Topic: Questions
smartwithsparks's photo
Fri 02/20/15 09:23 PM


Depends what the questions are? If I'm comfortable answering them then it's fine, but if they really start getting too personal, I want to know why they're asking me those questions straight away?


This is exactly what I was thinking. I had a date the other night that did that to me and I was very curious as to why he was drilling me with personal questions. That was the last date with him!


That is exactly what I'm talking about..
I don't like asking a lot of questions.
I wouldn't feel comfortable being asked some questions
And too many questions are a red flag..
I guess,I get uncomfortable answering a lot of questions
Nor would I feel comfortable ,invading someone's privacy.
You might have a couple dates and never see them again,,,lol

Totage's photo
Fri 02/20/15 10:34 PM



Depends what the questions are? If I'm comfortable answering them then it's fine, but if they really start getting too personal, I want to know why they're asking me those questions straight away?


So, you would not have any interest in participating in my next survey?
Depends what the survey is about Totage?


I know. lol, I do surveys for one of my websites which is an online health shop. Some of the questions are personal so that we can gain a better understanding of our customers and their needs. The surveys are anonymous though, so no personally identifiable data is collected, just the data needed to make the best business decisions based on our customer needs.

dnewnew's photo
Sun 02/22/15 12:38 PM
Well, going to the first meet with someone you met on OLD is a little bit like a job interview: the profiles are like resumes & you are both interviewing each other for the "job" of being a b/f or g/f. That involves a fair amount of questions.

If you can't provide specifics on jobs listed on your resume, or references: any employer would become suspicious & not offer you the job. Same thing applies in OLD. If you profile states you're looking for marriage & want to have kids, but in the meeting you don't answer his questions about "how long do you think you should date before marriage" or "how many kids do you think you want" - that sends red flags to him. Same as if a girl is asking you about a certain type of music or hobby you listed & you evade/give vague answers: she will think you were not telling the truth in your profile.

Now asking things like where do you live & wanting the exact address or the address of your job or exactly how many people live with you & when are they home: THOSE are red flags LOL! If you are divorced - it's never appropriate to bring it up or to ask about the other person's divorce on the first meet.

Asking more probing questions about what a person listed in their profile: that's just the way we figure out if we want a 2nd date with the other person (unless the physical attraction is so great it overrules good sense, which often happens). Of course the profiles matter too: if there are no common interests - why bother messaging the person or replying to a message in the first place (again, it's often just based on looks), so you don't wind up on a date with someone who's going to ask a lot of questions just because there's nothing you have in common to talk about...

Cutiepieforyou's photo
Sun 02/22/15 12:45 PM



Depends what the questions are? If I'm comfortable answering them then it's fine, but if they really start getting too personal, I want to know why they're asking me those questions straight away?


This is exactly what I was thinking. I had a date the other night that did that to me and I was very curious as to why he was drilling me with personal questions. That was the last date with him!


That is exactly what I'm talking about..
I don't like asking a lot of questions.
I wouldn't feel comfortable being asked some questions
And too many questions are a red flag..
I guess,I get uncomfortable answering a lot of questions
Nor would I feel comfortable ,invading someone's privacy.
You might have a couple dates and never see them again,,,lol



I don't feel comfortable asking a date a lot of information at first either. This is the second time this has happened to me with two different men. I find someone asking me too many personal questions, on the first date, to be invasive.ohwell :wink:


Zuglo65's photo
Sun 02/22/15 02:28 PM
Hm..I always thought if she isn't asking lots of questions, she is not all that interested.
Course not too personal questions, just general ones.

no1phD's photo
Sun 02/22/15 03:08 PM

Is It normal to Ask questions Of people You Havent Met??
I dont like to Ask questions..
Do Others ??
.. better a stupid question then a stupid mistake.. so my grandfather used to say...

. and if you don't ask questions.. how are you going to ever know what they like or don't like..... for instance..
. okay you just let me know... when this begins to hurt....

.... are how does this feel..
.. do you like it when I do this or that..
... would you prefer to roll over on your back or your stomach..
...... if you're laying on your side does it feel better..
.... you don't have to put it all in at once...

.... its okay if you don't like the taste you can spit it out...lol..

... okay that last one wasn't really a question.. more of the gauging of your personal preference...oops

.

smartwithsparks's photo
Mon 02/23/15 07:23 AM




Depends what the questions are? If I'm comfortable answering them then it's fine, but if they really start getting too personal, I want to know why they're asking me those questions straight away?


