You must be a magnet, because it looks like you are attracted to my buns of steel.


I was looking at a light bulb today and it made me think of you and how you light up my world.

You know, we have actually met before. Remember the dream you had of the perfect guy? I was the guy standing to his right.

Is your name David? I want to be Goliath and fall for you.

This time next year let’s be laughing together.

Clarinets are wood and trumpets are horny, but a trombone can do it in 7 positions.

Can you pull this heart-shaped arrow out of my ass? A damn little kid with wings shot me.

Are you a terrorist? Cause your body is the bomb.
Do you know karate? Cause your legs are kickin'.

cheesy pick up line cutdown


i am by invitation only and i never remember sending you an rsvp

How was heaven when you left it?
I didn't know that angels could fly so low!

I lost my *****, can you help me find it? (works best on a fireman!)

are your legs tired? cause you have running through my mind all dayyy!

Excuse me ..do you have an extra cigarrette..cause you are smokinnnnn'

I have only three months to live. ..

I must be lost. I thought paradise was further south.