Love is not an addiction.

It is not taking a hostage or being taken hostage.

The type of romantic love that I learned about growing is a form of toxic love.


The...

"I can't smile without out you,"
"Can't live without you."
"You are my everything,"
"You are not whole until you find your prince/princess"

...messages learned in relationships, to romantic love in childhood are not descriptions of love - they are descriptions of drug of choice, of someone who is a higher power/false god.


Additionally, love is not being a doormat. Love does not entail sacrificing yourself on the altar of martyrdom - because one cannot consciously choose to sacrifice self if they have never truly had a self that they felt was lovable and worthy. If we do not know how to love ourselves, how to show respect and honor for ourselves - then we have no self to sacrifice. We are then sacrificing in order to try to prove to ourselves that we are lovable and worthy - that is not giving from the heart, that is manipulative, controlling, and dishonest.

Unconditional love is not being a self-sacrificing doormat - Unconditional love begins with loving yourself enough to protect yourself from the people you love if that is necessary. Until we start loving, honoring, and respecting ourselves, we are not truly giving - we are attempting to take self-worth from others by being compliant in our behavior towards them.

Love is not about success, achievement, and recognition. If I do not love myself - believe at the core of my being that I am worthy and lovable - then any success, achievement, or recognition I get will only serve to distract me temporarily from the hole that I feel within. From the feeling of being defective while growing up because the love that I received did match the ideals I was shown about what love really is.

Trying to take self worth from being a 'nice guy' or a 'princess' or from becoming a 'success' is not a part of truly being loved.

I personally like this one:

"Love is the slowest form of suicide."

Good way to die, and we all have to go sometime...

Mash Theme Song...Suicide is painless....
love sure isn't

AMPdog!!!!

Well said, and refreshing to hear.

I guess you'll find her first, since you've threaded the needle so well.

Good Luck, bro!!

Love is soap and candles and scented oils and satin cushions and loin cloths and food...

very STIMULATING

love is making each other's imagination run wild and just
going along for the ride. love like fear is uncontrollable
and can be all consuming but it is characterized by the
complete lack of fear.

Yep.

"Love is giving someone the power to completely destroy you, but trusting them not to."

OK... welll..... I posted this too many times... and well... it sucks.... LOL... so...

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