family and friends can be slightly awkward.
This insightful guy mentioned that, because you behave differently when flirting and mostly family and (some) friends aren't used to that. Esp if those friends date from when you were still in a relationship. Or when they're married themselves. Married/involved people are different and do different things from singles, so it might kind of clash...

Now first I thought, "a load of b*ll*cks" ...
...until I was having coffees with my only just 20 yr old daughter in law and saw this REALLY cute guy.
He was sitting there on his own, having a beer, and he was really cute. The kind that I should've flirted with.
He occasionally looked over at me.
And there's me thinking, "Bleep! This is awkward! If I start flirting with my daughter in law there, that's just weird!"

Same thing with the brother of my gal pal. Awkward. I sometimes see him in the shop or in the street, so that would be okayish. But I also see him at her place. No way do I feel comfy having a flirty thing going with him there. Meaning sometimes I would and other I wouldn't be flirty. Not handy.

Ever been in situations like that? What do you do?
You still are ballsy and go for it anyways? Or do you hold back? (and later on think, Bleep, that would've been a GREAT opportunity!)
Remember, not just friends, but also when your kids or grandkids are there.

What do you do in those situations?

well for starters, my family is made up entirely of equal opportunity under the bus throwers. so if you don't do it yourself, you just might find it done for you. at show stopping volume , across the coffee shop.

" HEY YOU IN THE PINK DRESS MY BROTHER THINKS YOUR PRETTY! WHAT DO YOU THINK OF HIM?




by the same token their kibitzing could help. so i would say as long as you meter it to an appropriate response based on if it is mum or a young niece for example, then go for it

I am naturally flirtatious or at least I was told this by my ex-wife at some point after the ending of the marriage. Bearing that in mind, since I'm with the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with, I make a concerted effort to shut that part of me down. I do it here and at all times in the public no matter if she is there or not.

It is difficult since I was never quite clear as to what constitutes flirting, so I just "fill the corner" in those types of situations.


BTW, good question. It is rare to see something that makes me want to answer with a reasoned response...

Why thank you!
And yes, I think it's interesting, hope more ppl will reply! Interesting to learn how others deal with it, I might learn a thing or two, hihi.

It's about different roles you play in life that clash at such moments. Like if I was to flirt with my son around, my mom-role would clash with my single-and-looking-for-a-bloke role. These two don't really compute, do they?
My son might simply find it amusing, not entirely sure. I will ask him, could be interesting
Fact remains that kids -no matter what age- do not really wish to think of their parent as an eligible bachelor/rette. They wanna (need?) to see them as 'old' (compared to them), not sexy, flirty etc.
Been there once with a rather sexy stage-outfit. Both my kids were like "OMG, this can NOT be happening!!!" Their friends asking who that sexy woman was, someone replying, "Oh that's xxx's mother." LOL My kids were not amused, moms don't do that!!!, while I was having the time of my life.

Haha, that could indeed help, how embarrassing it may be. I don't have a lot of family, so that won't happen to me.
I had a similar thing done by a vague friend with a man I was supposed to meet after a gig. Drummer of a band. That all went t*ts up because of my friend's intervening. I was not amused, nor was he.
Crying shame, cos dang, that guy was cute!

At this point in my daughters' lives I cannot riff off of what they might think. I simply need to do what is in my best interest. However, fortunately for me, they are smart, savvy, and want what will make me happy. I cannot say for sure what I'd do if they ever objected to the way I carry myself, but I suspect I would take each situation individually. I'd have a problem if they tried to paint me with a "broad brush."

Crystal, I am a person that is really friendly and some take that as flirting. Since I am with Pancho I also consciously turn it down a bit. Now I have to find the happy medium since I have had some close friends ask me if I was okay.

There isn 't a person alive if I am interested in that I won't say hello to.The interest doesn 't mean in a romantically way it just means I am interested in something about them.

When I was single and saw something that made my brain do a double take, I would always smile a bit more making sure the smile made it to my eyes and was warm and engaging. To figure out if any interest was coming back. If it was I don't care if my family, colleagues, you name it around I am going to engage them in a conversation. I might even excuse myself from the group I was with saying I will be aback and go over and engage and a few times I have even asked said person to come back and join us.

