I know this is kinda off-topic of the intent of the thread but I like to cook. I like cooking hot and/or spicy foods.
I had one GF I used to cook for.
Most of the stuff I prepared I let her taste as I added spices.
She actually push away a plate she found too spicy.
I didn't take offense, I made her something else to eat.
She made me her mother's "Famous" chili.
She didn't drain the grease from the cooked meat.
I couldn't eat it. Told her I couldn't eat it.
She got angry with me.
I didn't get angry back, I just explained to her I didn't like it but I still like her.
Its was like I flipped a switch in her and everything was alright.
Later that night she complained about an upset tummy because the chili was too greasy.

In all cases, you can be truthful and not be rude or insensitive.
He/she is a person and deserves respect. Honesty doesn't have to be brutal.
How you treat others shows your personality.
I've been with a few women in public that are knock-out gorgeous and treat me like a prize but the belittle nearly everyone they encounter. Their personality is decietful and rude and if it is done to strangers it can be done to you.

Thanks Tom, well said. I believe you can be honest in all cases without being rude about it. I like how you explained to her that it was the food that you didn't like, that you still liked her.

Every woman that I have entered into a relationship but had to break it off, I did so without making her feel bad. Except my X because there was no saving her from the divorce and she wouldn't let go.

I break off relationships if the woman doesn't fit who I am looking for.
This is usually after some type of dishonesty or betrayal.
When I end it, I sit her down and tell her exactly why it won't work with us and assure her that she might find the one for her because I found a reason to want her in the first place so its not all bad.

I've even went as far listing their best qualities so they have a sense of worth.
There's no reason to crush her, send her into depression or break her self esteem. I truly do want her to be okay with us parting. I mean, after all, I did court her so there had to be something that attracted me to her.

I also find that nearly all my old GFs are still friends with me. We still send cards at Christmas and wish each other Happy Birthdays.

There's no reason to destroy someone by being honest.

Almost makes me wanna be your girlfriend so you can break up with me in such a special way

I'm kidding of course! That is nice and I think if we all could part amicably when things didn't work out, we'd all be so much better off. It would actually help us grow more instead of holding on to old hurts, resentments, and baggage that so many end up walking away with. Then when we enter a new relationship, we aren't carrying a bunch of old baggage. Much better and healthier!

If I chose poorly, why is that her fault?
Why should she be punished for my choice inaccuracies?
If I did choose correctly, I certainly wouldn't be alone.

This is why I feel my profile needs to be accurate and my picture current.
I want her to choose wisely if she chooses me.
If I perpetuate a ruse to attract her interest, I am locked into that ruse forever or I become a liar. Lying is dishonest.
A good relationship can't be built on dishonesty.

If all I were seeking was to get laid, honesty wouldn't matter.
I am looking for something more, something meaningful.
Its really hard to find someone that will be honest with you.
One of the hardest things to cope with is when someone promises their love for you and you find out they were lying.
If they can lie to you from the get go, how do you know they are not lying to you when they say they love you?
If you are truthful and honest and respect them for the person they are, when you tell them you love them they can believe you.

Many people fail before they start.

Another thing to be wary of is delusional thinking.

Someone wants to be a certain way but the reality of the way they are is something else.

One example might be
"I don't swear much"
Then after you get to know them they swear like a truck mechanic.

"I don't like porn"
Then after you get to know him he goes out with 'the boys' to the local strip club.

In their delusional mind they are being honest but in reality they are not.

I'm not so sure I would want to?

Here it is.... thanks Di. Ya could have waited til I finished my last post to Tom though


Just kidding!

Not sure you'd want to what, have me as a girlfriend or break up with me?

I believe we would make better friends, I still have a little growing to do in the emotional maturity department.

edited for typo

Either I lived under a rock, or I didn't know you were a mod


Anyways, honesty should be a vital key in any relationship, be it online or in real life.

not necesarily!!

i know SEVERAL people who HAVE to act like they are different peoople,cuz if they acted like they REALLY were,nobody would like them,or want to have anything to do with them!

so,for societies sake,for THEM,it is better that they dont act like their true selves!!



and THAT applies to EVERYBODY...even ME,at times,cuz there are times that if i said what i was REALLY thinking,it would probably NOT be a good thing!!!
[that is what is called 'having social skills'!!]