100% FREE ONLINE DATING
sponsored links
Previous
| Topic: Conflict......... | |
|---|---|
|
|
|
Well it there is conflict already then hitting it head first will probably increase the conflict. Most offenses between good friends usually start by misunderstandings or assumptions we make that are off. It's best to get past your offense and try and see the issue from there view.
If the conflict is an actual offense, you or they did something that hurt the other, that becomes something else. If the friendship is something you value. Take your time, do it right. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I think there's a difference between the silent treatment and taking a few moments, walk around the block, or even a solo drive in the country to think. Once something is said it cannot be taken back - my years (ya, I'm old) have taught me that much as WORD Taking a walk to think is much different than the silent treatment. To me, the silent treatment means one person is ignoring the other without discussing anything, or even letting them know what's going on. That is childish. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Well it there is conflict already then hitting it head first will probably increase the conflict. Most offenses between good friends usually start by misunderstandings or assumptions we make that are off. It's best to get past your offense and try and see the issue from there view. If the conflict is an actual offense, you or they did something that hurt the other, that becomes something else. If the friendship is something you value. Take your time, do it right. I guess we all think different things when we hear "head on." To me, it would be discussing what the issue is and why we're mad. In the past, that has worked well for me as it takes care of the issue sooner rather than later. I think ignoring the issue and/or not talking to the person would cause more conflict. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Edited by
sweetestgirl11
on
Sun 09/16/12 09:11 AM
|
|
Different people got diverse characters. I guess a proper understanding of your partner would here you know how to approach grey areas in your relationship. Headon doesnt work for everyone and may further escalate issues. You could really say that for anything. In my opinion, the silent treatment/ignoring the problem doesn't work and could escalate issues. well don't you think there's a difference between "head on" rush into a confrontation and the "silent treatment?' I don;t think either is particularly effective. So in a way I basically agree with you both (you & Dan) When I think head on, I think discussing the problem and dealing with it pretty quickly, rather than stewing over it and becoming more angry/upset all the while ignoring the other person. OK - I think we posted about the same time - I didn't see this before my last post but yes I think hours & hours or days on end of silence between 2 people who are supposed to be in a close relationship would be destructive I still advocate a cooling off period if one person wants that, & I would wonder about a person who could not grant that. On the other hand, if someone cares about me (or you or anyone) in a personal relationship, I don;t think that would be an issue ( a brief time to think) because people have different styles and I think that needs to be respected within reason, don't you? |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
A friendship; I would handle it head on as friends are way more understanding than any man I have ever been in a relationship with. A relationship; I would try to handle it head on but would probably end up with one of us doing the silent treatment as I find men in relationships with me are way too emotional to try to talk to when they are upset. On the flip side of that coin... I'll be up front and honest about something, while in a relationship, and then just get told whatever they feel i want to hear?.... only to have the issue brought back up wayyyyyy down the line. Which i always found strange because i wouldn't be nasty about it... I'd just give my personal perspective and feelings on a situation, then just get told something to placate me.. :shrug: IDK Yeah; its too bad that people can't be honest in a relationship. I can't look someone in the eye and just straight out lie to them about how I feel. I make a terrible liar. I also think in relationships; emotions run high and sometimes we need to step back from it. I am somewhat de-sensitized to another person's feelings as I think most of the time people over react to the smallest things; so I usually let them give me the silent treatment so they can cool down. I figure when the guy is ready to talk; he will. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Different people got diverse characters. I guess a proper understanding of your partner would here you know how to approach grey areas in your relationship. Headon doesnt work for everyone and may further escalate issues. You could really say that for anything. In my opinion, the silent treatment/ignoring the problem doesn't work and could escalate issues. well don't you think there's a difference between "head on" rush into a confrontation and the "silent treatment?' I don;t think either is particularly effective. So in a way I basically agree with you both (you & Dan) When I think head on, I think discussing the problem and dealing with it pretty quickly, rather than stewing over it and becoming more angry/upset all the while ignoring the other person. OK - I think we posted about the same time - I didn't see this before my last post but yes I think hours & hours or days on end of silence between 2 people who are supposed to be in a close relationship would be destructive I still advocate a cooling off period if one person wants that, & I would wonder about a person who could not grant that. On the other hand, if someone cares about me (or you or anyone) in a personal relationship, I don;t think that would be an issue ( a brief time to think) because people have different styles and I think that needs to be respected within reason, don't you? If someone told me they needed a short time to cool off and think, that's fine. I don't consider that ignoring or using the silent treatment. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
The silent treatment works when applied properly.
Besides...it gives me a chance to choose my words carefully instead of very easily hurting someone with viscous honesty. When I am pissed....I tend to not be very polite .......it is better for me to keep my mouth shut until I calm down. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
The silent treatment works when applied properly. Besides...it gives me a chance to choose my words carefully instead of very easily hurting someone with viscous honesty. When I am pissed....I tend to not be very polite .......it is better for me to keep my mouth shut until I calm down. How is the silent treatment applied properly? |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Unspoken dominance through self control.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Unspoken dominance through self control. I will agree that the silent treatment is used to try to dominate and control the situation. I don't think it works well most of the time, though. Someone refusing to talk to the other person about what's going on is just going to make the other person mad. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
dialogue my dear.. Talking reasonably always works.. Reasoning together is the only way.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
i deal with everything head on, but with a smile and normally just treat it as a joke, There's really not much in life that is worth arguing over.
|
|
|
|
|
