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| Topic: Thoughts only...rant | |
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So is it fair to say you men should grow up. When I bothered to date; all I heard was about their kids and grandkids and they made me feel like I wasn't worth the time. Also; had to contend with pet owners who cared more for their pets than me. So, just wanted to point out; it goes both ways. The thing about pets is that I wouldn't give mine up just because someone I was dating didn't like them, or just didn't want them. So in that sense, they are more important. But, they're easy to care for, so they won't take any time away from dating. Actually; I found that pets did indeed take away from the dating and ruined vacations. We couldn't go any where without the dog in tow. Couldn't sit in a restaurant and relax as you can't and shouldn't leave a pet in a vehicle because of heat and cold; couldn't leave the dog alone at the house and go for a walk because of barking and whining. Couldn't afford to put the dog in a Kennel so we were stuck with the pet and no outside life. I also itch quite bad from pet fur. So, for me it did interfere with dating. Also the guy was more upset about his dog being sick than me being tested for cancer. Yes, some pets do take a lot of time. I was specifically talking about mine, though. Of course for each person; its different. A friend of mine has 3 cats and two dogs. She treated her boyfriend as though he didn't exist so of course he had enough and broke up with her. I just find it hard to be treated like a second class citizen to someone's pet. Feels very insulting actually. Yeah, I'm sure it does. Pets are a big responsibility. I have two cats, which are easy to take care of. I don't have to stop what I'm doing or come home early. I can only imagine how it is to try to date someone who has to go home all the time to take care of their pets. I'm sorry you had to deal with that. Thanks Sing. You nailed it on the head though; pets are a big responsibility. To me; its like caring for young children. There are just massive ads for people giving up their pets and the top reason is that they simply don't have the time to care for the pets. Other reasons are of course because of allergies to young babies or their significant other. I have even read of pets jealous of a new born and we had one incident where a dog killed a new born baby because of jealousy. I really think people should have a trial period where they take the pet home and see what its like to care for a pet; rather than adopting it right away then months down the road just abandon it which seems to be another trend around here. |
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I wouldn't get serious with someone who didn't like cats. And I probably wouldn't go out with a "cat hater."...My husband died. My older son died. And my younger son may die soon due to a brain tumor...My cats have kept me going and give me a reason to wake-up each morning. (Even if I'm depressed.)...I have 4 cats right now. (My 2 cats and my son's 2 cats because my son is in an acute care facility.)...Anyway nobody better complain about my cats. They are the only "family" I have left besides my younger son...The cats have been loyal to me and I plan to stay loyal to them!..And I'm not dating anyway...But if I ever decide to date I'll bypass men who hate cats. It just wouldn't work out very well. I am sorry to hear about the difficult time that you are going through. I can understand what you are saying. After my brother divorced; all he had was his dogs. He was lonely and they kept him company. I think also some people are just care givers and once their children are grown; they need the pets to care for. Myself; I am not close to most of my family but I have very close friends that I call my family who are there for me in my worse times. I also keep busy with community volunteering as well as staying active in meet ups; so for me there simply is no time to care for pets. |
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I wouldn't get serious with someone who didn't like cats. And I probably wouldn't go out with a "cat hater."...My husband died. My older son died. And my younger son may die soon due to a brain tumor...My cats have kept me going and give me a reason to wake-up each morning. (Even if I'm depressed.)...I have 4 cats right now. (My 2 cats and my son's 2 cats because my son is in an acute care facility.)...Anyway nobody better complain about my cats. They are the only "family" I have left besides my younger son...The cats have been loyal to me and I plan to stay loyal to them!..And I'm not dating anyway...But if I ever decide to date I'll bypass men who hate cats. It just wouldn't work out very well. I am sorry to hear about the difficult time that you are going through. I can understand what you are saying. After my brother divorced; all he had was his dogs. He was lonely and they kept him company. I think also some people are just care givers and once their children are grown; they need the pets to care for. Myself; I am not close to most of my family but I have very close friends that I call my family who are there for me in my worse times. I also keep busy with community volunteering as well as staying active in meet ups; so for me there simply is no time to care for pets. Yes, it would be harder being a recluse. If you don't mind me asking; what made you a recluse? Or have you always been that way? If this is too personal; just tell me to mind my own business and I will respect your wishes. My friend describes me as a social butterfly. I am always out and about as I want to experience as much as I can before I die. I always think life is too short. I was doing some charity raising for our Homeless shelter called the Drop In center. It certainly was an eye opener but it gave me the chance to see the great work the center is doing and spread the word to others to donate to help keep up the great work these people are doing. |