Now I am thinking that maybe my style was mixed up and I didn't know what I was doing.. Dang...

flirting...pfffft ya I don't do that stuff

Are you asking if its okay to flirt around family and friends.. heck I use my boys to lure women over to me..lol.
And I can't count on both hands how many times... I've turned Milo into my little pimp

Yeah, but that's different. Your kids prolly don't ever see you NOT flirting and stuff ...

I could nor would ever use my children. I respect them too much for that.

Generally I prefer flirting when I am out on my own but occasionally I have when my kids were older. Unfortunately two six footer sons and their usual linebacker type best buds in tow it does get a little intimidating for guys. lol Even in military communities where the ratio is five guys to every female.

I did not go out with the gals too often because I don't want to the designated driver when the gal pals get loaded trying to flirt with whom ever. And if I meet someone interesting I don't want to have to deal with them trying to get my friend a date rather than the whole awkward third wheel deal.

I would NEVER flirt when my sisters were around; that was sure to go badly. With eight; and cousins it was pretty much guaranteed it would not be "reviewed " to the parents. When they got older the fix ups with their lame single friends; Oh brother.

My real dad was consistently looking for someone for me in his later years and was why I lingered too long in one "relationship" because he liked him but now I hear his voice in my head saying get busy and find someone so I tend to have a sidekick even if I am out and flirting as a solo act.

LOL I have found a dog is a good flirting prop. Civilians are pretty shy when it comes to flirting but people will talk to you with a dog; sometimes more than you want. lol

.. all fair in love and war I say..lol... yeah I' may look when I am out with my boys.. but that's as far as it ever goes.. Justin my oldest usually says.. why don't you just take a picture..dad. It will last longer..lol.. to which I say good ideal son.. can I borrow your phone..lol

Yeah, dogs can be good. I haven't got one though. Would like one one day, but not yet. Plus .. many larger dogs scare the bejesus out of me, so having a dog could turn out to be a nightmare. I mean, I'd have to walk it, whether there's nasty dogs around or not. I'll wait with the dog till I got the man.

I am seriously curious how my son would feel if I'd flirt when he was in the vicinity. And I will ask him, lol.

So what about when around family like your parents or siblings? Or when there's employees etc around and there happens to be a nice woman?

Oh Poo!!! Go flirt whenever the opportunity arises!!

"He who hesitates is lost!"

"Time waits for no man!"

"A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush!"

And all that!

Okay, first off, I take it we're talking about purposefully unusual behavior, specifically designed to hint to someone we are attracted to, that they are interesting to us as more than passing acquaintances. Purposeful flirting, not just behaving in a friendly way because we're cheerful.

I can't do it. I've been rotten at it since forever. Every attempt I made to try to do it when I was younger, embarrassed me so intensely that I completely gave up on ever trying to do it again.

I have since then, had a few instances where I realized later that someone THOUGHT I was flirting, because I can be fairly gregarious in public situations. The hint I got, was that they got angry at me for "leading them on."

So no, I wouldn't try again in front of anyone, because I wont do any "flirting" at all.

I came of age in the 1980s.
Too direct to recognize flirting.

Not flirt and pay attention to the person I'm with.
To me it's no different than not answering my cell phone when I'm with someone, or not asking the waitress out when I'm on a date with another woman.

But I tend to go months or years without seeing family members.
I might behave differently if I saw them every single day and they didn't care if I just ditched them for a while.

Get the phone numbers from the two in the bush,just in case.

When our family have get togethers. there is a huge crowd with a lot of friends and that could be up to over 50 people as I come from a huge family.
We are very friendly people and will talk to anyone.
I could be talking to a guy and he's flirting I would not have picked it up. I would think he's being friendly but if he gets crude then I tell him don't talk like that to me. My family and friends will tell me.
If they pick up I like a guy they go up to him and check him out then report back by then I taken off.
My sister has this neighbor across the road she want to set me up with. His name started with a D. I have a rule no one who start with a D.
My family do try to match me up. I do come up with good reasons why not. They only care.