When I first heard of "rough sex", it was more of an underground movement , celebrated by part of the gay community and the entire sex industry.

But it seems like slapping, choking, spitting on each other etc ,has become quite normal in everyday sexual practices.

Has sex become too rough in your opinion?

Do you feel pressured to learn more "rough" tricks to be more desirable in bed ?

Do the guys feel nervous about accusations of abuse/violence when raising the issue of rough sex with new lovers?





(Seeking special assistance from the Mods to keep this thread clean. Soufie and Kristie, if you are reading this, please help a sister out!)

Rough Sex! Yes! What........ What's going on?




Oh.... Yeah, I'm not really into that kind of rough sex.

I have had a couple girl friends that wanted to be "Fake Raped" but I just gave them a weird look and said that's not going to happen.

I'm not interested in forcing anything.

I thought rough sex was biting a nipple....some of the things people are into(choking, whipping, spitting) is insane and often shows lack of self respect..but then again...to each their own

I think what used to be considered abnormal is now becoming the norm


the pron industry has millions of vids depicting bondage and pseudo rape scenes


it seems that there is a market for the extreme


and this expectation is now bleeding over into the bedroom


from a psychological point of view

why would a person want something that is supposed to be pleasurable

to now involve pain? or want to inflict pain on another person?



yes yes I have heard it heightens the senses


but there is something else going on


it is the desire to dominate, humilate, hurt another human being

Yeah rape fantasies seem to be a growing fascination in society today. Im not sure what to make of it.

I think the world is going mad,all the problems we have with rape and child abuse rough sex is not the road a man should go down leaves him wide open.women should not lower them selfs to this abuse just to earn a buck.

Im wondering if people are just bored with their lives, and are just going more and more extreme with sex to get the high that they lack in their lives in general

sex isnt rough enough

Just another weird and sick perversion in my view, certainly nothing to do with love.

I think mild rough sex is very enjoyable. Tying up, slapping butt, twisting and pinching nipples, and pulling hair.
Hard rough sex is also fun with equal understanding of each other's limits.

I get the azz slapping... and can wrap my head around a lil light choking....but the whole spitting on someone throws me off. Which if strange....because other...umm, how can I say this....bodily fluids are swapped routinely, even saliva, but....spitting ON someone just seems wrong. I'll pass on that one.


You could have a point.... Even South Park did an episode where it explored porn....with Randy getting more and more extreme with his subject searches lol. Art imitating life, so to speak.

popping some popcorn

I have thought about it TMom, and I also think there is something deeper going on here. Maybe its related to the gender evolution issue. Maybe some guys feel powerless in the home and are excited by the opportunity to dominate and release angst in the bedroom, and maybe some women are tired of their leadership roles and are glad to subconsciously dominated in the bedroom. I don't know. Im trying to figure it out myself

ahhhhh...now we are getting somewhere

I cannot say if there has been an increase in interest in BDSM lifestyle

over the past few decades

or if it has always been there

but access has increased with internet



I think part of it may have to do with changing gender roles over the years

of course not all career women want to be submissive in bed

and not all men who feel powerless in their job come home and want to tie

the wife up

Wowsa! Don't think I could do that man. Even if my mate asked me too. I would be too busy worrying about him to enjoy anything else that followed

<--------Volunteer

Hi Jimp53. I do think couples have the right to choose whatever makes them happy. There are many people that don't consider it as lowering themselves when they do it. They look at each other as equals who share the same sexual interests. I guess if neither party feels disrespected or damaged, all is fair in love and war.

On the other hand, I could see how perpetuating these images to younger more impressionable minds via porn, could lead down the dangerous road you talked about so we have to view it from both sides

On a side note...when I see a thread like this.... I begin to wonder how many lurkers are viewing....their moms dark, dank basement lit only from the light cast from their computer screen...and a bottle of microwave heated baby oil within reach.


Not a knock on your thread Ms Peggy....the place could use more like it....just an observation

Well , its all up to you and your partner to decide SCDCF2

I think there is a divide on this issue Sylvia. Some view it as sexual perversion, whereas some see it as a spicy evolution of sex .

As for what you said about sex in relation to love, it seems to me like sex and relationships have very little to do with love in general these days. But maybe that is me being pessimistic