For once in a lifetime,we all do experienced falling in love genuinely with someone,that we even thought of creating a life and decided to spend the rest of the future with "the one".

And then,reality check came in.

Suddenly,the used to be an intense romance turns into sour.

What's probably the lucid reason on why you'd rather decided to turn your back,rather than to hold on to stay even if you knew,it'll rubbed out your feelings enormously?

I don't agree with the premise so I have no answer.

Maybe I was in love with the ex wife at some stage. But coming home just to see my cats, being glad to go to work? Sleeping in different bedrooms? No more warnings signs required, I guess.

Exactly the same situation for me as Lars except with lots of yelling (not me doing it)

When I finally accepted that I couldn't change the situation and it seriously affected my emotional and physical health.

My moron ex (back in thre 80's)....he turned out to be a serial cheater, and wanted to marry the last one, so he filed for divorce.
As the divorce was in process..it came out that he didn't really like nor was he interested in any of those things I was..he had just pretended he was..

I asked why he married me then..(since we didn't have to...no kids)...
He said because I was cute and the sex was good...


So, after that, I became a LOT more discerning and particular...screen carefully.
That worked out better for the two long terms I had after him, but am now a widow, so I am back searching.

I don't think I *do* fall crazy in love...
I really loved and adored my late husband....and the guy before him...
They lit up my life/ world...and gave me great joy..and I would have rather been with them than anyone else in the world.
(and my late husband apparently felt the same way..based on the notes and cards and poems he wrote me, which I treasure)

But, if you are referring to the mindless, lose-all-common-sense type thing?
Nah....never been my style..
I'm far to practical and pragmatic for that...

If I had to spend the rest of my life with my ex, then "the one" would definitely be my constant companion.





Yeah, I'm always being left to pay the check.



I came to my senses.

Sometimes a woman loves a man but she can't live with him.

It's not good for her health to live in an unhealthy. Situation .

There can be a future love that will fit the mold much better.

Moldy love? You Humans are confusing.

Overall, I think what this describes, is one of many basic sub-stories that I thought everyone's life was supposed to be about, growing up in America.

I thought everyone was supposed to reach a certain age, then cast about for a career (which would be obvious to them); buy a house; and somewhere during all that, meet someone who was, if not a match made in heaven, at least someone who falls for you, and who you fall for.

What I experienced instead, was non-stop cacophony and nonsense. NOTHING in the real world matched any of the "official-issue" American Dreams I was handed as guides.

I did fall in love, a couple of times. But never with someone who also fell in love with me, to an equal degree.

And I did commit myself 100%, twice. Both times, my degree of commitment didn't matter at all; and I learned the hard way that love doesn't conquer a damn thing, unless the people in love are compatible with each other across a LONG vista of concerns.

More than anything else, if one or the other person has significantly different basic expectations for how a mate is supposed to behave, they WILL come to despise the person they are with. Or at least find them unsatisfactory enough to want them gone.

From one real point of view, it would be accurate to say that I never turned away from the people I fell in love with; what happened was, that I learned very painfully, that the people I did fall in love with, never actually existed. I just thought they did, and stayed, and stayed, hoping to figure out what the formula was, to unlock them from the shell of hatred or callousness that I came to see them in.

When I realized that the "shell" was the real person, it was time to give up.

Well I did fall in love in love with “the one” as you call it when I was like 25/26, and we were both in love with each other back then for a time but for some reason or another she believed her friends that I wasn’t “good enough” for her but all well, but to this day I still haven’t found someone like her even though I have loved again afterwards though

I submit wholeheartedly,i love enormously.But when lies and emotional manipulation and abuses ruled over,i leave.

Once,someone shows their true colors,don't try to repaint them and give yourself false hope.Chances are,you'll ended up at the losing end.

Relationship is and should be a safe haven to people who genuinely love not a battle field.

I'd presume,
That we all have, and build, dreams, that are often
more 'shiny' than the reality we're faced with.

That doesn't necessarily mean, that either partner
is unworthy of a relationship, affection, or love.

It could simply be, that one, or both partners,
built the "future" up in their minds, bigger and better
than the reality of it.

Dreamin' too big.

I don’t think that’s the case. I honestly believe that people change as,they age. It can be a good change or a bad one. If it’s a bad change, can you continue to live with it.

And THIS ^ is why it baffles me that it bothers people that I am careful, do due dilligence, ask questions about key, core issues, make sure we have a lot in common..

Because hormones will wane/ ebb & flow....and the two people better have other things that hold them together..that they actually *like* about the other person during those times.
Plus, there are days when for whatever reason you may not like your partner...but, if you have that closeness, that deep commonality/ compatibilty...you never lose the love...

If your mindset is "all that matters is I am atttracted to you...everything else will work out....none of that other stuff matters/ is important"..then you are not the person for me.
Been there, done that, got the t-shirt....not interested in doing that *again*.

I just didn't mention yelling, being called names, getting physically attacked, having post interfered with, etc. But the main thing is, the court hearing went 100% in my favour.

I solely agree with "no crazy in love"
But I believe that when you constantly seek or search for it then it will remain far from you. The best way I have seen true and genuine Love happen is in that rare scenario and not so good conditions. So I guess I let things go just as nature takes it's course . No perfect love rather build it to perfection through tolerance and respect.