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navygirl...I agree with you that life can be short. Right after I responded to your earlier post this morning (from my phone) my son ended-up taking a turn for the worst and died a short time later. (Peacefully.)...A friend came over to console me. (Which was nice.) And I've had to talk to staff people and make arrangements etc. (Yuk!)...I'm a "mess" and very "restless." Have so many layers of feelings to "work through."...Anyway I grew-up as an only child and just got used to doing my "own thing" at an early age I guess. (Writing. Trying to figure out solutions to world problems and ???)...Great that you do so much to help homeless people. I care about homeless people a lot too. (And learn "survival skills" from them and how to be happy no matter what etc.)...My son had a "big heart" and he cared about homeless people and anyone who was going through a "rough time" and always tried to help if he could...I don't think that it has totally "sunk-in" that my son is gone yet. It all happened so fast. I broke the news to the cats and they seem to be doing okay so far. (Better than me.) Sorry to go off-topic.
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navygirl...I agree with you that life can be short. Right after I responded to your earlier post this morning (from my phone) my son ended-up taking a turn for the worst and died a short time later. (Peacefully.)...A friend came over to console me. (Which was nice.) And I've had to talk to staff people and make arrangements etc. (Yuk!)...I'm a "mess" and very "restless." Have so many layers of feelings to "work through."...Anyway I grew-up as an only child and just got used to doing my "own thing" at an early age I guess. (Writing. Trying to figure out solutions to world problems and ???)...Great that you do so much to help homeless people. I care about homeless people a lot too. (And learn "survival skills" from them and how to be happy no matter what etc.)...My son had a "big heart" and he cared about homeless people and anyone who was going through a "rough time" and always tried to help if he could...I don't think that it has totally "sunk-in" that my son is gone yet. It all happened so fast. I broke the news to the cats and they seem to be doing okay so far. (Better than me.) Sorry to go off-topic. No apologies necessary. I am so sorry for your loss of your son. My heart goes out to you. If you need someone to talk to; I would gladly give you my phone number. |
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navygirl...I agree with you that life can be short. Right after I responded to your earlier post this morning (from my phone) my son ended-up taking a turn for the worst and died a short time later. (Peacefully.)...A friend came over to console me. (Which was nice.) And I've had to talk to staff people and make arrangements etc. (Yuk!)...I'm a "mess" and very "restless." Have so many layers of feelings to "work through."...Anyway I grew-up as an only child and just got used to doing my "own thing" at an early age I guess. (Writing. Trying to figure out solutions to world problems and ???)...Great that you do so much to help homeless people. I care about homeless people a lot too. (And learn "survival skills" from them and how to be happy no matter what etc.)...My son had a "big heart" and he cared about homeless people and anyone who was going through a "rough time" and always tried to help if he could...I don't think that it has totally "sunk-in" that my son is gone yet. It all happened so fast. I broke the news to the cats and they seem to be doing okay so far. (Better than me.) Sorry to go off-topic. No apologies necessary. I am so sorry for your loss of your son. My heart goes out to you. If you need someone to talk to; I would gladly give you my phone number. |
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navygirl...I agree with you that life can be short. Right after I responded to your earlier post this morning (from my phone) my son ended-up taking a turn for the worst and died a short time later. (Peacefully.)...A friend came over to console me. (Which was nice.) And I've had to talk to staff people and make arrangements etc. (Yuk!)...I'm a "mess" and very "restless." Have so many layers of feelings to "work through."...Anyway I grew-up as an only child and just got used to doing my "own thing" at an early age I guess. (Writing. Trying to figure out solutions to world problems and ???)...Great that you do so much to help homeless people. I care about homeless people a lot too. (And learn "survival skills" from them and how to be happy no matter what etc.)...My son had a "big heart" and he cared about homeless people and anyone who was going through a "rough time" and always tried to help if he could...I don't think that it has totally "sunk-in" that my son is gone yet. It all happened so fast. I broke the news to the cats and they seem to be doing okay so far. (Better than me.) Sorry to go off-topic. No apologies necessary. I am so sorry for your loss of your son. My heart goes out to you. If you need someone to talk to; I would gladly give you my phone number. No worries. Take care my friend. I let the others on Mingles know about your loss on the Well Wishes threads. Know that your mingles family is there for you. 
