im fighting a battle within myself
anger and hatred trying to get out
every decision i make, its the wrong choice
when i have something to say, i seem to have no voice

why cant you understand, why is it so unclear
why cant i figure out, what it is i fear
my head spins with tormented and twisted ideas
why cant you understand what it is that i feel

laying in bed, cant sleep at all
trying to think of ways to tear down these walls
this depression is consuming my everyday life
im tired of the marks that are left when i cut myself with this knife

its my only release, it takes away the pain
makes me feel free, but then i feel insane
the droplets of blood feel like ive acomplished something great
sometimes wonder if i cut to deep what will be my fate

its my little secret, it gives me a sense of power
minute by minute, hour by hour
just waiting for a chance to be all alone
to get my release, ill cut to the bone

i hate the fact that it controls me the way that it does
but sometimes it feels like an act of love
its crazy i know to need to feel this escape
id love to stop, but dont know what it will take

wish i was normal, and could just punch a wall
but the emotions inside rise and they fall
it feels natural to just grab the blade
with a quick slash it all starts to fade

the release is great, the blood so red
but knowing it only last for a few days
that what i dread



*this isnt about me...just something i wrote about a patient of mine who suffers from this...it affected me, and this is my release*

JESUS!! that was like reading Stephen King novel.

been there

JUST HORRIBLE.......

That was too freaking deep for a Monday night Hun.

It has meaning

crap..guess i should have saved it for tuesday right? lol

Actually I have read it twice now,,,wow

Such a sad thing for some to go thru ...Well written Noel

wow, your like Edgar Allan Poe, no wonder your single.

It's tough. I know what you're going through.

You're just a sweet talker arent you?

sucessful, rich, and wordly known????..hell, thanks for the compliment...

Your welcome.

I would date you beautiful, I don't care if you are smarter them me, that just means I would let you take of the check book hahahahahaha :-)

i do not need to tell you, do i?

"i like that"

Sad but realistic
People do have their own way of dealing with things
I have seen this in a friend and it is hard to watch

Good write