Yes! He has a say too! So she wants to find out what to do because he SUGGESTS: "Let's get married now?" To prove he is man enough to take the challenge.
Amd she SUGGESTS: "Please let us wait?"
So that does not SHOW ANYONE is controlling the other or wants to. It shows that they both have a dicision to make.
I am sure you know that some people will study better when they are in love and happily married. That is why the Creator found out that "it is bad for humans to be lonely." So some of us shacked up early but we forget.

Grieving, the bug up the butt...change the record thread is that way>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

The next thing is she has at least four years again BEFORE she gets a degree or the first degree. Then she will be 22. You are saying 'wait until she is 22, but screw around in the meantime? Or just screw in the meantime with him. He might be in a religion that says that is wrong. So he wants to make it right. Ever thougt of that.
Lots of 18 year old lads and lasses who belong to Churches,get married every day and STILL pursue their degrees WHILE HAPPILY MARRIED.

Greiving!!!!
Dude you best read it agian my friend!!!
First off its her choice to marry or not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Your acting like its you shes talking about
If the girl doesnt want to get married then HEY!
She aint gonna get married!!
Secondly you dont know whats going through his mind!
Get let it go!!!!!
Bigsexy............

Ms Jesse! If I can UNDERSTAND your utterances or mumblings, I will be able to reply to you. ?????????

Yea strongman. It is his choice too. You sound like he has no say.
But I could see that YOU are looking for a prize. Why don't you then ask Jesse to marry you then every thing you suggest she and her friend tell you that you are controlling.?

Morethan...I say have a serious talk with him, both being honest with all your feelings.

BUT, if you aren't ready to get married, he should respect that, and if he really loves you, he will still be there when you are ready.

By the way, Who is the chairperson of this thread. Who is the person with the hammer.
I hope no one is acting like they are in charge except the initiator?

I heard a Preacher say this once and everybody believed him:
"A man gets married to the woman he is in love with WHEN he is READY to get married."
If he is willing to get married, SHE should respect that too. Then they two will hear each other's views with none controlling, and decide what to do.
The woman is asking opinion here, and some people already WANTS to CHAIN HER UP against man, and her young adult age. They already want to SPOIL HER TO GIVE HIM PROBLEMS.

Well HE is ready to get married BUT she stated that SHE is not ready...so if she isn't ready...the best thing for her to do is wait until she makes up her mind.
Everyone has to be ready to get married, they have to be on the same page or its not going to work. Obviously they are not on the same page.

ITS NOT EVEN A QUESTION, DONT GET MARRIED!!!!! YOU BETTER REALLY THINK THIS THROUGH AND HAVE A VERY LONG TALK WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND. BUT DONT GET MARRIED!!!! YOU WILL REGRET IT

Hahahahaha!!!!Dude!you make me laugh!
Sorry but your(((((PHSYCO))))!!!!!!
Hahahahaha!!!
Seriously if i had a daughter and someone with your view on this!!
Came to my door and told me she has to respect you because you (wanna)!!!!!!
marry you when she dont want too!!!
And then stand there and tell me(Even though)she doent want to marry you,!you still have a choice???????????
You best bring that hammer!!

Wait a minute here!! Regardless of is he's "ready" to get married or not the choice is still yours. No way in hell do you let somebody dictate to you when you'll make that kind of a commitment. If you want to persue your education and get that behind you before you take on even more responsibility then you do that. Follow your instincts!! They're obviously telling you what direction you need to go or you wouldn't have this inner turmoil.
As for Mr. Greiving's "theory" on all of this opinions are like a**holes and everybody's got one.
Follow your gut and go from there.

Yeabig! So quick you WANT to use a hammer to control me and your daughter to pound OUR heads into shape? lOOK I'm scard; my teeth ARE knocking.
Sadiepretty (or Sadistwhatever) A philosopher said to a LARGE believing audience that ANYTIME a person CANNOT explain themselves on a losing senseless point, THEY BEGIN TO USE FOUL LANGUAGE. What do you think about that?
Another one shouts!!!!!!: "Stop making that funny noise!!"

As I said before. The decision is for BOTH of them to make. It seems like some people find that it must ONLY be the female's decision.
Doesn't it show that she is thinking about WHAT to do?

