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Topic: Unconditional love.
EdwardCB Joined Mon 07/29/13 Posts: 782	Mon 08/05/13 05:09 PM
I love my boyfriend so very much, the thought of being without him is truly unpleasant, i cant bear to be without him, i would love him to death, however i know it's possible for my love to dissipate if he were doing something i found unforgivable, so i think, unconditional love in friendships/relationships doesn't exist. Even if it were possible, it would be horrible or psychotic ex/ it would be crazy to stay with someone who cheated on you, abused to you, lied to you.. But unconditional love can exist between parents & child and vice versa.. and i do believe that God loves us unconditionaly c: oh and i think only WE can love ourselves unconditionaly..but it's only my opinion. Umm if u love ur bf so much why the hell are u on a dating site? We met on here hahahaha Fair enough. Lol. Great job.

1Cynderella Joined Mon 02/18/13 Posts: 2398	Mon 08/05/13 09:16 PM
I know that there is love that runs deeper than our flaws. I think that's what people consider unconditional love. But realistically, a heinous enough act could kill anyone's love for even the one they cherish most in the world...even especially the one they cherish most in the world. That description seems true: Love that runs deeper than our flaws. I disagree with the second part: Love can endure even the most heinous acts. If you think about people who commit gruesome crimes, like murder, how their loved ones, much of the time, do not abandon them amidst their turmoil; their love endures. Even less extreme scenarios, like someone you love leaving you; your love for that person doesn't just go away. If it did, life would be exponentially easier, but exponentially shallower. If your husband rapes, tortures and murders your daughter can you still love him unconditionally? Yes. You can forgive. Forgiveness is a pivotal part of love. "Love is not love / which alters when it alteration finds." If God can forgive any person completely, so should we. It's still a choice; you can hold your hatred against extreme evil inside you and let it destroy you, or you can forgive; you can love. Those are your options. Those are not the only two options. I have no hatred in me...trust me, it's been thoroughly tested. Neither do I have to love someone who has changed into something THAT contrary to the person I had love for once. My love is constant. In this scenario, it's the person that's altered...not my love. I would still love the person he was, but he is no longer that person. There are thousands of options between hate and love. I can feel a great deal of compassion for the person they have become, even though they have stepped outside of the boundaries of my love. I think most people don't truly know the boundaries of their love until they've actually been tested beyond their limits. I do believe everyone has their limits. We are not Gods, we are humans with human emotions...such as love.

navygirl Joined Sat 06/02/07 Posts: 8118	Mon 08/05/13 09:31 PM
The only unconditional love I have experienced is with my family. Goodness knows we have had our differences and even when I piss off one of my brothers; they still love me not matter what. A romantic love; there is always conditions. A parent's love is supposed to be unconditional but I have know lots of parents that will have nothing to do with their kids and like one poster said there are parents that are killing their own children. Where is the unconditional love there? As far as I am concerned, when the chips are down; my family is always there for me and I have never had a romantic love that would stand by me.

ZPicante Joined Sun 02/03/08 Posts: 1806	Mon 08/05/13 11:09 PM Edited by ZPicante on Mon 08/05/13 11:12 PM
I know that there is love that runs deeper than our flaws. I think that's what people consider unconditional love. But realistically, a heinous enough act could kill anyone's love for even the one they cherish most in the world...even especially the one they cherish most in the world. That description seems true: Love that runs deeper than our flaws. I disagree with the second part: Love can endure even the most heinous acts. If you think about people who commit gruesome crimes, like murder, how their loved ones, much of the time, do not abandon them amidst their turmoil; their love endures. Even less extreme scenarios, like someone you love leaving you; your love for that person doesn't just go away. If it did, life would be exponentially easier, but exponentially shallower. If your husband rapes, tortures and murders your daughter can you still love him unconditionally? Yes. You can forgive. Forgiveness is a pivotal part of love. "Love is not love / which alters when it alteration finds." If God can forgive any person completely, so should we. It's still a choice; you can hold your hatred against extreme evil inside you and let it destroy you, or you can forgive; you can love. Those are your options. Those are not the only two options. I have no hatred in me...trust me, it's been thoroughly tested. Neither do I have to love someone who has changed into something THAT contrary to the person I had love for once. My love is constant. In this scenario, it's the person that's altered...not my love. I would still love the person he was, but he is no longer that person. There are thousands of options between hate and love. I can feel a great deal of compassion for the person they have become, even though they have stepped outside of the boundaries of my love. I think most people don't truly know the boundaries of their love until they've actually been tested beyond their limits. I do believe everyone has their limits. We are not Gods, we are humans with human emotions...such as love. Love is not an emotion. First of all. Love might involve emotions, but love is not itself an emotion. Love is closest to an action. Perhaps love could be called "a conscious act of will." That quote came from Shakespeare's Sonnet 116: SONNET 116 Let me not to the marriage of true minds Admit impediments. Love is not love Which alters when it alteration finds, Or bends with the remover to remove: O no! it is an ever-fixed mark That looks on tempests and is never shaken; It is the star to every wandering bark, Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken. Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks Within his bending sickle's compass come: Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks, But bears it out even to the edge of doom. If this be error and upon me proved, I never writ, nor no man ever loved. Clearly, you missed the point, or attempted to repeat the point, and failed. So, you've forced me to paraphrase Shakespeare. Thanks. Even just looking at those two lines (which I quoted before), "love is not love / Which alters when it alteration finds," no one could put the notion more eloquently or succinctly. When a person changes, love remains steadfast, through "tempests," through trouble, all kinds of trouble. When a person alters, love does not alter. That's eternal, unconditional love. Hmmm, no, there really are only two options. Either you love someone or you don't. Pretty simple. There may be a lot surrounding a situation, such as jealousy or pride or infidelity, but none of those things represent love; so, they must represent hate, and I'd argue that they do. Love is pretty black and white. Either you're striving to love or you're striving to hate; just as you're either striving to live or striving to die. There is no in between. I should know.