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Hey all. Is it really worth giving him bullets for his gun? It honestly seems better to just let the flames calm. You're just adding more fuel to his fire. It's obvious he wanted reactions. Just saying.
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Hey all. Is it really worth giving him bullets for his gun? It honestly seems better to just let the flames calm. You're just adding more fuel to his fire. It's obvious he wanted reactions. Just saying. Yeah; I think you are right about his motives. 
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I really get what people are saying about pets.
When you have one they really do become an integral part of your life. I think that is fine if they give you comfort and improve the quality of your life. Hopefully they don't become a barrier to human relationships. Something that is easy to slip into. Reason I am really debateing wheather now is the time for me to add a puppy. With a mate you both get to share the bonding process but solo that is kind of a different thing. And yea I have dated people, even had friends, that I felt like a second class citizen to an out of control pet. And it distanced the relationship. But a well cared for pet, or kid, or hobby, or job doesn't mean I can't be someone's friend or mate if things are kept in proportion. I figure how I treat the people in my personal life is directly related to how they are going to treat me. Balance and porportion isn't easy but it helps and I strive for it. Navy Girl I am wishing you were local today. lol Got a project I am doing on the house and wishing you were around to save me from screwing it up or at least to share some BBQ and tea with the couple folks that are going to be joining in. |
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I really get what people are saying about pets. When you have one they really do become an integral part of your life. I think that is fine if they give you comfort and improve the quality of your life. Hopefully they don't become a barrier to human relationships. Something that is easy to slip into. Reason I am really debateing wheather now is the time for me to add a puppy. With a mate you both get to share the bonding process but solo that is kind of a different thing. And yea I have dated people, even had friends, that I felt like a second class citizen to an out of control pet. And it distanced the relationship. But a well cared for pet, or kid, or hobby, or job doesn't mean I can't be someone's friend or mate if things are kept in proportion. I figure how I treat the people in my personal life is directly related to how they are going to treat me. Balance and porportion isn't easy but it helps and I strive for it. Navy Girl I am wishing you were local today. lol Got a project I am doing on the house and wishing you were around to save me from screwing it up or at least to share some BBQ and tea with the couple folks that are going to be joining in. You have peaked my interest. What kind of project are you doing? |
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PacificStar48...I agree with you. It was easier to take care of my cats when my husband was alive and we shared in their "care" together...Now I feel "outnumbered" at times. (Especially since I have my son's cats now too.) ...Who knows? Maybe I'm known as the "cat lady" of the neighborhood! (And viewed as a bit eccentri!) Oh well..When I'm ready to date and get out more the "barriers" will come "down." (Cats or no cats!)...I still managed to do quite a bit as a single parent when my sons were small. I worked and put myself through college and still found time to date and pursue my hobbies and interests etc..I found a way to "juggle" it "all!" And I will again.
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Edited by
GreenEyes48
on
Thu 09/06/12 08:59 AM
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navygirl...Thanks for caring and starting the other thread...So you're a "social butterfly?"
