As I lay here all alone,
Staring at the bright blue moon,
I feel a little tug upon my heart.
Fate has once again pulled us apart.

Over the years your love for me
Touched my very soul
For all to see...
Yet it wasn't meant to be.

You had your life, I had mine,
But when they came together
There was a new world to discover:
A place for you and me-
Your arms around me,
Your touch upon me,
A time for us to be...
Paradise.

Between these times we yearned for the next.
Our love never wavered, even put to the test
Of me with another
And you with yours
It never did matter
Our emotions stayed pure
There were always the dreams
For when we were together, and would be...
For Always.

Yet you couldn't take it,
You retreated,
You hid
In a world full of lies, that I couldn't fit in.
I watched as you faded
Away from our place.
I cried and I raged
At the loss shown on your face.

As I began to have faith once more,
That you would come back to your head,
Your mother came through your bedroom door
To find you dead on your bed.
My Ben,
As I lay here, my heart shatters.
My teardrops, like rain,
They splatter
On what was once my soul.

I failed.
I love you, Ben



Thursday, March 23rd, 1995.

wow .. deep pain

((((((((LULU)))))))

you didn't fail, your a survivor. You did what you could do, but no one could give the hope, the life, the love of living to another. That must come from within yourself.

amen

Oh wow Lulu...that was really heart tugging. I'm choked up not knowing what to say, but that was good expression in your poem.

I had a tragedy in my life also and learned to remember but get past it. It was so sad to hear and brought back memories.

i wrote that the night before his service...a very dark time for me.