This is exactly what I was thinking. I had a date the other night that did that to me and I was very curious as to why he was drilling me with personal questions. That was the last date with him!


That is exactly what I'm talking about..
I don't like asking a lot of questions.
I wouldn't feel comfortable being asked some questions
And too many questions are a red flag..
I guess,I get uncomfortable answering a lot of questions
Nor would I feel comfortable ,invading someone's privacy.
You might have a couple dates and never see them again,,,lol



I don't feel comfortable asking a date a lot of information at first either. This is the second time this has happened to me with two different men. I find someone asking me too many personal questions, on the first date, to be invasive.ohwell :wink:




invasive was on point..

no photo
Mon 02/23/15 07:31 AM
The only question I ever ask is a simple one.
What cup size are you?

I don't know why women get offended at thatohwell

smartwithsparks's photo
Mon 02/23/15 07:48 AM

The only question I ever ask is a simple one.
What cup size are you?

I don't know why women get offended at thatohwell


and hows that workin for ya

no photo
Mon 02/23/15 08:18 AM


The only question I ever ask is a simple one.
What cup size are you?

I don't know why women get offended at thatohwell


and hows that workin for ya

Not very well to be honest. I've been called things I didn't even know existed

mysticalview21's photo
Mon 02/23/15 08:32 AM
Edited by mysticalview21 on Mon 02/23/15 08:33 AM
sparks... I have heard know ... but I feel if someone can not communicate
with you ... then they can not do that in person either... what is most important in a relationship ...some have said communication ... and that is very true... and if they can not do that... I would just say move on because they are hiding something ...in a new relationship already ...

smartwithsparks's photo
Mon 02/23/15 09:26 AM

sparks... I have heard know ... but I feel if someone can not communicate
with you ... then they can not do that in person either... what is most important in a relationship ...some have said communication ... and that is very true... and if they can not do that... I would just say move on because they are hiding something ...in a new relationship already ...


:heart:

DadCat's photo
Sun 03/01/15 04:59 PM
Edited by DadCat on Sun 03/01/15 04:59 PM

Depends what the questions are? If I'm comfortable answering them then it's fine, but if they really start getting too personal, I want to know why they're asking me those questions straight away?



This is exactly what I was thinking. I had a date the other night that did that to me and I was very curious as to why he was drilling me with personal questions. That was the last date with him!



Kind of hard to get to know someone if you don't ask questions...



...
And too many questions are a red flag..
I guess,I get uncomfortable answering a lot of questions
Nor would I feel comfortable ,invading someone's privacy.
...


What each of you should realize from your own words is that there is a subjective line between invasive and curious. OLD is a place of many risks and we should be asking important questions to be sure we are safe.


Hm..I always thought if she isn't asking lots of questions, she is not all that interested.
Course not too personal questions, just general ones.


I have an agreement with these words as a genuine interest in someone does entail conversation. And a conversations naturally leads to questions. Again, there is a subjective 'line' being drawn that is your choice and may not be something the other partner is understanding.

My Etiquette:

I believe if you are asked a question which is inappropriate for you it means you have not developed enough trust with the other person. I believe trust is the basis for any relationship (parent, child, lover, etc.).

You should be able to politely tell the inquisitor that you are not ready to answer a particular question. If there is persistence, then yes, that is a red flag and you should tell them it is not acceptable. I presume that if you have progressed to a face to face meeting on Skype or in person, you have developed a level of trust, right?

I do this politely to anyone sending me a request to join them on Skype or send them email directly. I will not necessarily presume they are looking to scam me. If they continue to exchange letters through mingle, then I have found someone display a level of respect worthy of my continued attention and correspondence.

bye now...




no photo
Sun 03/01/15 05:33 PM

Is It normal to Ask questions Of people You Havent Met??
I dont like to Ask questions..
Do Others ??


On a site like this? Yes.

no1phD's photo
Sun 03/01/15 05:51 PM
ask me no questions I'll tell you no lies.. diddly diddly Doo..lol

no photo
Mon 03/02/15 12:14 AM
... ask the right questions... and i'll tell you... doodly doodly daa... :angel:
:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Mon 03/02/15 02:49 AM
Edited by SparklingCrystal 💖💎 on Mon 03/02/15 02:50 AM
I think a lot of ppl got in a rut of sorts when they're have been on dating-sites for a long time? I've noticed a lot of men (don't know about women) aren't interested in a normal conversation. They seem to feel it's okay to bombard you with questions. I think they want to establish with the minimum 'waste' of time whether you could be a possible match or not. Whether you're worth their time and attention. Kind of like it's simply a meat market.