1Cynderella Joined Mon 02/18/13 Posts: 2398	Tue 08/06/13 06:43 AM
I know that there is love that runs deeper than our flaws. I think that's what people consider unconditional love. But realistically, a heinous enough act could kill anyone's love for even the one they cherish most in the world...even especially the one they cherish most in the world. That description seems true: Love that runs deeper than our flaws. I disagree with the second part: Love can endure even the most heinous acts. If you think about people who commit gruesome crimes, like murder, how their loved ones, much of the time, do not abandon them amidst their turmoil; their love endures. Even less extreme scenarios, like someone you love leaving you; your love for that person doesn't just go away. If it did, life would be exponentially easier, but exponentially shallower. If your husband rapes, tortures and murders your daughter can you still love him unconditionally? Yes. You can forgive. Forgiveness is a pivotal part of love. "Love is not love / which alters when it alteration finds." If God can forgive any person completely, so should we. It's still a choice; you can hold your hatred against extreme evil inside you and let it destroy you, or you can forgive; you can love. Those are your options. Those are not the only two options. I have no hatred in me...trust me, it's been thoroughly tested. Neither do I have to love someone who has changed into something THAT contrary to the person I had love for once. My love is constant. In this scenario, it's the person that's altered...not my love. I would still love the person he was, but he is no longer that person. There are thousands of options between hate and love. I can feel a great deal of compassion for the person they have become, even though they have stepped outside of the boundaries of my love. I think most people don't truly know the boundaries of their love until they've actually been tested beyond their limits. I do believe everyone has their limits. We are not Gods, we are humans with human emotions...such as love. Love is not an emotion. First of all. Love might involve emotions, but love is not itself an emotion. Love is closest to an action. Perhaps love could be called "a conscious act of will." That quote came from Shakespeare's Sonnet 116: SONNET 116 Let me not to the marriage of true minds Admit impediments. Love is not love Which alters when it alteration finds, Or bends with the remover to remove: O no! it is an ever-fixed mark That looks on tempests and is never shaken; It is the star to every wandering bark, Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken. Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks Within his bending sickle's compass come: Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks, But bears it out even to the edge of doom. If this be error and upon me proved, I never writ, nor no man ever loved. Clearly, you missed the point, or attempted to repeat the point, and failed. So, you've forced me to paraphrase Shakespeare. Thanks. Even just looking at those two lines (which I quoted before), "love is not love / Which alters when it alteration finds," no one could put the notion more eloquently or succinctly. When a person changes, love remains steadfast, through "tempests," through trouble, all kinds of trouble. When a person alters, love does not alter. That's eternal, unconditional love. Hmmm, no, there really are only two options. Either you love someone or you don't. Pretty simple. There may be a lot surrounding a situation, such as jealousy or pride or infidelity, but none of those things represent love; so, they must represent hate, and I'd argue that they do. Love is pretty black and white. Either you're striving to love or you're striving to hate; just as you're either striving to live or striving to die. There is no in between. I should know. I agree that Shakespeare's Sonnet 116 is beautiful. According to your, and Shakespeare's, definition of love, I must love everyone...as I hate none. In the spirit of trying to understand your concept of this, if there is nothing in between, and jealousy, pride and infidelity are all hate, then are sympathy, compassion and pity actually love? Personally, I subscribe to the traditional definitions of love and hate as supported by modern psychology as being emotions. So, we are not likely to agree on anything using such different definitions. But I'm confident you won't hold that against me, as someone so vehemently passionate about LOVE.