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navygirl...Thanks for caring and starting the other thread...So you're a "social butterfly?" You are quite welcome. Yeah; my friends think that. I am hardly ever home unless I am sleeping or sick. LOL Between all the meet up groups, playing in a band, teaching another band, and fixing stuff at my brother's place; my house stays pretty clean as I don't use it that much. 
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navygirl...Thanks for caring and starting the other thread...So you're a "social butterfly?" You are quite welcome. Yeah; my friends think that. I am hardly ever home unless I am sleeping or sick. LOL Between all the meet up groups, playing in a band, teaching another band, and fixing stuff at my brother's place; my house stays pretty clean as I don't use it that much. |
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navygirl...Thanks for caring and starting the other thread...So you're a "social butterfly?" You are quite welcome. Yeah; my friends think that. I am hardly ever home unless I am sleeping or sick. LOL Between all the meet up groups, playing in a band, teaching another band, and fixing stuff at my brother's place; my house stays pretty clean as I don't use it that much. Me; I am always online and seeing what is happening around the city and surrounding area. There is always lots to do here and some interesting clubs. I joined a costume club, astronomy club, walking club, cycling club, law of attraction club, ladies club, and of course my two bands. I also like to take in all the community events that go on here. I found a medieval dinner online last October and went to that. Not only did I have a great time; I met some new friends. The month of October 2012 I have two weekends where I am going out of town for training/camping and the other two weekends I have a military dinner to attend on the two Saturday nights which are a real good laugh. |
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navygirl...Thanks for caring and starting the other thread...So you're a "social butterfly?" You are quite welcome. Yeah; my friends think that. I am hardly ever home unless I am sleeping or sick. LOL Between all the meet up groups, playing in a band, teaching another band, and fixing stuff at my brother's place; my house stays pretty clean as I don't use it that much. Me; I am always online and seeing what is happening around the city and surrounding area. There is always lots to do here and some interesting clubs. I joined a costume club, astronomy club, walking club, cycling club, law of attraction club, ladies club, and of course my two bands. I also like to take in all the community events that go on here. I found a medieval dinner online last October and went to that. Not only did I have a great time; I met some new friends. The month of October 2012 I have two weekends where I am going out of town for training/camping and the other two weekends I have a military dinner to attend on the two Saturday nights which are a real good laugh. |
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navygirl...Thanks for caring and starting the other thread...So you're a "social butterfly?" You are quite welcome. Yeah; my friends think that. I am hardly ever home unless I am sleeping or sick. LOL Between all the meet up groups, playing in a band, teaching another band, and fixing stuff at my brother's place; my house stays pretty clean as I don't use it that much. Me; I am always online and seeing what is happening around the city and surrounding area. There is always lots to do here and some interesting clubs. I joined a costume club, astronomy club, walking club, cycling club, law of attraction club, ladies club, and of course my two bands. I also like to take in all the community events that go on here. I found a medieval dinner online last October and went to that. Not only did I have a great time; I met some new friends. The month of October 2012 I have two weekends where I am going out of town for training/camping and the other two weekends I have a military dinner to attend on the two Saturday nights which are a real good laugh. Really; the basic idea of law of attraction is the idea of staying positive; and visualizing it. It hasn't quite worked for me yet as right now I am desperately trying to find a better job. I like a lot of diversity in my life as I think it keeps me head clear and I have always been a curious person by nature. I quite like the challenge of learning new things. I just bought a 1973 Chalet Trailer that I am going to fix up over the winter. I have some good ideas of what I want to do and how to keep the costs low. It will be another great challenge and I am determined to have it on the road by next summer. I am also going to squeeze in a French course as I am sure that will open up some job opportunities here. |
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wooow...and i thought my fascination with boobs scared the ladies off
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wooow...and i thought my fascination with boobs scared the ladies off At my age; when a man looks at my boobs; its considered a compliment.
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