My brain's starting to hurt again. I won't do the finger in the eye thing again though.

First of all, keep a smile on your face. That will make your chances of meeting someone alot better. Second, hold out for someone that you can really talk too comfortably before even considering a relationship. Don't put too much stock in appearance. The last thing you need right now is another broken heart. Seek the one who smiles most, their heart will be as warm as toast ! Avoid men who don't look you in the eye when they talk to you, most of what they say is not true. Do not be with a person because your lonley, be only with a person you respect and admire for his heart and honesty. Don't look back, and keep smileing, and a good man will find you, and when he does, he will remove all of that pain. If you drink, now would be a good time to take a break from it. Alcohol and saddness really don't mix into anything positive. Get out there and advertise the the most beautiful smile you can muster up, and everything will fall into place. Your going to be fine. If you must dwell on something, dwell on the positive things in your life that your thankful for, and avoid all negetive thoughts whenever possible. Try persueing a hobby that you always wanted to give a shot, or may be interested in. Join a club, or activity group, lots of people to meet there as well. Above all, smile at everyone you make eye contact with, most will smile back, and that in itself is very uplifting. There are alot of wonderful caring people out there who would love to be part of your life.

Hello everyone I just join tonight and this is the first topic I have read and like most here it sounds like we are just left a relationship. It's been 7 months. For the most part it was a good relationship but there was alot of off and on's during the 10 years.This last one was the straw that broke the camels back he made me choose between him and my two little grandkids. Even though I fully understand his side of it I still could not choose him over them. They needed me cause at their ages they had already went though to much in the young little lifes.I am here to meet people of both sex for friends. and if perhaps I meet a nice man while here that will be good too!

exactly by the way you are ....... right here, meeting new people

I think you start, by discovering you.

Learning all your likes and dislikes, all the fun things you used to love doing...

Taking slow walks, smelling flowers, jumping in puddles, looooooong baths, cooking elaborate meals of all YOUR favourite foods...and sitting in your undies with your feet up on the table burping, if that's what you want to do!!!

(Ok, so I wasn't allowed to burp for 18 years... )

Learn you, so someone can earn you!

Just put yourself out there and interact with others, make friends, learn new things or come hang with Jess and I. Warning, we might corrupt you! haha

I have NEVER been married myself but my ex and I split after 5 years and I swear the world was over. It didn't help the butt head decided to end our relationship 2 days after our second child was born. But anyway....

Its been almost 3 years since we have been a couple and I am learning more about myself by being single than being in a relationship. It is still hard to get out there and date but I'm trying.

Best advice...just make the friends and worry about the dating later :)

NEW friends welcome here for me as well :)

i was separated for two years now divorced for three..it took me a year after my divorce to start dating again

this is all great advise. thank you. i don't feel like i need to get over him(my ex)but i need to get over the lost marriage. does that make any sense to anyone?i was so unhappy for so long, and thats just how he wanted it. if he was miserible he had to have me that way too. and im not willing to live like that any longer.im not going to let him do that to me agian. i don't miss him i miss the companionship.

moving on it's always the only answer
i can't be holding a moment, a period of time, or a person.
I just don't have time
just keep moving and moving

Welcome to JSH and you're doing great getting into it!!

well you could always take up reading for a hobby

take some time to be centered and feel good about yourself

enjoy the journey

For me...I had to take a deep breath and forgive. Not for him but for me. That was my first step anyways....

Yeah I'm new to this place as well. I hope it's not like myspace where it's cool for like a day. But anyway, I was divorced back in February after 5yrs. I am only 24 yrs old, but I hate lectures from people. I just want to say hi to everyone here. I suppose I should post in the introduction area huh? Ok, will do.

Hey Steph...try taking those first few steps after 22 yrs. of marriage. Everyone on here is right one way or another. I am so loaded with guilt of what I've done with mine, but I looked back at what I did, and realized, hey it could've worked, she just wasn't willing to go the extra mile. To much history to explain. But anyways, I have gone to other dating sites, and so far, this is the one I have found where people accept you for who you are and for the now. It doesn't matter what happened in the past or what happened in the marriage, you can't fix it, it's in the past. You try to go forward and live for the day and take in one day at a time and tell yourself I am me and I am number. Always think positive. Sometimes it's hard to do, but you will start realizing it before long. This site has helped tremendously, not so much as the dating thingy, but to express myself with my poetry and writings. It has set me free once again to be able to get inspired. The friends I have made, don't realize it, but it has brought back inspiration where inspiration was lost. Welcome to the site, and thanks to everyone as well.

((((madam))))
You just got BUMPED!!!

Just divorced after twleve years.
Believe me it isnt easy. Take
your time. I dont think I will
ever love or trust agian. You get
right back into the games.

It is so hard to move on when something important to you ends, or when someone that meant the world to you goes away. I feel for you.

There are all sorts of things you can do to make it a little easier on yourself in the meantime - to help you cope. But really, the only thing that really works is....

the passage of time. That, and maintaining Faith, Hope, and an open heart.

Love & Light,
angelfire