sweetestgirl11 Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 30087	Tue 08/06/13 06:53 AM
I know that there is love that runs deeper than our flaws. I think that's what people consider unconditional love. But realistically, a heinous enough act could kill anyone's love for even the one they cherish most in the world...even especially the one they cherish most in the world. That description seems true: Love that runs deeper than our flaws. I disagree with the second part: Love can endure even the most heinous acts. If you think about people who commit gruesome crimes, like murder, how their loved ones, much of the time, do not abandon them amidst their turmoil; their love endures. Even less extreme scenarios, like someone you love leaving you; your love for that person doesn't just go away. If it did, life would be exponentially easier, but exponentially shallower. If your husband rapes, tortures and murders your daughter can you still love him unconditionally? Yes. You can forgive. Forgiveness is a pivotal part of love. "Love is not love / which alters when it alteration finds." If God can forgive any person completely, so should we. It's still a choice; you can hold your hatred against extreme evil inside you and let it destroy you, or you can forgive; you can love. Those are your options. Those are not the only two options. I have no hatred in me...trust me, it's been thoroughly tested. Neither do I have to love someone who has changed into something THAT contrary to the person I had love for once. My love is constant. In this scenario, it's the person that's altered...not my love. I would still love the person he was, but he is no longer that person. There are thousands of options between hate and love. I can feel a great deal of compassion for the person they have become, even though they have stepped outside of the boundaries of my love. I think most people don't truly know the boundaries of their love until they've actually been tested beyond their limits. I do believe everyone has their limits. We are not Gods, we are humans with human emotions...such as love. I agree - heinous acts are first, an exceptional situation and second, if one believes in god in the first place, no god worth believing in will ask you to accept a heinous act, it is god's job to disposition that person and our ability to love and forgive will never be equal to that of god...the responsibility is to get that person to the proper authorities so that potential victims are protected and he/she gets the help they need. sometimes tough love is love too my love was also tested and I chose a path to no longer love someone (nothing as bad as the description above but bad enough). I can forgive to some extent but not love. I never claimed to be the Christ

2KidsMom Joined Tue 09/30/08 Posts: 58206	Tue 08/06/13 07:15 AM
going with my first thoughts, on this.. I believe it can and does exist.I have experienced it in my family,with my mom,and children. I believe it can exist outside the family, although very rare. If you can experience unconditional love, it is like no other. It is everything.

axl_rose40 Joined Mon 08/30/10 Posts: 868	Tue 08/06/13 07:23 AM
Simply put,unconditional love for me is a selfless love. One which someone very seldom feels towards their loved ones. We love our children because they are the fruits of our love with someone. But would we love them if they did not come from our own flesh? We love our partners because we know they love us for all that we are. But would we love them if we know they do not have the inkling to love us back? We love our friends because they have given us the reason to be friends with each other. But would we love them if they have not been friends to us? Unconditional love is something we feel towards other person without thinking anything about ourselves. Loving without asking for something in return, without even expecting to be loved back.

1Cynderella Joined Mon 02/18/13 Posts: 2398	Tue 08/06/13 07:50 AM
Unconditional love is something we feel towards other person without thinking anything about ourselves. Loving without asking for something in return, without even expecting to be loved back. Now ^^^ THIS ^^^ is a definition of unconditional love I can related to. And I agree that this is very possible and much more common, and even mentally and emotionally healthy...as long as you don't allow it to be used against you with cruel intent. To me this ideal of unconditional love doesn't say, "I will love you the same no matter how many welts you put on my back", it simply means that it CAN exist without personal reward...usually because the person DESERVES IT.

sweetestgirl11 Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 30087	Tue 08/06/13 07:44 PM
going with my first thoughts, on this.. I believe it can and does exist.I have experienced it in my family,with my mom,and children. I believe it can exist outside the family, although very rare. If you can experience unconditional love, it is like no other. It is everything. well said!

sweetestgirl11 Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 30087	Tue 08/06/13 07:47 PM
Simply put,unconditional love for me is a selfless love. One which someone very seldom feels towards their loved ones. We love our children because they are the fruits of our love with someone. But would we love them if they did not come from our own flesh? We love our partners because we know they love us for all that we are. But would we love them if we know they do not have the inkling to love us back? We love our friends because they have given us the reason to be friends with each other. But would we love them if they have not been friends to us? Unconditional love is something we feel towards other person without thinking anything about ourselves. Loving without asking for something in return, without even expecting to be loved back. I agree, great answer!

sanjeev009 Joined Fri 01/18/08 Posts: 2115	Wed 08/07/13 01:01 AM
search i f u find unconditional love n please massaged me too that u find?

