I was just wondering....

Is it ok for a 31 yo(m) to date a 18 yo(f)?

Just wanting peoples opinion.

If it was my 18 year old daughter I would be in no way supportive of the relationship.

Of course if my 18 year old daughter was dating a 31 year old it would mean I was a failure as a parent or I had a retard as a daughter.

Either way, my support or non support would be pointless.

13 years gap is okay..
But I think they should wait for few more years. 18 is still young.

I agree.

With a large age gap would you really have that much in common? I know some couples do make it work.

Date Yes. Have fun. Enjoy the moment.

The younger one will learn MANY new things.

The older one will feel younger.

But, if it gets serious then you will need to reexamine the situation. 13 years is a long time for someone so young.

When I was younger I had two relationships with women that were older then myself.

One was 9 years my senior the other was 14.

I can tell you that I really got an education. Most people become wiser with age. I was able to benefit from their wisdom and strengths. It made me a better much more understanding person.

I also had a relationship with a 10 year younger woman. That just didn't work at all. I could not relate with her. She was going through stuff that I dealt with years before. I slowly became a father figure guiding her along. That doesn't make for a great relationship. Although it does make a GREAT fantasy.

Age is more then just a number.

That's not bad but any more will be a problem....believe me

The older one, with such an age gap, will eventually get bored. The sex might be exciting for a while, but outside of the bedroom, it will be dull for the older individual. Not an opinion, just something that has been seen many times, in many studies that have been done. Age gaps mean less when both are older, but an 17 year old needs to be with a younger partner who is at the same stage in life. I dated an 18 year old woman when I was 25, and yeah, it was fun, but not all a relationship could be.

I agree with the idea of getting bored , 18 years old female is still a kid , what would a 31 years old male have in common with her ? very few topics to discuss , her interests are most probably different than his ....
in general this gab isn't huge , yet results in fewer things to share in the relationship

You have my blessing. But I would watch out for her dad.

Interesting responses, very much appreciated.

FYI, this is not in relations to my personal life.

My opionion on the matter is that, as long as the law says its legal, then its ok. :)

Although the debate is whether there is enough things in common with such an age gap, that all is depending on the two parties involved, it would be unfair to say that just because of the age gap, that the relationship wouldnt work. You just gotta look for like minds.

As long as you're not a sleeze, then it shouldnt be a problem.

As for the parents, it all depends on how you approach the situation. Honesty is always the best policy in this senario, be open and communicate with the folks, if they see you as a genuine person with good intentions, then it should make it very hard for them not to give you their blessings.

End of the day, i dont think there is ONE right answer to this topic...

Well that was my 2 cents.

:)

I'm curious myself. If an older woman dates a younger man, she's a cougar. Age gap does play a major roll within a relationship. Most say age doesn't matter. It does matter to the ones outside the relationship.
So, does the age gap really matter?

I'm curious myself. If an older woman dates a younger man, she's a cougar. Age gap does play a major roll within a relationship. Most say age doesn't matter. It does matter to the ones outside the relationship.
So, does the age gap really matter?

Heres some food for thought for all you out there.

So if an older woman dates a younger man, she is labeled a cougar. Right?

But if a older man dates a younger girl, he is labeled a pedo. :)

Talk about sexisim!!

But then again, why should it matter what others think? If the law says its ok, then its OK!

Go ahead :) wish you all the best.

lmao

what don't you understand about "FYI, this is not in relations to my personal life."?

As long as both of them love each other. Age is not a matter at all.

It's below the half your age plus 7 rule, which suggests your date should not be younger than 22, so 'western society' believes it is outside of what it considers as normal. If you are both happy to date each other then it's OK in my opinion, but be prepared for a few raised eyebrows.

That's the sad part ' the raised eyebrow'. If two people are happy & every one can clearly tell, why the eyebrow? Guess it comes with everything. I'm all for seeing happiness!

This is such a complicated topic . If the 18 year old was my daughter, i would be worried that she is being exploited sexually.

But to be fair , in many age gap relationships,.there is mutual exploitation going on. The older one is often taking up all the financial responsibilities in the relationship and holds most of the power in decision making and the younger person is often sexual candy and entertainment. Please note that I said often but not always. :)


With wide age gap relationships, my preference is that they both be 25 and over because the incompatibilities of wide age gap relationships require at least a modicum of mature thinking.

And for the 15 and over age gaps , my ownly caution is that the couple be practical about thd future text book challenges such couples often encounter.

Eg 1. insecurities for the older person as they start showing signs of age physically while the younger mate's peers are more appealing visually.

2. Feelings of boredom for the younger person if the older person reaches that stage of inactivity and the young er one in most cases remains vibrant and hungry for active adventure. Or if thr older prrsin gets intellectually bored with the younger person

3.The reality that the older person is basically committing to a moving target with a much younger entity, since a person's needs and priorities and values evolve HEAVILY between the age of 21 and 35

4. Child bearing incompatabilities. A woman or man may claim they dont want kids between 25 and 35 but many people go through a sharp change of heart in that regard when the age if 40 is approaching

Those potential challenges are faced by all couples I think,. but its doubled with wide age gaps.There are some definite exceptions , who really go the distance despite the wide age gap challenge. Thereforr I wouldnt tell people it cant work,.but they have to be aware of the added challenges they face, and know that they are fighting against some huge odds . Not impossible. But very hard. The same applies to long distance relationships

I also think these relationships work out better generally for people who want to live in the moment and enjoy short term benefits and memories than peopke who are banking.on something long term