Not sure how many more ways I can say this. I don't have anything in common with someone 20 years younger. You can't seriously think someone who is 20 years younger has the same life experience as me. I could list pages of reasons of why that age difference wouldn't work for me. I do have to consider my public image as I do high profile volunteer work for the military and with kids. This would not be acceptable to be seen dating a younger man as well I would feel embarrassed. To me; it just feels creepy. As I said I am not stupid. I have met, spent time with these guys and they simply aren't mature enough for me. Hey; if it works for you by all means date who you want but I am simply not wasting my time with a younger man.

Gotta admit I'm somewhat surprised by some of the shallow arguments, like "many young men know the music I listened to back then".

It's not about knowing the same things, it's about having experienced things in life.

We can know what happened at Woodstock, we can simply look it up online. But unless you were actually there, you cannot really say what it was like, what it felt like.

This principle goes for deep things that one experiences in life as well.
Someone 20 years younger can never have the same life experience and wisdom that comes with it.
Apart from that, age defines how one deals with things, what one wants and needs in life etc.

If you feel okay with a much younger partner, nothing wrong with that. But we all are different.
To me such a relationship wouldn't feel like a mature relationship either, simply because you aren't equals. You can't be equals as you differ in experience too much.
I want a mature relationship with a mature man who understands life, the universe and everything the way I do. Meaning, not too much younger or older.
And the other side of things: if you are 20 years older, you cannot keep up with him. You can think/want/pretend you can, but get real! You honestly think you still can go clubbing till the wee hours of the morning?

Weird that no one seems to get the reality of what Navygirl is saying.
I totally agree.

I get what Navygirl is saying. I don't believe people who are 20 years in age difference have much in common either. I personally do not believe I would go 10 years either side of my age for someone to date. I feel the 10 year range is pretty safe in falling into the category of having things and life experiences in common.

I understand why you won't in your case. It makes sense

Shallow arguments? Are you kidding me? This is an example of a shallow argument..

Life experience is life experience..some go through more than others no matter what the age. Thats a fact. Who cares what you did at woodstock? I am 53 and didn't go to woodstock. If I was a man of 53 then how would I relate to you? People are interestting, I can learn from anyone and they can learn from me. I seriously dont want to meet my duplicate. A man of 60 could have spent his whole life living in one city and never went anywhere. I know a woman my age like that. She wouldn't be able to relate to the experiences I have had traveling.

Age has nothing to do with life experience. I want to move forward in life..learn and live in the moment..not the past. There is so much more to a relationship than just experiences anyways.

Not all young men want to go clubbing..scuba diving and nountain climbing. and there are many older men who are very active. Here we go stereotyping again.


To each is own and we all have the right to our own opinions

Thanks Crystal Fairy. Finally someone that gets it. Life experiences mean a lot to me and shape the person you are and you are correct that you gain wisdom from it. I like your example of Woodstock. There are many things I experienced in life where as the young man wasn't even born yet so how the hell can he have an understanding of what I went through. No matter what a 30 year went through in life; he still isn't going to understand what a 50 year is going through or understand. I recently have lost 4 friends that have died due to age related illness so I doubt that a 30 year old can relate to something age-related. I agree that there is little chance that we would be equals as I would always feel like a "mommy" figure to him. I also agree with what you said about clubbing. My 30 year old friends don't always go clubbing but when they do; they want to stay out until early morning and it is hard for a 50 year old to keep up. My last job I had two 30 year olds (male and female) felt that they shouldn't have to work Friday nights as that was party night. My friend works with dozens of 30 year olds as 911 dispatchers who party so much they can' make it to work; so the older workers need to cover their shifts. I couldn't relate to man that was in his 70s either. For example; both of us serving in the military wouldn't relate as 1) women were not allowed in combat roles, and 2) Terrorists threats were practically unheard of in his time. Also; is a 70 year old going to keep up with me? LOL Thanks for your input!!!

I would rather be with a man my age. It just doesn't seem to be in the stars for me. Yes I am defending a few mature younger men as I have met some and hate discriminating against age.

I find that most men my age aren't interested in women my age and alot of them on these sites play games. I was on another site for quite awhile and would message men my age with no response. I seemed to be attracting the younger ones.

Sadly I've become bitter towards men my age. I have known this one man whos 49 for over 3 yrs now. Hes been honet from the start [NSA] and thats fine but he messed with my heart and played the game catch an release giving me hope then pushing me away. I don't want to get into the psychodrama of why..it is what it is and wont be seeing him anymore.

I'm thinking about giving this other man a chance..hes 33 and I have known him for over a year..I have been pushing him away because of his age. I just see such a difference in these 2 men and the younger has no problem commiting and hes got things figured out in his life. We do have common interests and like doing the same things. Its difficult

I'm not sure why I feel the need to share this. Maybe other older women are experiencing the same..just venting..I'm sick today with a bad cold and bored in bed lol

Thanks for sharing Cuddlebunny. Good luck with the young guy, since the other one didn't work. Been there, done that too. Hope you're feeling better very soon!

I am sorry to hear that men your age are messing with you. To be honest; there lots of messed up people these days which is why I can't be bothered to date. I wish you luck with your guy and I hope you feel well soon.

Thankyou Navygirl. I have wanted to throw in the towel myself, probably still will

It's sad that we have to do that, eh? I just focus my energy on other things like volunteer work and spending time with my friends/family. I also enjoy new challenges and right now working on some school courses.

When it comes to this site it makes sense, because the people they think i may be interested in are regularly in their 50s??? Maybe Mingle is trying to tell me something. I dunno, lol.

Is not all young men are like that for me forinstance i i was dating a young girl like my age i did everything for her unfortunately she move to settle with my best friend so told my self i will never take a young lady cos they break heart and made my mind to take old woman who understand love

Bummer is that it's usually takes a 64-68 yr old to see what I am truly like. Hardly ever meet a man my age who does.

@ Cuddlebunny, an example is exactly that: an example. If you don't understand that, there's no need to lash out.

The one thing I agree with you on is that the age group of men approx. 49-50 is difficult. I have the same problem. For some reason or other most of them don't seem to click with women their own age. Indeed they're either looking for much younger women or they've lost their lust for life (shows in their eyes).
For that same reason I'm also open for a slightly younger partner. Men approx 43-45 still seem to still have that lust for life. It's as if something happens when a man hits 48??

Best defense for that...IGNORE and BLOCKED...

It's not always fake..mature people..especially have great understanding of life..sometimes we just can't resist being loved n mentored at the same time..simple..

Well, now this is an interesting comment. I never thought of it as "loved and mentored" at the same time. My thought was that they might be looking for a mother figure in their lives. Glad you made this comment.

Life is so full of alternate views..but a mother figure is also never n nowhere near to a lover figure..how do we ignore the other side of the coin which heavily includes love, romance, sex, possessiveness, etc.

Hey! I'm not young but I go scuba diving, mountain climbing, and I love to club baby seals!!!