_sandy_ Joined Tue 05/07/13 Posts: 32	Wed 08/07/13 01:12 AM
I am here for unconditional love, any girl want to rise in with me ?

MythicalMark Joined Sat 06/22/13 Posts: 71	Wed 08/07/13 02:01 AM
To me unconditional love is like "I'm a drug dealer are you cool with that?" "No" "Well then you don't love me unconditionaly" Maybe unconditional love is over rated.

EdwardCB Joined Mon 07/29/13 Posts: 782	Wed 08/07/13 02:24 AM
I am here for unconditional love, any girl want to rise in with me ? That was one of the lamest pickup lines I have ever heard

ZPicante Joined Sun 02/03/08 Posts: 1806	Wed 08/07/13 02:25 AM
I agree that Shakespeare's Sonnet 116 is beautiful. According to your, and Shakespeare's, definition of love, I must love everyone...as I hate none. In the spirit of trying to understand your concept of this, if there is nothing in between, and jealousy, pride and infidelity are all hate, then are sympathy, compassion and pity actually love? Personally, I subscribe to the traditional definitions of love and hate as supported by modern psychology as being emotions. So, we are not likely to agree on anything using such different definitions. But I'm confident you won't hold that against me, as someone so vehemently passionate about LOVE. Sigh. No. Trust, humility, and faithfulness* are parts of love. Love is a series of actions that do not change if the subject of that love changes; that is what "unconditional" means. No matter what flaws a person may have, or may attain, love sees beyond them always. That said, unconditional love is impossible for a human being to achieve without God. * Those being the approximate, conceptual opposites of jealousy, pride, and infidelity.

Conrad_73 Joined Sat 09/29/07 Posts: 22488	Wed 08/07/13 04:18 AM
yep,in the Words of Dominique Francon. Casting Pearls,and not even getting Porkchops in return! Ayn Rand "The Fountainhead"

1Cynderella Joined Mon 02/18/13 Posts: 2398	Wed 08/07/13 06:31 AM Edited by 1Cynderella on Wed 08/07/13 06:40 AM
I agree that Shakespeare's Sonnet 116 is beautiful. According to your, and Shakespeare's, definition of love, I must love everyone...as I hate none. In the spirit of trying to understand your concept of this, if there is nothing in between, and jealousy, pride and infidelity are all hate, then are sympathy, compassion and pity actually love? Personally, I subscribe to the traditional definitions of love and hate as supported by modern psychology as being emotions. So, we are not likely to agree on anything using such different definitions. But I'm confident you won't hold that against me, as someone so vehemently passionate about LOVE. Sigh. No. Trust, humility, and faithfulness* are parts of love. Love is a series of actions that do not change if the subject of that love changes; that is what "unconditional" means. No matter what flaws a person may have, or may attain, love sees beyond them always. That said, unconditional love is impossible for a human being to achieve without God. * Those being the approximate, conceptual opposites of jealousy, pride, and infidelity. Did you just sigh at me? Sorry, I didn't explain that I was not seeking antonyms of jealousy, pride and infidelity. You illustrated those negative emotions and actions as being a part of hatred, so I was asking if you also relate positive emotions and actions to love...specifically sympathy, compassion and pity, which are the three non-hateful emotions I CAN feel for someone I once loved who later turns into a rapist, sadistic torturer and murderer. I can feel sympathy, compassion and pity for even the most vile monster, in fact usually do whether I professed to have loved them before or not. So, if those are indeed a part of love by your definition, then I guess I DO have unconditional love for a rapist and murderer. I'm just illustrating that by your definition, I DO love unconditionally...therefor we are debating something we actually agree on. However, had I been married to this person prior to his horrific actions, there would certainly be no more nookie in his future.

EdwardCB Joined Mon 07/29/13 Posts: 782	Wed 08/07/13 06:50 AM
Oh no I thought we was going to be able to not hear the coon rant anymore but don't think that's going to happen

1Cynderella Joined Mon 02/18/13 Posts: 2398	Wed 08/07/13 06:57 AM
To me unconditional love is like "I'm a drug dealer are you cool with that?" "No" "Well then you don't love me unconditionaly" Maybe unconditional love is over rated. Thats what I think. But Im talking about the person trina impose the condition. People who ask for unconditional love seem to have something up their sleeve. Like some have said, the love is still there, even if I dont what the behavior in my life, so Im leavin. Love wont make me prisoner. Love just makes me happy and alive. So if someone chooses their drugs over me, then they dont really love me much anyway, do they? what im trina say, is that the love isnt conditional, the relationship is. It's easier to love someone unconditionally....if you know for sure what their condition is FIRST!