HI EVERYONE
I HAVENT POSTED IN AWHILE AND IM HAVING SOME SERIOUS ISSUES AT THE MOMENT AND NEEDED SOME INPUT FROM MY FRIENDS HERE.... IM GOING TO TRY TO SPARE THE DRAMA HERES THE ISSUE:I HAVE AN EX WHO I WENT WITH FOR 5YRS, WE BROKE UP IN 2005 BECAUSE ONCE I MOVED IN WITH HIM HE BEAT ME CONSTANTLY , SO I LEFT. YES GOOD FOR ME THEN I STARTED TALKING TO HIM AGAIN WE TALKED ABOUT WHAT HE USE TO DO TO ME AND SAID HE CHANGED SO I WENT TO SEE HIM FOR THREE DAYS HAD A GREAT TIME THIS WAS LAST MONTH... THEN ON TUESDAY HE GOT REALLY ANGRY ON THE PHONE LIKE HE USED TO GET BEFORE HED BEAT ME AND IT SCARED THE CRAP OUT OF ME AND I STARTED CRYING. HE ALSO SAID HE HAD PLANS FOR ME THAT I DONT KNOW ABOUT, NOT SURE WHAT THAT MEANT I THOUGHT ABOUT GETTING BACK TOGETHER WITH HIM BUT AFTER THAT EPSOIDE OVER THE PHONE IM NOT SO SURE, SO HERES THE QUESTION : CAN GUYS REALLY CHANGE AND IF THEY CAN HOW LONG DO I GIVE HIM? IN ADVANCE THANKS FOR THE HELP

certainly ppl can change, but it takes time and determination. Sounds to me like the gentleman named has an anger management problem. My personal advice to you would be stay a long ways away from him, make him prove that he has his anger under control. Do not fall into the abused woman syndrome where you just keep going back for more. Too many guys out there who would appreciate you and treat you like the queen that you are

people can change but be patient and careful

I changed, but It was my choice and it took a lot of work to do so. As sad as it seems, if he is showing no progress in trying to change, he probably won't.

THANKS MARK N WILLY, YEA HE KEEPS PRESSING ME ABOUT VISITING AGAIN IM JUST NOT SO SURE

His plans for you could be bad, dont forget about that, woman fall for this really easy.

"fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me"..most sayings tend to have a basis in fact...think about it

yes you are right burg thanks for the advice i need to be reminded sometimes

anytime gc

hitting is wrong, please don't take the chance
he may have changed...
but is your life worth taking the chance to find out???

please be careful

im sorry but id say dont think twice about taking him back, i despise guys who hit women they should be castrated!!!

with what he said you would be mad to even speak to him again, dont let him run your life, get rid of him while you still can

i agweee

must be carefulll!!!!!

after the last comment he made about his plans for you, the best thing you can do is get a restraining order against him for stsrters

This is said from personal experience.
He won't change
Don't walk away
Run

okay
I read your post again

and my advice is
no he hasn't changed
as for the plans he has, I bet they aren't anything good

If I was you I would get the h*ll away from the guy
as fast as I could...

I wouldn't talk to him again...

Cut him off at the knees
and RUN!!!!!!!!

I agree with Willy Cents, people can change, but that fact doesn’t necessarily mean that they have just because they claim to have changed.

If you’re ex boyfriend become irate on the phone then it’s pretty clear that he still has anger management issues. It’s highly unlikely that he has changed in light of this behavior.

If you feel threatened and uncertain then back away! Don’t allow it to progress. If he shows any anger or hostility toward your desire to pull back then he clearly still has problems thus proving that you’ve made the right move.

“THANKS MARK N WILLY, YEA HE KEEPS PRESSING ME ABOUT VISITING AGAIN IM JUST NOT SO SURE”

If he’s “pressing” then he clearly has control issues yet. There’s nothing to be sure about. Just say no, you’re no longer interested. If he becomes irate about that then he’s just verifying that your suspicions are true.

"I wouldn't talk to him again...

Cut him off at the knees
and RUN!!!!!!!!"

Good advice.

People can change but they have to want to. Most people are set in their ways and won't change.

I was in a similar situation but it was never physical. I was on and off with my ex for about 3 years. I kept breaking up with him because he didn't have goals and plans for the future. He was 32 and has been living with his mom atleast 4 years now since he moved back to Texas after he got a divorce. He always said he'd change.. he got another job said he was saving up for his own place and was going to move out soon. The last time we got back together for about two months, but nothing had changed. I started having doubts when he told me to shut up in front of my mother after I kept telling him to apoligize for saying something mean to me. I really knew it was over when about a week later I had been sick and didn't talk to him for a day and a half. He was coming over on Friday afternoon but I didn't hear my phone go off in my purse. When he got to my house, he asked me to come outside, I thought it was because maybe I was getting flowers or something cause I was sick, but no, he decides he wants to b*tch to me about not answering my phone and then ended up calling a b*tch.

No one needs to be with someone that's going to physically harm them or who degrades them in any way. My opinion is don't put yourself in that situation again. Next time it come be much worse.. you hear horror stories all the time.

Baby girl, pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase don't do that. That is what killed my older sister. Her abusive boyfriend asked her back, and she went to his house that night. That was the last time anyone ever saw her alive again.I'm begging you, please don't even consider it. If he'll hit you, then he will have no bones about killing you. Trust me! NO, ABUSERS DON'T CHANGE, THEY ARE ALWAYS ABUSERS. THE CAN FOOL YOU LONG ENOUGH TO GET YOU RIGHT WHERE THEY WANT YOU SO THEY CAN ABUSE YOU OR KILL YOU. Please sweetheart, for your sake and the sake of your family's hearts, dooooon't go back.

I don't get it, I have never hit and only been kind to women my life and I can't find a women to save my life. The there is this man that has beaten women might get a girl.....Some of you women really like the BAD BOY don't you???????????? Enough about me.


Remember the old saying fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me....................

I don't even understand how anyone could look a person in the eye that beat them??????? Man love is stupid sometimes,,,,,