when she listens to your dreams and stands beside you in the failures because she believes in you
When she rubs your back after a hard day
When she buys your favorite food at the store
When she tells you that the shirt you have on doesn't look good.. because she always wants you to look good.
When you just look at her and she just smiles.
When she worries about you when you are traveling and picks the phone up by the second ring when you call to tell her you got there.
When she throws the underwear out with the rip in them because she doesn't want you to go out like that.
The way she takes care of you when you are sick

You will know... they let you know

The real thing, seems to be very rare.

Genuine friendships with valuable people come along periodically. Crushes and fascinations can be like rainstorms in springtime.

But real love, of the kind which lasts, and which is aware of your faults, and cares for you right along as you stumble through all manner of travails, is so uncommon, that whole societies of people like us often construct extensive and elaborate explanations for why the people we don't love are unsatisfactory, and why we wont accept this or that person's desires or frailties or physical limitations.

I know less what love is, than what signals that it isn't there. When the person who you hoped would care always seems to be holding a stopwatch on you; when nothing you do is appreciated, and most of what you do is criticized; when testy silence replaces the simple moments of communication; when long periods of time out of sight occur, and the person only halfway returns, and are distracted and distant. I know that sort of thing all too well.

What love is, more than anything else, is when the person who you love, and who loves you, just quietly shapes each small decision of their lives around being with you. Where the thousands of tiny adjustments most of us make to ourselves to make allowances for the rest of existence, are all designed specifically for the other person, and the fact that we are able to make those adjustments to ourselves, isn't a bother; it's what makes our lives feel good to us, and makes us proud of ourselves.