being a single parent is tough...

ask yourself, are you willing to continue being a single parent?

be cause while he's away, it's just you and the little ones...

the benefits sound great, but when he is away for long periods of time, will it be something that you are willing to deal with...

you should spend time with him, (lots of it) before you marry...
Things aren't always what they appear to be....

Oh, yeah... and... as for the kids' fathers coming to visit them... that was too funny... considering my kids' dads don't give a damn about them, are not involved and do not take care of them or help in any way. The irony of this- my son's father passes my apartment every day to and from work... he works 4 blocks from my house, and has for about 6 months now, and he WILL NOT stop by to see his kid.

My daughter's father walked out on me in October 2004 and has not been seen or heard from since.

So- as for being overly concerned about what the so-called fathers of my kids would have had to go through- I am not concerned. They know I'd never deny them the chance to see their kids... but I am not going to wait around forever hoping someday they'll wake up and decide to be a real dad.

Anyway...
history is history... right?
Sometimes the dream of a "Happily ever after" sends us off into lala land. I've pretty much been alone all my life. I liked the idea that maybe someone wanted to be there. He's nice enough... we email still... but I don't want to cart my kids all over the place. I don't want to give up my family and friends here.

So I've decided I will be alone. Not forever, but for now. It's the way life is...

I have 2 kids I need to focus on. I don't get to be me. I gave that up when I became a mom... I get it.

Guess the complete family would just be a really great thing...
Someday...

you didn't lose yourself when you had your children.
you are still in there
fight to get out
it's not easy but take some time and do something just for yourself...

I had to learn the hard way that you can't let your world revolve around your kids
sure came back to bite me in the but when my middle child became a teenager....

I love my children, no matter what happens in life
but I had to learn to do things for me, just for me

you can't return love if your running on empty...
treat yourself....
take time to meditate...
take a bubble bath
get a manicure....
little things my friend
trust me you'll feel renewed....

you will find someone to love you , that you can love back
never lose YOU!

I'm sorry to hear that things did not work out for you and the military man. It seemed like he really loved you. Making decisions that put what right first is always hard.

I have 4 beautiful children I love them dearly. My oldest child is not really my child his father didn't want anything to do with him so I have raised him since he was 3 months old. He's just a kid and he needs a father. My ex- did not like kids when I first meet her 3 years ago. When I found out she didn't like children I was going to break it off right then and there but she begged my to give it a try and let her try to learn to love my children. I said yes, It was a horrible mistake. I'm just glad that I do not live with my children so they were not exposed to her, much. This is hindsight talking, I know that sound's like I'm a bad person but she broke my little girls heart when she would not visit. That was what broke us up. I tried to make it work but in the end she can't be with me because she's no good for them. I can't have someone in my life that hurts or disrupts my children's life, no matter how much I love them.

Children come first, you knew that and you made the right choice. I hope you find someone that is great for you and your children, I think you deserve that.

Thanks.