Topic: DIET RULES FOR CHEATERS
uk1971's photo
Mon 01/21/08 03:44 PM
Edited by uk1971 on Mon 01/21/08 03:45 PM
1. If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.

2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are canceled out by the diet soda.

3. When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if you don't eat more than they do.

4. Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER count, such as hot chocolate, brandy, toast and Sara Lee Cheesecake.

5. If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.

6. Movie related foods (Milk Duds, Buttered Popcorn, Junior Mints, Red Hots, Tootsie Rolls, etc.) do not have additional calories because they are part of the entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel.

7. Cookie pieces contain no fat--the process of breaking causes fat leakage.

8. Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you are in the process of preparing something. Examples are peanut butter on a knife making a sandwich and ice cream on a spoon making a sundae.

9. Foods that have the same colour have the same number of calories. Examples are: spinach and pistachio ice cream; mushrooms and white chocolate. NOTE: Chocolate is a universal color and may be substituted for any other food color.

10. Foods that are frozen have no calories because calories are units of heat. Examples are ice cream, frozen pies, and Popsicles.

bigsmile glasses

bgeorge's photo
Mon 01/21/08 03:47 PM
thanks for the pointers...stringbeanlaugh noway laugh

Moondark's photo
Mon 01/21/08 03:47 PM
Gee, if only that really worked.

deltasissy's photo
Mon 01/21/08 03:52 PM
hee haw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

drinker