. It's not easy I know...

Never listen to someone that tells you that your thinking to much. You should never stop thinking. Ever.

I never, never, said to stop thinking....

When you tell someone that their thinking too much then your basically telling them to stop thinking.

So in truth you did.

See! See! I gotta hot cute little butt! Never mind the fact that its getting arrested that's besides the point! Oh wait! Wrong thread! Sowee!

You just meant that I should stop over-analyzing. But okay, are bad previous relationships "baggage" necessarily? I don't talk to the guys anymore, I don't have kids because of them, or anything like that. And I've always been incredibly socially anxious, but I think it's more pronounced with someone in whom I'm interested... So I need to figure out how to deal with this, both internally and with the guy it is that I like.

I disagree. I myself think too much. I can't help it, but it does get in the way. It cause anxiety, depression, etc. Thinking too much is never a good thing.

Thank you for understanding what I was trying to say.

One, have confidence in yourself. Its OK for people to like you, because it can happen. The other, look at the people in the relationships you've had, was this a case of people you were trying to "rescue"?

Thinking too much is bad if you can't shut it off. I know what you're talking about.

Over-analyzing isn't always a bad thing, it keeps you ready for anything that can happen.

Look everyone can sit here and give you advise on what to do or how to do it, or what to tell yourself, or not to think. But the truth of the matter is, the only way you can get past this is to identify that you have this issue, (You have), then don't let yourself do it. You just have to reach down, face the scary stuff and just don't let yourself run away untill you have a real reason to.

It takes time but you'll get past this. you ust have to push yourself to that point. your the only one that can make you do it. All the advise in the world won't do anything for you. You have to do it.

I was probably trying to rescue some of them (definitely one... god that was awful.. codependent.. all sorts of bad news bears). The last few have seemed to totally have things together, though.

Now is where you do need to think...

Ask yourself, what happened? Did you push them away? Did it not click? Sometimes we sabotage ourselves, sometimes its just not meant to be.

I know I have to do this by myself. Which sucks! I want someone to say, "do this and you will get better". Like taking antibiotics. Ugh!!!!!

I wish it was that easy. The only thing others can do is try to point you in the right direction, you have to do the rest.

Well, I all but threw myself at one guy, and he would never acknowledge that anything was going on (though things were, but that's a long and crazy story). And then I acted like an idiot with the last guy I dated, and all he wanted me for was a friend with benefits. But I was kinda interested in this guy at work, and as soon as I found out he was also interested in me, I lost all interest and treat him totally differently (we're still friends, but I have no interest anymore). And then this other guy! He started saying things that indicated he liked me, and it shut me down. Why can't I be somewhere in the middle?!

Well, I all but threw myself at one guy, and he would never acknowledge that anything was going on (though things were, but that's a long and crazy story).

And if thing would have gotten more serious, you would have run away.

And then I acted like an idiot with the last guy I dated, and all he wanted me for was a friend with benefits.

No committment, he was safe.

But I was kinda interested in this guy at work, and as soon as I found out he was also interested in me, I lost all interest and treat him totally differently (we're still friends, but I have no interest anymore). And then this other guy! He started saying things that indicated he liked me, and it shut me down. Why can't I be somewhere in the middle?!

Am I seeing a trend here??

As long as a guy shows no intrest in committment, you are intrested. But as soon as he shows intrest, you shut down.

Are you afraid of committment?

Consciously, no. I would actually really like to have a committed relationship. If I can find the person that isn't going to hurt me, I have alot of love to give.

And you are not going to know that until you try.

I know. I know! I know. This is all so overwhelming!

Chill m'lady. It'll be alright. Just figure who and what you are wanting and when you find it, don't run away.