.... so a little Dorothy lost in Oz.. just click my ruby red slippers together and everything will be better..oui... keep my head down and plow through it... hard work is the key to everything..hmm... tow the line be everything to everyone..... yes it is better to try and fail than to never try.... exhaust all resources look down all avenues... just to find yourself staring once again at the dead end wall.....hmm..

OMG ! This makes me think of someone really close that is going through this....

and I do not recognize her at times...although both of her children want her to have her own fun...she isn't. I sometimes wonder if she still knows what could make her happy.

Even on a day off with the kids on the beach she is not "present".

that formula...you know the one I mean
does NOT always work my good doctor..


if you want to rise to the top of your profession
you learn more, do more, then anyone else

if you want to be a good student
you buckle down, study more, give more effort
than anyone else

" if you just work hard, then you will achieve success"

does NOT always work in a marriage

Spoken like a true worker bee..lol..jk..

I am ready for a truly great passionate love. I don't have kids. I find most guys have kids so that is one thing that gets in the way.

a married woman in a loveless and sexless marriage wants casual sex?
HOW DARE SHE?
What should you tell her? Well, if she's asking you, be honest.. you are either, yourself, looking to casual date,(or)-you are looking for your soul-mate ; someone to spend the rest of your life with .. figure that one out first..those looking for casual sex have already determined what they want..

Why indeed do women/men stay in such a relationship? As Bob Dylan sings.. Things Have Changed.. I am going to suggest fear, complacency, dollars, upbringing/morals, religion..to name a few.
Should we break free of marriage to persue our own pursuits? Absolutley. Look after yourself first so you can look after others.. Like in an aircraft - put the oxygen on yourself first, then the baby.
A cliche comes to mind - Look after numero uno

I have more to say, but I'm pondering..

Thanks guys and girls for this thread. After reading all posts here I found the answer to the really bothering me question. I am convinced now that there is no need to keep the unhappy marriage for the sake of the child. Feels like a boulder off my shoulders. Nice

.. is pondering code for pouring more whiskey into your teacup..lol

..well.. everyone needs to do what's best in their own situation... sometimes staying until the children are old enough.... is best.. if the relationship is tolerable..... after all . Wedding vows do include for better or worse..... nothing about pursuing your own happiness..lol..

I'm a Southern Comfort on the rocks kinda gal..so close..

.. well maybe there's hope for you after all ..wink..I'm a Southern Comfort and rootbeer guy my self ..lol

All that Sitka said. Kids feel it when parents don't love each other. Apart from that missing vibe, they also don't kiss, cuddle and touch each other anymore, you know, all the things ppl do when they love one another.
Kids aren't stupid.

It does damage to them, because it gives them a totally wrong idea of what a relationship is and should be like. So how are they supposed to form healthy relationships themselves later in life?

Basically you're lying to yourself, your kids and your partner. So you're setting the example for your kids that lying is the done thing. And then you expect them to respect you?

You know, I think people use children as an excuse because they lack the baws to leave. I think those people would stay another 10 years even if they didn't have children, just because they're scared to be alone.
Almost everyone fears being alone.
Fear of being alone and fear of not enough money are stronger reasons than kids if you ask me. So even the story about having the kids' best interest at heart is a(nother) lie.

I have no respect for people who do this sort of thing. I've come across plenty of men like that.
My idea: "Grow a spine and some baws! And be a good chap now and FO!!"
I don't want a man without a backbone. Period.
I need a bloke who is able to make hard decisions in life, not some sissy.

As for your question: What do I do with these women?
Since you're in the same situation: You sexercise them. That's what you want, it's what they want. And swap after-sex-stories as to why neither of you are going to divorce. Then have some more sex.
If they need therapy, you charge a fee

ha, ha,... what she said ^^^

ok, well, that's just alcohol abuse... adding a pop to the southern comfort..its straight on ice for me!

..the two of you !crack me up... maybe the three of us should get together and talk about the first thing that pops up....lmao...omg I haven't used that line ,since junior high..lol

Nice to see we bring out ..up .. out the best of you ...
I'm game! Only thing is ... I cannot swap after-sex stories about why I don't wanna divorce, cos I am truly single ... and Rusty prolly bail out before the sexercises as she has a man ...
Ain't life a biot(h ...

WAIT A MINUTE!!! Someone mention Southern Comfort?!! OH YEAH BABY, I'm definitely in!!!

yup.. they come for the sex but they stay for the southern comfort..lol.. story of my life

Hai

A girl's gotta kill the time till you have recovered for round two

no no.. silly woman.. it is about around 4.. when they need a little pick me up.. and hit the southern comfort..lol