Thank you, MsLeeHM. I hope one day this problem will be solved so that children don't grow up carrying the mental scars that you, I and countless of other people are carrying because even if time heals all wounds, those wounds are there for life.

"Thank you, MsLeeHM. I hope one day this problem will be solved so that children don't grow up carrying the mental scars that you, I and countless of other people are carrying because even if time heals all wounds, those wounds are there for life."

Sadly they are indeed there for life. But it is how we choose to deal with them that can make all the difference. My sister remained in denial and instead chose a life of alcohol and drugs until she finally succeeded in taking her life.

Fortunately for me I chose another path, of openness, of turning all those lemons into lemonade. For every scar I know I have helped others along their path. It doesn't make the scars disappear but it allows me to take something horrific and turn it into something wonderful.

Every time we speak out we reclaim a part of us that was taken, damaged and then forced to be hidden. Silence kills the spirit and sometimes the body. But it will not take me. :)

Whatever you do, don't even think of turning to psychiatry. Remember according to them, if your Ill, then you don't know that your ill . so they'll decide for you, what is real and what is not. They will simply try to delude you into believing that your deluded, and force uneccesary drugs on you, to help them to push you, wherever they choose for you to be pushed . and try to persuade you that you have an incurable brain disease. Even though the disease they say you have, doesn't actually exist. They will make a paraih of you for realizing or speaking of any of this. And effectively give you social leprosy.
They essentially find you when your at your weakest, and then offer you a hand up, while actually kicking you when your down.
Any the 1s they do lock up, are just a few, to try and create the impression that they do something about it.
That's what happens if you talk, and worse. Full stop.

Cynical much?

Psychiatrists are medical doctors who have a specialty in psychiatry - disorders of the mind. They look for illness. Some people are so disabled by the PTSD that is a result of the abuse that they need medications. Depression, and anxiety disorders are common among those who suffer and sometimes it is so bad that the person cannot even begin to deal with their issues. So for some people the right medication can go a long way to getting them to a point where they can do therapy.

Not all psychiatrists are pill pushers. I have had some refer clients to me because they knew there was only so much they could do.

The point is that IF you do need medication it be the right one, for the right reason, not addictive, and easy to come off of with your doctor's guidance when you don't need it anymore.

I recommend that before anyone starts therapy they have a physical with a GP or family doctor to rule out problems that might make counseling too difficult to handle. Trauma does nasty things to our bodies not just our minds. Those things need to be death with

^^^Exactly.

When I began therapy, my treatment plan stated very plainly that I was only to be on medication for 2 years. The meds were intended to facilitate my therapy, i.e. to make it easier for me to incorporate new coping strategies. Therefore, according to my treatment plan, I was expected to progress far enough with therapy that medication would no longer be necessary after 2 years. I have now been off medication for 22 months. I'm also no longer in therapy.

Newer science has shown that behavioral therapy can actually positively alter the physiology of the brain. As we learn new behaviors and thinking patterns, the brain grows new neural pathways. These new paths can help circumvent areas of the brain which are not functioning properly, such as the regions which control emotional regulation.

Science also has shown that drug and alcohol use during the teenage years stunts emotional development. The frontal lobe -- which is largely responsible for emotional regulation -- does not fully develop until age 21 - 24. Significant regular drug and alcohol use impact normal emotions. So the change in emotional behavior prompts the brain to grow abnormal neural pathways while the frontal lobe is still developing. This can only be corrected by sustained behavioral change, which can prompt the brain to grow neural pathways that are more like someone who never used drugs or alcohol to any significant extent. Thereby increasing the emotional maturity of the substance abuser.

There's a lot more to this than the average person has ever been made aware of. In fact, a lot of this has only been discovered in the past 20 years. Unfortunately, in health fields, it often takes 20+ years for new scientific research to filter down into actual medical practice nationwide. It's why we never heard about Autism until the late 1980s, and did not hear about ADHD until the early-to-mid 1980s. Scientific research had discovered both of these by the mid-60s to early-70s.

Actionlynx
Your story is a perfect example how it should work. People really started talking about this in the early 1980s. The research had to play catch up because the silence that had preceded it had lasted for almost 100 years. But some amazing research has been done on all aspects of sexual abuse and there are a lot more therapists who understand the problem. Many colleges and universities now have courses and entire programs devoted to teaching therapists how to help abuse survivors. Times have changed a lot since I started working with survivors.

Thank you for sharing.

My advice when people are looking for a counselor is that you shop around. If you don’t feel understood or the therapist doesn’t know about the issues then look for another one. Interview them. And keep looking until you find some one you can work together with.

