Topic: If your gf will cheat on you, will you give her the second c
TMommy's photo
Sat 05/28/16 10:28 AM
try it like this

dumb azz

adivorcedone's photo
Sat 05/28/16 11:11 AM
precise and to the point....as always....lol...

Newuwood's photo
Sat 05/28/16 11:14 AM
it all depends on the magnitude of love i have for her. Sure everyone is entitled to forgiveness ...how else could we've managed this far. Forgiveness starts at the house ( you ) ...what do for yourself youll do the next.

Annierooroo's photo
Sat 05/28/16 02:08 PM

try it like this

dumb azz


No that's more lady like.
Thanks

mzrosie's photo
Sat 05/28/16 02:42 PM
Edited by mzrosie on Sat 05/28/16 02:44 PM

What if your gf is having an affair with any other person or had intimate relationship.. and if she confesses and is guilty, will you forgive her?



If your gf or bf cheated on you, they are not ready for a committed relationship. If they confessed and you forgave them, you might as well pick up a rock and hit yourself on the head.

If they cheated on you once and you forgave them, they would think that it is ok to cheat on you again.




IMO, once a cheater, always a cheater.

wainaing's photo
Sun 05/29/16 04:07 AM
cheating is a crime. confessed or not

hardwick25's photo
Sun 05/29/16 01:41 PM
love wants us to give a second chance but wisdom should deny it...trust me been there 3 times over 20 years...cant fix stupid.

msharmony's photo
Sun 05/29/16 01:50 PM
Edited by msharmony on Sun 05/29/16 01:52 PM

I agree with Duttoneer. Since I am looking for someone who demonstrates the qualities of being a compatible life partner down the road, I probably would not give a boyfriend who cheats a second chance. If they dont have the self control to remain faithful for 4 or less years , then they are not likely to remain faithful over a lifetime.

However, when it comes to marriage, I am not quick to abandon my vows .

I would really have to go through a period of separation and some couple's counseling to assess FOR MYSELF what is the attitude of my mate to their infidelity.

The people who are prone to cheating REPEATEDLY in my opinion, have a few common traits, and if I identify those traits , I don't think I would want to give them another chance.The traits are:-

1. They justify their cheating by listing their partner's inadequacies, that 'forced' them into the arms of another

2. They are arrogant and insensitive in their attitude, insisting that their apology is enough , and that their mate is unreasonable for being weepy or angry about the infidelity, or even mentioning the infidelity after the apology

3. Even after the cheating incident , they refuse to conform to a lifestyle of transparency, eg indicating their whereabouts,socialising with members of the opposite sex only in public settings, giving up their passwords for their social media, their phone etc. , and deactivating from all dating sites.

I don't look merely at apologies people offer after their wrong doing. I look for a change of attitude , actions/lifestyle.

Any mate displaying the 3 traits that I mentioned above, does not give me any hope that they will change their behavior in the longterm, and if that is the case, it is wiser for us to part ways.





well put,, details matter when it comes to forgiveness and reconciliation

i went through this with a domestic altercation,, there was true remorse, counsel, and change,,,

without that , it would have ended us then and there


flowerforyou

tripathinavaneet's photo
Sun 05/29/16 02:27 PM
I cannot tolerate any body doesn't matter she is my girlfriend or wife. Because i never cheat anybody.

capertown1's photo
Mon 05/30/16 10:12 AM
No...Once a cheater always a cheater....

peggy122's photo
Mon 05/30/16 10:12 AM
Edited by peggy122 on Mon 05/30/16 10:16 AM


I agree with Duttoneer. Since I am looking for someone who demonstrates the qualities of being a compatible life partner down the road, I probably would not give a boyfriend who cheats a second chance. If they dont have the self control to remain faithful for 4 or less years , then they are not likely to remain faithful over a lifetime.

However, when it comes to marriage, I am not quick to abandon my vows .

I would really have to go through a period of separation and some couple's counseling to assess FOR MYSELF what is the attitude of my mate to their infidelity.

The people who are prone to cheating REPEATEDLY in my opinion, have a few common traits, and if I identify those traits , I don't think I would want to give them another chance.The traits are:-

1. They justify their cheating by listing their partner's inadequacies, that 'forced' them into the arms of another

2. They are arrogant and insensitive in their attitude, insisting that their apology is enough , and that their mate is unreasonable for being weepy or angry about the infidelity, or even mentioning the infidelity after the apology

3. Even after the cheating incident , they refuse to conform to a lifestyle of transparency, eg indicating their whereabouts,socialising with members of the opposite sex only in public settings, giving up their passwords for their social media, their phone etc. , and deactivating from all dating sites.

I don't look merely at apologies people offer after their wrong doing. I look for a change of attitude , actions/lifestyle.

Any mate displaying the 3 traits that I mentioned above, does not give me any hope that they will change their behavior in the longterm, and if that is the case, it is wiser for us to part ways.





well put,, details matter when it comes to forgiveness and reconciliation

i went through this with a domestic altercation,, there was true remorse, counsel, and change,,,

without that , it would have ended us then and there


flowerforyou


I'm shocked Ms. H.

I really thought I was the only person who held this freakish point of view .flowerforyou

I take marriage (and divorce) so seriously that I would want to TRY to work through every problem. But I have to see COLD HARD EVIDENCE of attitude and lifestyle changes by my mate, as you adopted in the situation you mentioned.

If my mate is putting in the same amount of work that I am in rebuilding the marriage from ground zero,then I'm all in.

If I'm not willing in advance to at least TRY to work through relationship problems , then I will not bother to make those marriage vows a second time around .

no photo
Mon 05/30/16 03:19 PM
But if she knows this. Then why would she tell you

Dewman01's photo
Mon 05/30/16 10:48 PM
Cheat on them if there cheating on u

boone1209's photo
Tue 05/31/16 01:52 AM
I'm down for forgiveness for anything really. I've been given second chances in everything I've ever done in life. Even when not deserving of it. Everybody gets a one up in my book. God forgives for everything but the relationship discontinues after the second time and until that loyalty is established again it just wont happen. Love to love, don't let it make you bitter.

yuan1968's photo
Tue 05/31/16 09:04 AM
if my gf cheated on me well i give her a respect for what her decission made made of but i give her too a middle finger salute for what she made of xD

dawn121314's photo
Sat 06/11/16 07:18 AM
See ya I hate cheater if they will cheat once there do it again and I won't wait around for the next time I've been cheated on a lot and I just got fed up with relationships can't find the rite girl who won't cheat on me

livingsingle15's photo
Sat 06/11/16 10:21 AM
Once a cheater, always a cheater. If you just want a f..kbuddy, then fine, forgive her, just keep it wrapped because you don't know what's been in there before you. If you want a true trusting relationship, move on, enough folks that have been cheated on (myself included), that knows how it feels and won't do it.

Been2LongSince's photo
Sat 06/11/16 01:42 PM

What if your gf is having an affair with any other person or had intimate relationship.. and if she confesses and is guilty, will you forgive her?


I will forgive her, but the relationship is over and we will go our separate ways.

darkowl1's photo
Sat 06/11/16 02:30 PM
yes, I forgive any and every creature for all misgivings and crimes.... but trust? they have to earn that.

and.......... will I like them from then on? depends on the misgiving or crime.


I'm happily alone forever though, so it doesn't apply to a hideous entity like me...

no photo
Sat 06/11/16 03:21 PM
So true, and how can woman cheat get pregnant and leave her kids to start all over