It's a funny thing. Intuitive perhaps. A voice inside your head saying that you do want this person. They turn you on or they turn you off and it seems like a very primal thing but there's maybe a difference between me saying, "She's totally hot and she seems nice and she's up for it. Hell, yeah!" and sitting there trying to see if it's there with somebody that isn't exactly like that.

Now, I understand that you can't always expect them to be totally hot and up for it and perhaps you do need to get to know each other a bit first. Some people might even have their reasons for needing to get to know someone first even if they are hot and up for it. Maybe they're fighting off the hotties and aren't really in a hurry.

How does it happen? How do you become hot and up for it with somebody that isn't hot and up for it? Is there really any point in going on a date if they aren't hot and up for it?

that all depends ts. what is the goal? a happy ending, a happily ever after, or just a night out with good company?

as for how, it's a combination that works differently for each of us of looks attitude and even smell. whether or not it is reciporicated

Doesn't matter. I honestly don't know how to get a second date with somebody that isn't hot and up for it. I'm rubbish at pretending that I'm interested in women that I don't fancy.

then don't try. but how about one that is up for it but isn't hot, only warm?

Through a complicated process involving social training and hormones?


VIA your senses and thoughts triggering your brain flooding your body with chemicals?


Of course.
Women have a biological protection against being "hot and up for it" unlike men.
It's why men became the "chasers."
It's not in a woman's best interest to become "hot for it" the same level as men.
If they did, then they'd be walking around pregnant on a constant basis, you ever bang someone you weren't proud of? Too drunk? Just lonely and wanted to get laid? If you get them pregnant, you can run away, deny it's yours, women can't. Effective birth control and DNA tests aren't an old technology.

Men are socially trained to suppress their emotional responses.
If they didn't, there'd be a lot more problems at work of guys drooling on themselves as the hot receptionist or boss or whatever pc thing walked by.

Going on dates allows people to let out their repressed "hot for it" feelings in a safe, socially trained, environment.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interpersonal_attraction
http://www.youramazingbrain.org/lovesex/sciencelove.htm
https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/199303/the-biology-attraction
http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/hottopics/love/
http://www.discovery.com/tv-shows/other-shows/videos/other-shows-science-of-sex-appeal-videos/

There's some informative, entertaining, and interesting links.

I wouldn't go for a second date either if she didn't fuel my injectors on the first date....chemistry is very important other then just being hot.
i've dated hot chicks that i really clicked with & others that were plain weird...i've met all types, so personally i would prefer chemistry being above then just being hot but i prefer hot

After the chemistry i would have physics practicals with her which would eventually lead to biology

Right. So, if she's not "stunning" but she maybe has big boobs you can work with that. It's something you want anyway. If you like big boobs and she's up for it there's a bit of chemistry there and you're initially and tentatively interested in her at least.

She might be a really cool person and even if she isn't super hot you would bang her maybe. You're just not that bothered if she can't compensate for being someone that isn't completely gorgeous, so you have to get to know her a bit first before you can tell if she can do that.

Seems like they have to overcompensate maybe but that's debatable. Like when someone that tries to make her think that he's a nice guyhas to do that because women don't find him sexually atractive and he reasons that women can get hot guys if they want, so that they don't care about that and just want a nice guy. The obvious fallacy here is that assuming that women should want a nice guy means that that's all that they want. Also that hot guys aren't nice because they don't have to try to be nice to get women, therefore they're not nice.

Oh.. such a huge dilemma lol..

.But is it anything like Spending a week getting to know someone online or on another dating site.. and I mean really getting to know them .. and then you go meet and greet with them.. and physically they really do not do anything for you..
now the question becomes.. are you so vain that it has to always be about their looks or how hot they are..
because here is this person you have spent a week being very well let's just say intimately involved with... and now that they are standing in front of you in person.. you realize they're not quite as hot as some of their out of focus pictures betrayed them to be..
but the intense feelings you have for them online have not changed..
perhaps it is a question we truly do.. eat or food with our eyes first.. but what do I know

.

.. yes it is I constantly have a boner whenever you're online lol

I was thinking about you talking about someone being hot and what you mean by that.
I don't really get it as you mentioned several times in the forums that you can't see much, so how can you tell if someone is hot?
Now you're talking about big boobs and a woman looking hot. No offense, but how can you tell when you can't see much?
I'd say that if you can't see much it would be mostly about personality and sound of a voice, as you have nothing else to go on. Certainly not looks.
Sorry to say, but something about your stories doesn't add up ...

.. but but but without it the doctor said I won't be able to maintain a boner

Maybe give it a rest, No1? I think it may be suffering from Kleenex fatigue

Well, I'm flattered that you pose that question to me Crystal and not just because you have a curiocity about gimps but I can at least tell myself that you're interested in finding out more about me and trying to understand me as a person, even though you have no doubt gathered by now that it's going to be complicated to do that.

What was the question again? Well, the easy answer is to say that I'm not completely blind and when I make love to a beautiful woman it's not a completely tactile thing. It's true though that that sense is impaired and I can perhaps be a better lover because my other senses are comparitively heightened in comparison.

But anyway, to go back to trying to answer your question, you seem to be saying that I'm talking shite when you say that my story doesn't stand up. Well, all that I can say to that really is that if you took your bra off I could tell you if you have big boobs without touching them and it wouldn't be like reading the bottom line of an optician's chart. From a certain distance I might even be able to tell if your nipples were hard. I can watch porn, even if I don't get the same benefit that a fully sighted person would get and because my sight is impaired a woman would perhaps have to be more gorgeous than she would have to be for me to find her beautiful if I could see better.

But sure, on a site like this with tiny little pictures that you can't tell much from you can get turned on by things that they say and maybe you fantasise a bit and imagine what it would be like to make love to them.

I mean, if it wasn't someone just being suspicious they might ask me a question like that out of genuine curiocity and get turned on by my talking about them getting their boobs out for me. I tell them before I meet them that I have sight problems and they don't really know what to expect. They can imagine a bit what it would be like though and maybe tell themselves that at least I won't be looking at other women. Maybe they think about what it would be like to be with a guy that isn't all visual. I wouldn't know though. That's just me fantasysing about women fantasising about me.