widowed 2 years now, trying this for the first time. People ok with dating a widow or not? Wondering how people see this. thanks

Aren't you a.... widower?

I've only dated a widow one time, for a couple of years. It was unusual for me and I don't know if things went that well. Good luck with your dating.

I'd be the first person to say that I can never remember the difference of a widow and widower. I dated a man whose wife died 10 years earlier, so that should clear things up.

I don't see why it would bother anyone, unless you were still grieving?

I do see a potential problem with finding a woman to date given your profile isn't complete and your profile picture is you standing in front of a bed... bedroom and bathroom photos are off putting to most women.

Other than that I believe the main concern would be if you were still grieving.
Best of luck to you.

As long as you were not the cause of the death, I don't see why a woman would have an issue.


If you were the cause, then ya they might have an issue...




And like Owl says, you are a widower not a widow if you are male...

I could see it as a problem if you are comparing your date to your wife.

I think you have to reach the stage in healing where you stop wanting to talk about them all the time, for it to be fair on the new person.
I personally would prefer a widower, because they understand your grief, the respect you want shown for your past spouse.
It is not your fault they died, so why would anyone hold it against you?

Excellent life experience said here. Heartfelt and well said....

I wish I had it said to me years ago.

Yes we can give it a try , not fun being alone sometimes

sorry to know

I have seeing u here from long.hope u will find good friends here

Awwww you are so sweet you just said it allGod bless you right now am still having the grief that I lost my woman 4 years ago but I thank God I can watch over our daughter and also my grand kid thanks

This forum is the best place to share your griefs and let enlighten each other For a better tomorrow am sure we all have witnessed one of two things that really makes things harder and can’t get over it then it’s cause depressions right now am still having that thought are there better ones who could be like my late wife thanks

I have never dated a widow ... it would be hard if they are still grieving...and can not stop talking about her or him ... same goes for any new relationship ... if they are just trying to find the same kind of person to feel their shoes ... that will never work out ...

There is nothing wrong with seeing a grief therapist or joining some grief groups.
It helps to talk.

Thing is, someone who lost their spouse didn't choose to leave that person, so they likely still loved them when they passed away.
Someone who's divorced is different, that relationship fell apart.

What you tend to get with a widower that I know from someone very close to me who gave widowers the benefit of the doubt:
- their house is full up with pictures of their passed wife
- things in the home have to remain exactly the same as she did it/wanted it
- they talk about it when they're reminded of something
- they compare you, even if not vocalized, and living up to a diseased 'saint' isn't easy
- they still love the diseased spouse and that won't ever go away. She's forever on a pedestal

And so on and so forth.

Is it a problem? It is for me. I will NEVER date and/or get involved with a widower.
I want to find my Soulmate to whom I am the love of his life. This isn't possible with a widower, and I ain't gonna play second fiddle.

Every one is different. I have lost two husband's, that I was very much in love with.
I do not have one picture hanging of either men.
Nor is their 'personal things' around the house.
I never compared one husband with the other. They were as different as chalk and cheese.
Some people want to live in the here and now and not in the past, sure memories pop up, but they are personal and you don't want to share or bother anyone. So you keep it close to your heart, where it should be.
Men and women are actually capable of loving more than one or two people in their lifetime and having more than one or two 'soulmates'.
I personally think 'best friend is a truer word.

I get that and I agree. But if you pay attention to people, even here in the forums, you can tell that usually women can deal with loss much better than men.
There are of course exceptions, but I'm not talking about exceptions.
Women are naturally more in touch with feelings and emotions and the aspect of life, death, birth, birthing pains, going with the flow etc. These are all aspects of the feminine. I think that's why we can move on after either loss or breakup much better.
Men are more inclined to remain stuck, even 12-20 years after a divorce, let alone losing their wife and becoming a widower.
Thinking of all the friends I've had and have I cannot think of 1 woman who was/is still stuck after a long term relationship fell apart. I do know men like that though.
Men and women are generally really quite different in these matter.

Hey