I have too much to say about this on here! Religious cults!

Oh my I have that one too and it too has become one of my specialties in my career. I could write a few books on these topics

Thanks for the warning, R2, but I mentioned psychiatry and psychology for the abusers, not for me
Personally, I wouldn't mind if they turned the abusers into glassy-eyed zombies, at least they wouldn't hurt anyone anymore.

When it comes to the/rapists , counseling, and doctors, all roads lead to Rome. They'll send you, either with your will or without it, to a neo kraepelinian shrink. Simples, end off. And they don't have anything to offer other than pills, for which you will be the guinea pig. They won't let or help you come off them if you want to. And the withdrawals will be horrendous.
Dementia praecox, it used to be called.
They used to subscribe to hysterical paroxysm.
meet the new boss, same as the old boss
for I know that the hypnotised never lie......do you

Have you ever heard of Doctor Rufus May? The doctor who hears voices? Google him

Sorry r2d2 but your comment is I’ll informed. Granted some psychiatrists have no idea how to treat trauma resulting from any kind of abuse. However, many well trained psychiatrists have learned there is a lot about the study of trauma and are either referring patients to the specialists who do know how to treat it or they are taking the courses or are attending the conferences and reading the books so they can intelligently work with the patient. Many are working in tandem with the counselor to make sure the treatment is truly beneficial to the patient/client.

If you get the one who only wants to medicate all your problems then most definitely get a second or third opinion until you find a therapist or a team that works WITH you. Never put up with any professional who doesn’t understand your issues.

Are you having a laugh?
Ill informed? Ask for a different shrink?
Have you ever been sectioned? Do you even know what that is?
Do you think I pay to see a shrink?
Do you even know what a neo kraepelinian is?
Have you read rethinking madness?
Or googled Rufus May

No I am not laughing. Mental health problems are not a laughing matter. And yes I know what those are.

Getting the right help isn’t easy but it can be done.

I'm afraid madam, that it cannot.
I'm not so sure about your country. There the laws maybe different.
But the amount of times I've heard the phrase , my hands are tied, by some 1 or other is innumerable.
Which frankly is highly ironic, seen as it is in fact, my hands that are tied
All roads lead to Rome. They all sing from the same hymn sheet.
If they told the truth, they'd get fired, and worse.

Answer me this. Why tell some1, that they have an incurable brain disease. .
If that were so, it would show up on a scan.
But it does not. Because there is no such thing as paranoid schizophrenia.
They simply keep you sick , instead of allowing you to get better.
In other cultures, such conditions, are welcomed, and seen as some 1 who is gifted. Such as Shamans.
It is our culture, and the way these things are dealt with, which is sick

I am fortunate. I have not been sexually abused. But I worked in the prisons in our state for years. The sexual offender is reviled by even the murderer. In our system, general population in the prison usually "takes care of" the offender so he or she can never function again.
Many sexual offenders spend their entire sentence in protective custody so they eat, exercise and sleep entirely separated from other people. My daughter works with teens age 14 to 18 who have been extremely abused by worst of all -- their own parents. Whoever posted before me suggested a firing squad, count me in. And, on New Hampshire and Washington sTate, they still hang people on death row. Head for Utah if you want a firing squad. And be like Texas. DO IT.
Don't make the taxpayers pay for decades of Death Row persons.

In American jail, to be raped by another inmate is rife. So your statement seems like lunacy

R2D - I am not speaking of rape. I am speaking of much worse, in a manner which the person cannot function sexually anymore, nor handle the mental end of it. Many do not live, and it is not posted in the newspaper. Only the guards know about it, and turn a blind eye. You have responded to several on here as if THEY don't know what they are talking about. I have a suspicion it may well be that you don't know what YOU are talking about.

I've been to jail, and my uncle's a screw.
As for responding to others, I responded to 1 other. I asked a question. Since then they've gone weirdly silent.
And I still maintain that the most horrible thing about American jail, is the rape, which is effectively allowed to happen by the authorities. And that, that, is sick

My brother suffers from schizophrenia. And he indeed suffer with it when he isn’t taking hos medication. Not all diseases show up on scams. But the FACT that when he is on his meds he is not suffering, can hold down a job, support his family, pay his bills demonstrates that he does have a mental disorder that medication can help. Without his meds he can’t do any of those things.

As for it not appearing on a scan, well you can’t see depression or PTSD on some scans but MRI will ick those up AND schizophrenia. It is very real and MRIs and medical treatments that work prove it exists.

Now go take your meds