A man's house is on fire. He runs out of the house with his son and tells him to wait outside. Then he runs back in and gets is daughter and brings her ouside. Then his wife. Then the dog. Then he goes back in a couple of times without bringing out anybody.
So a fireman asks him,
"Why are you going back in there?"
The man replies,
"I'm turning over my mother in law."

ROFLMAO

This guy's house blew up because of a lawn mower.

THIS IS AN OLD ONE WITH UPDATED TWIST. One fine day a man walks into a pharmacy and has a perscription filled for Viagra. The man bieng up in years draws questions from the pharmisist. 'Say old timer, do you know what this medicine is for?', says the pharmisist. 'Sure do', says the old man. 'Got a few girls comming up to the house tonite and I need all the help I can get'. So the pharmisist fills the perscription and the old timer walks out the door. The very next day the same man walks into the same pharmacy, and talks to the same druggest. But this time the old man looks as if he's aged twenty years. His eyes were all sunken in and bloodshot, he was stooped over with a frail gait. The pharmisist looked at him and exclaimed 'My god man, what has happen to you, you look terible'. 'You think that's bad look at this'. And the old man puls out his male member and lays it on the counter. It looks like a peice of raw hamburger, that's been through the the meat grinder. 'I need some Ben-gay'. The old man says. 'You can't put Ben-gay on that'. The pharmisist says. 'It's not for that'. The man says, 'I'ts for my arms, those girls nevr showed up last night'.