She is obviously getting advice or threats from her parents.

This is a time when a youth gets an opportunity to SHOW BACKBONE and make their own decisions as a young adult.

I am NOT saying that she is CONTROLLING because she DOES NOT want to get registered. So why are some INSISTING that because he expresses his wish to get married, it means he is CONTROLLING?

IT shows how CHAINED UP some women are against men.

Do you think that he is not getting ADVICE from HIS parents too?
If they are devotees to a Christian Church, or planning to be, they will be getting ADVICE from the pulpit, TV or otherwise. Pastor Hagee,Dr. Myles Monroe, Benny Hinn; etc.

What do you think that advice is going to be or is? CORRECT. That ADVICE will be "If you two ARE HAVING SEX, as we are SURE you are, and WILL, get MARRIED! Otherwise you are living in sin and will not get ETERNAL LIFE." Now I am NOT saying that sex without registration (marriage) is a sin. That sex is the joining and THe Creator's marriage cerEmony. Deut: 21: 11-15; 1 Cor: 7:36. Some Devotees do not know that. But that is a next topic.

I have daughters who, being in Church piously, got married, (I did not have a say in the decision by the way) Afterwards they pursued their degree, got it, then one husband sped up his pursuit by going to school full time to finish his. then they take turns at going for more.
This lad is also directing her attention to the MANY temptations to have sex out there, but he doesn't WANT to have sex and not do what Society considers THE DECENT THING. That is a GOOD BOY. Why are some people bent on making him out to be a SCOUNDREL? I know why.

Anyhow, that 'Lad' is READY to get married (get hanged) where he will ONLY know WHAT IS marriage when he is going for a divorce (God forbids)and IF she is not ready and she takes jackass advice, SHE WILL LOSE A GOOD MAN because he will marry someone else. He is NOT GOING TO WAIT 4 YEARS to have sex, if the girl is SHOWING THAT she can not be an adult by doing the right thing. She will be showing that she is not READY to be brave (as an adult should be)yet.

And if he WANTS to be a 'Christian' and also HAVE SEX, with the nice ladies and temptatations out there, he is going to get married to someone else, AND SHE WILL HAVE LOST A GOOD MAN!!!

THE ARE PLENTY ADULT FEMALES RIGHT HERE THAT WILL SAY "HE IS A GOOD MAN. WHY DOESN'T HE ASK ME TO GET MARRIED? SHE'D BETTER TAKE HIM QUICK AND HOLD ON TIGHT."
While some are stretching and striving relentlessly, to make him a Scoundrel,evil,sinister,wicked,demon,OTHERS, including THE BLIND, are seeing, that he is Saint. Bah!!

I know however that WHEN SOME OF THESE ill advisors, SOBER UP, THEY WILL CRY like Blondie, in Dagwood comics to their Pastor in the bar or porno Site Webmaster from whom they LEARNT THEIR DOCTRINE: "BOOO HOOO HOO WHO!!" AND SAY THAT THEY ARE SORRY.
I have forgiven them in advance

Grieving she is an 18 year old....and in some cultures it may be fine to be married at 12, 14, 16, 18, whatever....but she is not in other cultures, she's in hers....


GET A LIFE, and while you are at it, therapy wouldn't go astray...you have some serious unresolved stuff going on there.

Take you meds, and call your therapist, please.

And I am SURPRISED AT Sadiej. She ALWAYS has GOOD, INTELLIGENT contributions.

OK...this is just MY opinion....

If you are already engaged, that must mean you are both in love with each other, so I don't understand..... WHAT'S THE RUSH?

You already said yes to him

And WHAT is HER culture? To sneak & SCREW around, without evidence or a commitment? Because not being married will not prevent an 18yr old from having sex. Every normal intelligent human being KNOWS THAT.
So you see who needs the medication and help? But I still love you, sick as you are, even thogh you won't dance with me, and you hate my guts. I will forever HOPE htat one day, you will come to me, hold my hand and say: "Greiving darling, LET'S DANCE??????"

?

morethanjust_janedoe

if you have to ask

then yer not ready

if yer not ready

don't do it