Well I was already making the plans of wanting to move more east.

of course whats inside that counts...but i still like to see who i am communicating with...now come on girls would you set up a date without knowing what he looks like first...anyways my pet peeve is these people that post pics that are older than my adult children...yes i just encountered a very nice man who showed up at my door and looked nothing like his pic...and he was actually driving a vehicle that looked like it came from wille wonka land...sorry i need a pic!

But don't you need a pic first???

I understand what you are saying, but also you said that the pics are not always acurate, so at least I am not lying. I will show MY pic, but only when I want. And that is definately not after one email!

Probably Link!!!!! Just don't ask in the first one!!! That is a no-no!!!

The whole pic no pic is a very personal choice.

First people need to keep in mind a picture is not worth a thousand words. It is a split-second moment in time. They often are selected because they are flattering, least we hope so though many I see are really posters own worst choice, but no one's appearance is constant. Very few people make every photo a billboard to tell you a story about them. Many don't have the time to go out and be professionally photographed each year even though I recommend it as a huge gift to yourself and the people who care about you.

Since most of you could not tell a person's height or weight with in 6" or 50 lbs. even with a photo, if your life depended on it, choices depending really restrictive boundries are cutting your own throat and often your best hope of meeting a great person. Someone who doesn't pan out to be what they represent is no fun but before you get your heart out there Verify. The really good folks will have references.

For some people there is a smart reason not to put a photo up. It can actually put your life on the line posting photo's where you can draw people who would just love to slip into your personal life and do you harm because you made them play by society's laws. People should not be harrassed for being careful; especially if they have a good reason. Kids or dependent seniors in residence is an excellent one. As a social worker I guarantee you not nice people are surfing these sites daily. Be smart.

Last I heard privacy is a basic tenant of our Constitution and this site does NOT require anyone to post a photo.

Sadly not posting a picture is often going to make good people fear you. They think names are easy to change but you are stuck with your face and history. Lot of married people or the ones who pretend to be to get the perks and are looking to "buy up" or "out" of their choices are very common. But so are their significant other's who sadly catch them doing exactly this and plan a certain kind of Karma that seems kind of fair...lol.

For those who send two or more "demand" emails you can kind of figure they are just over grown juvinile's that see getting a picture as a challenge. Some will talk until they are blew in the face, complimentary as Christmas but when they finally get a photo they pass it around and disappear like a moth's in a flame.

The reality is most people feel if they have to put themselves out there, which most of us find pretty un-nerveing because there are always men and women who are decidedly cruel (unfortuneately some High school junk still hangs around in the so called grown up world) others have too also but they have the CHOICE not to respond weather it is to your profile or posts. In more cases than people think that would be a missed opportunity.

A lot of good people are just shy which in other languages is often synomous to wise. What a concept...lol.

Fortuneately stupid and rude is annoyeing and painfully obvious so when people do it try to see it as a permission to do what is so your total right to do IGNORE THEM!!! There is an old saying "There is no punishment like silence for a fool." It just "kills them with kindness". I hate bullies but some battles you just don't have to fight by the grace of being nice. Youth and strength sometimes make that easy to overlook in our current culture of get off your butt and speak up for yourself.

Venting is not a bad thing if you don't over do it. Sometimes doing something nice for someone else is just as effective. Hugs...Joy



Might be a genuine professional reason. for a lot of women it really is just trying to avoid the inevitable

It's apparent that your looking for friendship, it states it on your profile. If you were looking to date then a picture may suit more. Considering your looking for friends these guys looking for pics should respect that and leave it alone. Chemistry/attraction only applies in dating and relationships. Not friendships...Do your thing Ella!