Typically these men get PO when you raise the issue and tell them you don't like to be interrogated, but prefer a normal conversation. And after being PO, they're gone, off to the next target. And typically they won't tell you anything about themselves. They will answer your questions, but that doesn't make for a nice 'get to know each other' conversation.

I think they've been through so many 'conversations' online that they simply can't be @r$ed to approach you in a normal fashion. They don't want to waste time, first want to know whether you're worth it.

Really a stupid MO. You wouldn't use it in a pub or other social gathering would you?

Most popular questions:
- How long have you been on this site? (none of your ****ing business!)
- Do you date often (none of your ****ing business!)
- What are you looking for. (Errr... a bloke that doesn't ask this many questions for starters!)

Always rattles my cage. Reminds me of The Who, "Who are you, who the f**k are you!!!" ---> "Who the feck do you think you are, interrogating me like that?!"

no photo
Mon 03/02/15 03:00 AM

I think a lot of ppl got in a rut of sorts when they're have been on dating-sites for a long time? I've noticed a lot of men (don't know about women) aren't interested in a normal conversation. They seem to feel it's okay to bombard you with questions. I think they want to establish with the minimum 'waste' of time whether you could be a possible match or not. Whether you're worth their time and attention. Kind of like it's simply a meat market.

Typically these men get PO when you raise the issue and tell them you don't like to be interrogated, but prefer a normal conversation. And after being PO, they're gone, off to the next target. And typically they won't tell you anything about themselves. They will answer your questions, but that doesn't make for a nice 'get to know each other' conversation.

I think they've been through so many 'conversations' online that they simply can't be @r$ed to approach you in a normal fashion. They don't want to waste time, first want to know whether you're worth it.

Really a stupid MO. You wouldn't use it in a pub or other social gathering would you?

Most popular questions:
- How long have you been on this site? (none of your ****ing business!)
- Do you date often (none of your ****ing business!)
- What are you looking for. (Errr... a bloke that doesn't ask this many questions for starters!)

Always rattles my cage. Reminds me of The Who, "Who are you, who the f**k are you!!!" ---> "Who the feck do you think you are, interrogating me like that?!"


Or Armand Van Helden "What is my problem with man, you ask? No, I ask you what was Man's problem with me?" from "U don't know me"

ridewytepony's photo
Mon 03/02/15 03:11 AM




Depends what the questions are? If I'm comfortable answering them then it's fine, but if they really start getting too personal, I want to know why they're asking me those questions straight away?


So, you would not have any interest in participating in my next survey?
Depends what the survey is about Totage?


I know. lol, I do surveys for one of my websites which is an online health shop. Some of the questions are personal so that we can gain a better understanding of our customers and their needs. The surveys are anonymous though, so no personally identifiable data is collected, just the data needed to make the best business decisions based on our customer needs.

Wh-Wha-What! my libido is fine! how the hell is yours!:angry:

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Mon 03/02/15 03:14 AM


I think a lot of ppl got in a rut of sorts when they're have been on dating-sites for a long time? I've noticed a lot of men (don't know about women) aren't interested in a normal conversation. They seem to feel it's okay to bombard you with questions. I think they want to establish with the minimum 'waste' of time whether you could be a possible match or not. Whether you're worth their time and attention. Kind of like it's simply a meat market.

Typically these men get PO when you raise the issue and tell them you don't like to be interrogated, but prefer a normal conversation. And after being PO, they're gone, off to the next target. And typically they won't tell you anything about themselves. They will answer your questions, but that doesn't make for a nice 'get to know each other' conversation.

I think they've been through so many 'conversations' online that they simply can't be @r$ed to approach you in a normal fashion. They don't want to waste time, first want to know whether you're worth it.

Really a stupid MO. You wouldn't use it in a pub or other social gathering would you?

Most popular questions:
- How long have you been on this site? (none of your ****ing business!)
- Do you date often (none of your ****ing business!)
- What are you looking for. (Errr... a bloke that doesn't ask this many questions for starters!)

Always rattles my cage. Reminds me of The Who, "Who are you, who the f**k are you!!!" ---> "Who the feck do you think you are, interrogating me like that?!"


Or Armand Van Helden "What is my problem with man, you ask? No, I ask you what was Man's problem with me?" from "U don't know me"

The answer is "The Big Bad Wolf"

Apart from that, I enjoy chats with men that do have social skills and enjoy talking with a woman :)