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| Topic: Is love really blind to emotional abuse? | |
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In emotional abuse cases, when asked why they don’t leave, the victim will often defend their abuser insisting that the good days are so wonderful it’s worth going through the bad days. Sounds similar to physical abuse doesn't it?
Do you think that these victims of emotional abuse are having “love is blind” syndrome, or do you think the good days are the part of a well thought out plan by the abuser to keep their prey at hand? |
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Edited by
CremeBrulee
on
Mon 03/04/13 07:38 PM
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In emotional abuse cases, when asked why they don’t leave, the victim will often defend their abuser insisting that the good days are so wonderful it’s worth going through the bad days. Sounds similar to physical abuse doesn't it? Do you think that these victims of emotional abuse are having “love is blind” syndrome, or do you think the good days are the part of a well thought out plan by the abuser to keep their prey at hand? Main reasons they've given; for the children! He/she will change! Where will i go! I love him/her! BUT,the real reasons; zero self esteem-the dont think they can make it in the ''real'' big,wide world! Fear-he/she'll kill me if i left,where do i....,how do i...! |
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In emotional abuse cases, when asked why they don’t leave, the victim will often defend their abuser insisting that the good days are so wonderful it’s worth going through the bad days. Sounds similar to physical abuse doesn't it? Do you think that these victims of emotional abuse are having “love is blind” syndrome, or do you think the good days are the part of a well thought out plan by the abuser to keep their prey at hand? Main reasons they've given; for the childen! He/she will change! Where will i go! I love him/her! BUT,the real reasons; zero self esteem-the dont think they can make it in the ''real'' big,wide world! Fear-he/she'll kill me if i left,where do i....,how do i...! Although,some times,they just dont know-zombied! |
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In emotional abuse cases, when asked why they don’t leave, the victim will often defend their abuser insisting that the good days are so wonderful it’s worth going through the bad days. Sounds similar to physical abuse doesn't it? Do you think that these victims of emotional abuse are having “love is blind” syndrome, or do you think the good days are the part of a well thought out plan by the abuser to keep their prey at hand? Love doesn't keep a person with an abuser. Fear does. |
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In emotional abuse cases, when asked why they don’t leave, the victim will often defend their abuser insisting that the good days are so wonderful it’s worth going through the bad days. Sounds similar to physical abuse doesn't it? Do you think that these victims of emotional abuse are having “love is blind” syndrome, or do you think the good days are the part of a well thought out plan by the abuser to keep their prey at hand? Main reasons they've given; for the childen! He/she will change! Where will i go! I love him/her! BUT,the real reasons; zero self esteem-the dont think they can make it in the ''real'' big,wide world! Fear-he/she'll kill me if i left,where do i....,how do i...! Although,some times,they just dont know-zombied! I totally agree with this, I was there once for many years in my marriage. Over the years you lose yourself and esteem and are afraid to go it alone so you put up with it and make excuses. But there is a point when one says enough is enough or for me anyways. |
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Edited by
CremeBrulee
on
Mon 03/04/13 08:21 PM
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In emotional abuse cases, when asked why they don’t leave, the victim will often defend their abuser insisting that the good days are so wonderful it’s worth going through the bad days. Sounds similar to physical abuse doesn't it? Do you think that these victims of emotional abuse are having “love is blind” syndrome, or do you think the good days are the part of a well thought out plan by the abuser to keep their prey at hand? Main reasons they've given; for the childen! He/she will change! Where will i go! I love him/her! BUT,the real reasons; zero self esteem-the dont think they can make it in the ''real'' big,wide world! Fear-he/she'll kill me if i left,where do i....,how do i...! Although,some times,they just dont know-zombied! I totally agree with this, I was there once for many years in my marriage. Over the years you lose yourself and esteem and are afraid to go it alone so you put up with it and make excuses. But there is a point when one says enough is enough or for me anyways. Oh dear,oh dear!! CB,that must've been a tough situation...sorry to hear! BUT,you got strong enough to get up and leave! Wow! Thats very commendable; most women in that situation never have the guts-many times,they choose otherways of ''leaving'',like ending it all for good! Way to go!! |
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In emotional abuse cases, when asked why they don’t leave, the victim will often defend their abuser insisting that the good days are so wonderful it’s worth going through the bad days. Sounds similar to physical abuse doesn't it? Do you think that these victims of emotional abuse are having “love is blind” syndrome, or do you think the good days are the part of a well thought out plan by the abuser to keep their prey at hand? Main reasons they've given; for the childen! He/she will change! Where will i go! I love him/her! BUT,the real reasons; zero self esteem-the dont think they can make it in the ''real'' big,wide world! Fear-he/she'll kill me if i left,where do i....,how do i...! Although,some times,they just dont know-zombied! Yes, I agree, where physical abuse is concerned. I'm talking about emotional or verbal forms of abuse. Maybe I should have expanded on my thinking here. The kind of abuse I'm talking about, the abuser talks down to their partner, cursing them and berating them on a regular basis. |
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In emotional abuse cases, when asked why they don’t leave, the victim will often defend their abuser insisting that the good days are so wonderful it’s worth going through the bad days. Sounds similar to physical abuse doesn't it? Do you think that these victims of emotional abuse are having “love is blind” syndrome, or do you think the good days are the part of a well thought out plan by the abuser to keep their prey at hand? Main reasons they've given; for the childen! He/she will change! Where will i go! I love him/her! BUT,the real reasons; zero self esteem-the dont think they can make it in the ''real'' big,wide world! Fear-he/she'll kill me if i left,where do i....,how do i...! Although,some times,they just dont know-zombied! I totally agree with this, I was there once for many years in my marriage. Over the years you lose yourself and esteem and are afraid to go it alone so you put up with it and make excuses. But there is a point when one says enough is enough or for me anyways. Sorry to hear it. Great input...broken down self esteem. Thank you for the insight. I'm glad you said enough! 
