I lost people I cared about and I didnt deal with it very well

Well i guess since we can't turn back time, what we need to do is to live life the most for our good and think that there's always time and place for everything and God set all things to happen according to his purpose. ^_^

you only live once
and to live means to move forward
and if you try hold on to someone
ur holding urself back
keep ur head up
trust me I know exactly whut u mean
I lost lots of my close loved ones
left and right and
I am moving on and forward cause I know its what they would want me too ~

My Christian faith sustained me when my wife died.

Time.
That is all that works.

Lost the family unit as a kid, sisters in foster care and me in a wackado church home, didn't see them again until a few years ago.

Along the way I learned you don't overthink it.
Having a little fashionable victimisation is great for working class folks, you can act all "woe is me" with an easy life and it's all very dramatic in conversation, without any real physical threat on your actions. It's all whimsy. It gets the chicks and for chicks makes them feel more on daddy's level.

When you actually have knife fights at the train station over simply hunting for food out of your territory it's kind of a different game.

You don't sit around overthinking a conversation for a psychologist. You discipline yourself and kick into survival gear. Then you do the next task. And so on.
Surprisingly, what you find is it's really not any kind of issue, assuming you maintain some regular social activities for general emotional health. Loved ones are an intellectual concept, familiarity comes from proximity and routine, you can set that up easy enough among strangers, trick your own instincts into feeling healthy and well adjusted.
It works. Most survival skills do.