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| Topic: How does this work!!???? | |
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Well, let me see......I am here on Long Island NY and Jon, TheCaptain is in Idaho, close to the Oregon border. There is 2,559 miles between us and we have been making things work for the past seven months. It takes a lot of phone calls, text messaging, e-mails, letters and time spent on IMing each other but it can work. If you both are as taken with each other as you say, let things progress at their own time, when it feels right arrange a visit, don't just jump to it now because things are still so new. We consider our phone calls and our time on the web cam to be our "dates" and when we have met in person----those are our "special times"  and I am planning on selling my house this summer and moving to be with him.
Thanks for that! Its encouraging to know there can be success in a lond distance relationship...give me some hope at least! 
Good luck with you new-found special someone!! 
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Catch Tiger in the "coffee shop" during the day.
He is on at work, don't think they have a home puter. |
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I tried a long distance "getting to know you." I went to a job interview in Flagstaff, Arizona and met someone who also had all my core values. We spent the weekend together, went to the Grand Canyon, Sedona and the sparks were flying! I thought he was perfect. We communicated every other day once I returned. Then about 2 weeks later I saw a different side. He raised his voice to me, judged me and put me down. I thought he was everything too. As a friend of mine says, "You are only meeting their representative for the first few months." Get to know her before you get your hopes up. At least see how she reacts to uncomfortable situations/ conversations. By the way, very nice profile - I like the puppy pics! yes, thank you for that advise. I guess i am just all excited right now, simply because its been so long jst to find this 'core" match. I know its not everything, but for me I am at least back at the starting blocks and have something to really work with.
So that in itself is amazing for me. So I will continue to check for advice here and see where this goes. It's exciting and scary all rolled into one. Wow, does that ever change???  
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Catch Tiger in the "coffee shop" during the day. He is on at work, don't think they have a home puter. OK thanks Oldsage! Aprreciate the direction!
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No, it never changes... It is always exciting and scary when you are first seeing a connection...
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I feel as if I have some expertise to bring to this table. Listen to my story. It's fantastical, but it's also true and may help you.
In August of 2006, I began posting on some popular discussion boards on Facebook. I became really addicted like many people and would be posting day and night. After a few days, I noticed I was responding a lot to a girl named Kelly from Missouri. She must have noticed this too, because we began talking in personal messages through Facebook outside the board. Within a few messages we had traded AIM s/n's, and were talking deep into the night. Until 4 or 5 in the morning for weeks, we were talking on AIM, learning about each other, finding we had quite a few things in common. After a short time... only about a month, we mutually decided we wanted to meet... despite her being in Missouri, me in Georgia, a 649 mile distance seperating us. But my resolve was final. I wanted to meet this girl that attracted me like I had never been attracted before. I haphazardly planned a 3 day stay with her, which required a 16 hour drive straight to and from Springfield, Missouri. Things went great, and when I got back to Georgia, I called her and asked if she wanted to be my girlfriend. For 10 months, we talked on the phone and on AIM, seeing each other once every two or three months for a week, possibly two at a time. She was the best thing that ever happened to me. In fact, in the last few months of the relationship, I had been planning a proposal. And even though our life and love together was perfect... the distance finally tore us apart. I did the dirty deed of the break up... it was the hardest decision of my life... and it was painful for us both, and to this day, almost 4 months after the break, I wonder if I ended something that was meant to be... Basically, my advice to you is this: Be careful what you get into, because the chances of having the perfect relationship are great, but the risks of ending up with a broken heart are greater. |
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Edited by
Sumthingdifferent
on
Thu 01/03/08 10:20 AM
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I feel as if I have some expertise to bring to this table. Listen to my story. It's fantastical, but it's also true and may help you. In August of 2006, I began posting on some popular discussion boards on Facebook. I became really addicted like many people and would be posting day and night. After a few days, I noticed I was responding a lot to a girl named Kelly from Missouri. She must have noticed this too, because we began talking in personal messages through Facebook outside the board. Within a few messages we had traded AIM s/n's, and were talking deep into the night. Until 4 or 5 in the morning for weeks, we were talking on AIM, learning about each other, finding we had quite a few things in common. After a short time... only about a month, we mutually decided we wanted to meet... despite her being in Missouri, me in Georgia, a 649 mile distance seperating us. But my resolve was final. I wanted to meet this girl that attracted me like I had never been attracted before. I haphazardly planned a 3 day stay with her, which required a 16 hour drive straight to and from Springfield, Missouri. Things went great, and when I got back to Georgia, I called her and asked if she wanted to be my girlfriend. For 10 months, we talked on the phone and on AIM, seeing each other once every two or three months for a week, possibly two at a time. She was the best thing that ever happened to me. In fact, in the last few months of the relationship, I had been planning a proposal. And even though our life and love together was perfect... the distance finally tore us apart. I did the dirty deed of the break up... it was the hardest decision of my life... and it was painful for us both, and to this day, almost 4 months after the break, I wonder if I ended something that was meant to be... Basically, my advice to you is this: Be careful what you get into, because the chances of having the perfect relationship are great, but the risks of ending up with a broken heart are greater. Wow! Sorry your's ended. And thanks very much for your story..it definitely plays a role! And that is what I am afraid of. The chemestry we already have is rare, because certain traits we share, we have never found in another person...so we can truly "relate" to each other and understand each other on levels no one else in our lives could. So thats the HUGE attraction for both of us right now. But having tried the long distance thing (ours right now would be around 1,400 miles) is the BIG problem for me. I'm stuck at the moment in a BIG work project, and she has a 12 year old son, who has all his friends and such there, so I don't want to up-root him from that, because I know how important that kind of "stability" is for a child growing up. So I'm faced with knowing the "long distance" part really SUCKS. But then have found chemestry on levels that I have never experienced before and I know are extremely rare, so I don't want to let that go! And this was TOTALLY unexpected on top of it all! She just jokingly e-mailed me from a "joking" post I made...we started chatting and then BOOM!!!  What just hit me!!?? But in a GOOD way!
Now I will just talk with her more..explore more..take things slow and if things continue to go well, TRY to figure SOMETHING out of where to go from there. This is NEW TERRITORY for me and I am kinda like a lost puppy at the moment.
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Well, that's just the thing. If you want to make it work, you can. It will be hard, but never once did I feel like that year of my life wasn't worth the trouble. Money for plane tickets and the like was really a small price to pay to feel like I never have before.
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I don't do LDRs.
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Well, that's just the thing. If you want to make it work, you can. It will be hard, but never once did I feel like that year of my life wasn't worth the trouble. Money for plane tickets and the like was really a small price to pay to feel like I never have before. Maybe you should try to rekindle (sp?) that relationship??? |
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I don't do LDRs. That WAS my thinking for a LONG time...this one caught me very off guard! |
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the time honored method is email, phone, cam, cam, cam.....then meet, disillusionment and resignation then email, phone....
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the time honored method is email, phone, cam, cam, cam.....then meet, disillusionment and resignation then email, phone....
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