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In emotional abuse cases, when asked why they don’t leave, the victim will often defend their abuser insisting that the good days are so wonderful it’s worth going through the bad days. Sounds similar to physical abuse doesn't it? Do you think that these victims of emotional abuse are having “love is blind” syndrome, or do you think the good days are the part of a well thought out plan by the abuser to keep their prey at hand? Main reasons they've given; for the childen! He/she will change! Where will i go! I love him/her! BUT,the real reasons; zero self esteem-the dont think they can make it in the ''real'' big,wide world! Fear-he/she'll kill me if i left,where do i....,how do i...! Although,some times,they just dont know-zombied! Yes, I agree, where physical abuse is concerned. I'm talking about emotional or verbal forms of abuse. Maybe I should have expanded on my thinking here. The kind of abuse I'm talking about, the abuser talks down to their partner, cursing them and berating them on a regular basis. In many cases,emotional abuse goes deeper than what we may think! This talking down on a person,berating,swearing,etc..... The abused person looses self worth,developes a belief that what ever the abuser says of the abused is true....they are damaged to the bone! Many times,people say,they'd rather be hit physically,than abused verbally,because of what it feels inside.. |
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I often wonder if anyone who hasn't suffered from a lover doing this, can ever really know what it's like.
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In emotional abuse cases, when asked why they don’t leave, the victim will often defend their abuser insisting that the good days are so wonderful it’s worth going through the bad days. Sounds similar to physical abuse doesn't it? Do you think that these victims of emotional abuse are having “love is blind” syndrome, or do you think the good days are the part of a well thought out plan by the abuser to keep their prey at hand? Main reasons they've given; for the childen! He/she will change! Where will i go! I love him/her! BUT,the real reasons; zero self esteem-the dont think they can make it in the ''real'' big,wide world! Fear-he/she'll kill me if i left,where do i....,how do i...! Although,some times,they just dont know-zombied! Yes, I agree, where physical abuse is concerned. I'm talking about emotional or verbal forms of abuse. Maybe I should have expanded on my thinking here. The kind of abuse I'm talking about, the abuser talks down to their partner, cursing them and berating them on a regular basis. In many cases,emotional abuse goes deeper than what we may think! This talking down on a person,berating,swearing,etc..... The abused person looses self worth,developes a belief that what ever the abuser says of the abused is true....they are damaged to the bone! Many times,people say,they'd rather be hit physically,than abused verbally,because of what it feels inside.. Thank you for this Newbie. This is a much better description than I gave. That's exactly what I'm thinking of.
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can i please talk with one of u girls.
i think u girls can help me out. |
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I often wonder if anyone who hasn't suffered from a lover doing this, can ever really know what it's like. No RG,they'd just put themselves in one's shoes.....nobody knows unless they've been through the same!! |
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can i please talk with one of u girls. i think u girls can help me out. Hi Goldie... Something happenned? You know we are here...well,that is,if 1C allows a divert within her thread?? 1Cynderella......?? |
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i really just want someone to talk too. because i am going through it now and would like some advice please.
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I often wonder if anyone who hasn't suffered from a lover doing this, can ever really know what it's like. No RG,they'd just put themselves in one's shoes.....nobody knows unless they've been through the same!! No, I don't imagine that we can. I've never had this experience in a romantic relationship, but grew up watching my mother go through it. I only know what she's told me about her feelings and her reasons for not leaving seemed to follow "the good times are worth the bad" response. She believed she loved him and that she was worthless without him. Thankfully, she got out and learned how capable she really was...only took 25 years. |
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can i please talk with one of u girls. i think u girls can help me out. Hi Goldie... Something happenned? You know we are here...well,that is,if 1C allows a divert within her thread?? 1Cynderella......?? I wish I had advise, but I was just interested in your opinions on the general subject. By all means...take it where it needs to go.
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i really just want someone to talk too. because i am going through it now and would like some advice please. You are in very good company here. These are some of the best gals you could meet.
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i really just want someone to talk too. because i am going through it now and would like some advice please. Ok......... What is it thate you are you going through?? We'll advise where we can |
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