Good for you!Good attitude.

Well, at least you can look at your self in the mirror and know you were true and loyal. Sounds like its his loss.The cut is deep and will need time to heal. Your a very lovely woman and God will reward you with a true love this time for real.Stay who you are and best of luck to you!

Thank you

miko1960 stated:





How I wish that were true.

You have lived a peaceful and sheltered life if you believe that the very worse thing one persona can do to the other person is cheat.

I've had worse things done to me.... I won't go into them.

Yes this is true. Ignorance is bliss.

And sometimes we fool ourselves. I think if you are around a really truly happy person, you can feel it. Joy can be felt. So can unhappiness.

What's with the "Women cheat too" arguement? The OP just wants help on how to get through this. I don't see what gender-blaming is gonna solve. Some just need to stop being bitter. It isn't a good look. The OP could be man, woman, but why would THAT make any difference? Her man cheated on her. She wants advice. She hasn't hurt anyone.

The fact that a married woman was cheated on by her husband doesn't mean that all men are untrustworthy. That bit of reality is something that the author of the OP needs to acknowledge if she wants to have a meaningful relationship with another man.

I believe that we have more than one soul mate (who are not always romantic partners)and through out our lives we may have a few. People who we formed an unexplainable bond with, who were there at that time and for a specific reason - which is usually what we needed at that time, and then learn huge life lessons from. Soulmates don't have to physically be in your life forever.
Keep the faith

Absolutes are rarely true.

"All men" is an absolute.

But statistically, the greatest threat to a woman is a man.

Its a miracle you men ever get dates. LOL

Look who's talking.

What does that mean? I don't date men because I know the statistics.
They are dangerous.

yes. And they say " love is blind" maybe i just didn't want to see there was a problem. He was extremely happy and i did feel it but i realize it was when things were going well, like the finances ect. When things started getting tight i could see a strain come over him. He never really acted different towards me. But it was different. My god he spent the last week before he left fixing up the yard with new brick. Married it all in the back and put it just where it was gonna be put, just to leave? It didn't seem planned. Bought a grill. We just grilled out the weekend before. Its just baffling.

That does sound baffling. Do you know where he is ?

He's living with the OW about an hour away. He moved into her place 2 weeks after he left here. We've had very minimal contact. Which i don't mind. But the kids are Heartbroken. Well the younger 2. My oldest is so angry. They refuse to go over there and he was trying to get them to meet her after 2 weeks. After everything else. He's lost his fricking mind.

A Devil woman... and that will get old -- and he will miss his kids.

Yes he did lose his mind... its called infatuation. It could be temporary.

If you want him back, it might be possible.

But you may not want him back.

Now would be a good time to reinvent yourself, free from the restraints of the relationship.

You may find someone you like better, or you may discover you like being in charge of your own life....

Yes she is a devil woman. They were "friends"at work for a year before they slept together finally 2 weeks before he left. She's 7 years older and has 6 kids. Only 2 live at home. The same age as his own. That kills mine. I don't think i want him back. I would like to think i wouldn't take him back after all this. He's out us all through so much. I hope to find someone better someday because i know i deserve that and have a lot of love to give to the right man.

For your information, there is a strange phenomenon that happens to people who work together for any length of time. They may not be suited for each other, or even attracted to each other at first meeting and for a long time....

Then something happens on an unconscious level in the form of dreams. They may or may not remember these dreams, but they will become strangely attracted to each other on an unconscious level until it comes into their conscious and they will then start considering acting on these feelings.

If these feeling are acted on, they have an affair. It can ruin otherwise happy lives. If these feelings are not acted upon, they will go away.

I have seen this phenomenon happen to many people, and it even happened to me when I was married. I did not act on these feelings and I did remember the dreams. It went away quickly when I decided this was some sort of phenomenon and that it was not real.