Could this be more true?

FAKE Friends: Never ask for food.
REAL Friends: Are the reason you never have food.

FAKE Friends: Call your parents "Mr." / "Mrs."
REAL Friends: Call your parents "Dad" / "Mom".

FAKE Friends: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was
wrong.
REAL Friends: Would sit next to you in jail saying, "Damn ... We fucked
up...But that shit was fun! Let's do it again!"

FAKE Friends: Never seen you cry.
REAL Friends: Cry with you.

FAKE Friends: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAL Friends: Keep your shit so long they forget it's yours.

FAKE Friends: Know a few things about you.
REAL Friends: Could write a book about all the skeletons you keep in
your closet, using direct quotes from you.

FAKE Friends: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
REAL Friends: Will kick the whole crowd's ass that left you.

FAKE Friends: Would knock on your front door.
REAL Friends: Walk right in and say, "I'MMMM HOOOOMMMME!!!"

FAKE Friends: Are for awhile.
REAL Friends: Are for life.

FAKE Friends: Will take your drink away when they think you've had
enough.
REAL Friends: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say,
"Bitch, drink the rest of that - you know we don't waste shit!"

FAKE Friends: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
REAL Friends: Will knock them the fuck out. Period.

that's a good list but it's not all true

Maybe not alll true.BUT most of it. Real friends wont stab u iin the
back. And I lve by most of what he said.

Ok, I will admit that MOST is true. *smiles*

i do like the real friend part to drinking though. i can remember times
like that and then listening to them puke all over the neighborhood

Okay I think all of it true lol my true friends are like that

True enough!

i like it man i really need that laugh. But on a serious note i agree
with the rest not all of it is true, most of it is but not all, but i
really think that as in your post if some one is talking shit behind
your back to one of your friends and they "knock them the fuck out" then
you really do have a true friend.

I couldn't agree more, Mitch!

thats the stuff man .i know when theres a party foul (spilled
drink)everyone cries alchohol abuse.

LMAOOOOO

A real friend might take your keys off of you, pour you another drink
but then in the end they're the ones who'll hold your hair out of the
toilet while you search for RAAALLLLLPPPPHHHHH ! !
I don't have many friends who are that real but since I don't have any
hair it's not a big deal right? ROTLMFAOPIMP