I kind of agree with the part of not wanting to lose a great friendship if the relationship didn't work...I realize this is pessimistic and it is dooming any chances for it to work simply by letting fear rule, when in reality there is probbly a really good chance that it would work if it were allowed to Follow it's natural course. ...

well put puffins

we don't want to be hurt.. having to deal with those emotions when there's SOOO much going on in the REAL world around MOST of us, that it's hard just to 'let go' and jump in.. in my case.. I want to be friends FIRST.. and building a friendship that will LAST takes time.. you can't become INSTANT FRIENDS.. lifes just not LIKE that.. I also feel there are 'steps' to the process.. exchanging email banter.. leading to telephone conversations.. getting to REALLY KNOW the other person and discovering if they are a REAL contender as a life partner..

but you're rite genuine.. if friendship DOES work well AND there's chemistry.. then yes.. the next likely step is to move it forward.. but in TIME.. genuine.. you've ONLY been here a few short WEEKS.. have patience.. what WILL be.. WILL!!

if you like a person THAT much.. then you'll respect HER feelings AND her time schedule.. no sense getting yer panties in a knot over something you CAN'T control.. the OTHER persons feelings..

but that's just MY opinion

Like Zero's use of the word "CONTROL".
I learned, we "GUYS" tend to like to be in control. Little will ruin a relationship quicker than trying to take control.
When I learned "the only thing I can control is ME." The world & my relationship with my wife took a fantastic turn for the better.

Why do I always seem to learn things the hard way?
Could it be there was a major shift in thinking, in the 70's?
Me thinks we need to keep learning & be open to different ideas.

yes sage.. things HAVE changed since the '70s.. many women have more control over their own destiny/live's.. we are more open and willing to do what we MUST to achieve our goals.. and speak out about them openly as well.. circumstances have forced us in many cases to fight for ourSELVES not having a 'partner' to lean on and 'wear the pants' I feel I am equal to any man.. not in an arrogant way.. just feel I can do whatEVER they can pretty much ANd just as good..
it's not that we want to be BETTER then men.. NO.. we just want to be RESPECTED as an equal.. and I feel that FRIENDship is where the 'common' groundwork is laid!

Friendship is where it all begins...