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| Topic: Muscle vs Weight | |
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True, and while I'm brand new at this online dating stuff, I have been around women most of my life, and think "falsifying" one's self is a recipe for disaster. What happens when one actually meet someone they like? (as recently happened to me, yay!
 ) and they has to live up to all the BS they posted about themselves? I don't see it ending well.
Back on topic, I think, if someone's actually offended because they don't possess a certain feature you like it's their problem, not yours. |
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Edited by
TMommy
on
Sat 06/13/15 08:25 AM
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Agree
you will not be everyone's cup tea and they will not be yours  you met someone you like already?awww that's great see I knew you weren't too rough around edges 
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Who me? Haahaaa oh hell no woman I say what I want let chips.fall.where they may 
That's what I figured :) 
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I agree with SuzQ. Sure you can fancy certain things, but that doesn't mean you can't be seriously attracted to someone who hasn't got those features. But .. in general I really don't feel attracted to someone who's seriously overweight. A few extra pounds don't bother me, but really fat... Too skinny, I'd be afraid he'd break ... And I've learnt that a man with very thin legs, not a muscle to be seen, puts me off. Too much muscle doesn't appeal to me either, like those over the top trained steroid body builder muscles. I prefer more natural looking muscles And he can be a regular Adonis, totally 'my type' etc.. but if he's shorter than me, it's not going to work. That's not a mental decision, just doesn't work. Hmmmmmm.....checking....checking.....looks like I fit your criteria.  
I think you do indeed  And you got a southern drawl to top if off ... 
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True, and while I'm brand new at this online dating stuff, I have been around women most of my life, and think "falsifying" one's self is a recipe for disaster. What happens when one actually meet someone they like? (as recently happened to me, yay! ) and they has to live up to all the BS they posted about themselves? I don't see it ending well.
Back on topic, I think, if someone's actually offended because they don't possess a certain feature you like it's their problem, not yours. Absolutely agree with this. Why stab yourself in the neck. Life is hard enough with out self inflicted. PS Congrats on the personal front. |
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Thank you PacificStar, but I find myself in need of more womanly advice. I just can't figure some things out. You have been such a HUGE asset so far, and I would greatly value your input again. If it's OK with you I've sent you a message.
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Again, I am uncertain exactly what you mean. I am very concerned about my own weight and muscles. It inhibits me often. As for others, it's quite simple: it doesn't matter how much I may or may not idealize someone's character, personality, or skills. Attraction is, as always, governed by responses out of my control. I can indeed choose NOT to act every time I am attracted, but I cannot choose to BECOME attracted if I am not so, naturally. When I read this the first thing I think of is women. Women are very concerned about the number on the scale typically. Some of the most fit women you will are fitness models (thing of those personal trainer videos). These women are typically small, in shape, and probably high teens body fat which is low for women. The way you achieve that is with weight lifting. The thing is when other women start to workout like them they don't actually take measurements but use the scale. When changing your body composition it is possible to actually gain weight but be smaller. Especially if you had very low muscle mass, high body fat, but at an average weight. Then they freak out because their weight went up. |
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Could be because nowadays ya.get bashed for being honest for instance if I said I prefer dating man at least my height or taller I run risk of offending any man less than 5ft10. If I say I prefer man with well groomed facial hair?clean shaven men might get miffy If I say that a few extra pounds do not bother me but I would prefer someone who is not morbidly obese because of health issues that often accompany it and because I am physically active this opens me up to being called a chubby hater which would be ridiculous since my ex husband was almost 400 lbs before his gastric bypass  chubby hater!
effin hilarious! |
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With billions of adults struggling with muscle versus weight how truly important to you is it when getting in being being in a relationship? How do you think having too little just right or too much of either really matters and why? Please be respectful. In a relationship, not important at all. Some desires presence of some thing special in their partners OR some thing absent. They are often disappointed as Human beings come in unique packages; greatly contributed by genes and socially acquired traits. |
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I too have difficulty defining my "type" of man. There are certain physical aspects that will draw my eye every time, but if all that person draws is my eye... I've met people and not had an immediate physical reaction, but after getting to know them found them extremely attractive. Very true for me also, it takes me a few dates/conversations to actually realize if i'm attracted to a guy or not, looks are not really important but i guess there has to be some initial attraction there for me in the first instance, personality always wins everytime |
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With billions of adults struggling with muscle versus weight how truly important to you is it when getting in being being in a relationship? How do you think having too little just right or too much of either really matters and why? Please be respectful. A little either way isn't even going to be 'noticed' by me if I am into him...He is the "sum" of his parts and that is why I'm with him...In my world, muscle vs weight speaks way more about good health than physical attraction...I'm health conscious, so naturally I am going to be more attracted to a man who is the same...Everything just works better that way ...I relate it to smoking...As a reformed smoker for many years now, his smoking would be a problem mostly because I would be tempted to join him ...As for his physique, I want to savor every part of him and I want the same reaction when he is partaking of my body...That does not mean perfect bodies, it means perfect in our eyes ...I'm quite happy to work at keeping fit if it makes my man happy because if he's happy I'm going to be happy...I think body confidence is sexy....
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I think the older we get the more we focus on mental and less on physical. It doesn't mean that looks don't count, but I do believe they don't count as much.
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I think the older we get the more we focus on mental and less on physical. It doesn't mean that looks don't count, but I do believe they don't count as much. Agree 100%.... |
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Thank you PacificStar, but I find myself in need of more womanly advice. I just can't figure some things out. You have been such a HUGE asset so far, and I would greatly value your input again. If it's OK with you I've sent you a message. Of course any time. |
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