Does it happen quickly
and easily for you ?
or do you take your time ?

What are some signs
that show you that
you can trust someone ?

Would you trust someone
who is like this or not ?

>>Example:<<
You been talking to a lady
for two weeks not everyday,
then it goes into phone
conversations not everyday.

You think shes nice and may be
a potential good friend.
She says she wants you to give her
a chance for more ,You explain
nicely she isnt your type ..
She says she is ok with being
just friends and understands.

But over the course
of two weeks she has asked
to take you out four times
the first week. Either to the
moviesand dinner or both or
to the park or museum you
explain you dont meet people off
the bat and you dont know her well.

You try not to hurt her feelings
so you explain you not
wanting to meet her has
nothing to do with her or
her personality ,but your cautious.


You like to take your time on things.
and like to feel like you know someone
you explain to her again you dont
know her well. She says she
understands but then

The next week she asks seven
times more ,this time askes
to take you on a weekend
trip,just to get away for two days.
she says you can trust her.

This time you arent rude but you
say I told you every day no ,
I dont want to stop asking me .
She says she isnt being pushy
she just dont want to loose the
friendship thats building,

Then asks to please meet
and talk to her about it all
and you can trust her
you tell her you feel shes pushing
and she should find someone
else to be friends with.

Someone who will meet her
faster or move faster than
you are.she says no she
dont want to talk to
anyone else and appologises
yet again.Says she will
wait till your ready.

Then when you tell her you dont want
to talk to her as much because ,
you feel your disapointing her .
she then asks for your address to send
you a card .But I wouldnt give it to her,

>>>..How do You know ..<<<
if someone Is kind and just there
nature to move faster then you .

Or if there a odd ball and to stay clear ?
I know im new to all this and sites but its
just plainly frustrating.

Sorry it was a long explanation

Thank you

Blessings ƸӁƷ Harmony

If someone tries to move faster than what you are comfortable with and won't slow down, that is a red flag. Someone who is trustworthy lets things happen in due course of time. If this is happening to you, it sounds like this woman is fixated on you for whatever reasons they have.

I trust easily, too easily. I should be more cautious myself. This is of course, just my opinion. I trust because I give everyone the benefit of the doubt at first. Sometimes it costs me a little money, but mostly disappoints me because second chances are not given. "Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me."

There are zero signs I use to trust. I am not naive, I just try not to carry bitterness in my heart. I try to carry myself like I think Jesus would, and he loved everyone (and yes, I let my hair hang down here!). It is sad there are so many untrustworthy people in the world.

Someone starts crowding me I trust them even less.

Generally I start with small things and work up. I am not about to give someone my address until I have met them someplace public.

I like how that was said a red flag.
I never thought of it that way
I agree people should
respect others wishes.

It is sad there are so many
untrustworthy people
in the world. Its awful
years ago if one broke down
along the road you were grateful
someone stoped,now a days
you cant trust anyone
who does stop.


I am not naive either
but at times i think to much
with my heart.

Someone starts crowding me I trust them even less.

Generally I start with small things and work up. I am not about to give someone my address until I have met them someplace public.


I like how you put that,crowding me.
thats another red flag i should
always consider.

I guess it made me doubt
myself when it was said how
can you trust them if
your on computer.Sometimes its
good to have anothers opinion
on a situation.

Thank you very much

This person is CREEPY.When you are of a good nature, manipulative people push harder thinking they are getting somewhere in the guise of friendship. True friends respect your boundaries and your wishes, when friendship is the real motivation.

Thank you for what you said .
I felt it was pushing me
they making it sound I
am being silly and rediculous
being so cautious .
Thank you

Ive been on this site since April. The only people I trust for friendship are the people on the forums. I have learned that others on the site do not really want friendship, it is just a ruse to get their foot in the door. That is my reality :-(

Mingle was the first dating site I ever tried. I actually remember feeling shy (at first) cause I didn't know how sites like this worked. Thankfully, I saw the forums and started reading posts. It was then that I realized that people were posting all kinds of stuff (serious, funny, etc). Now, some of those people could have been full of BS and all, but it still helped me to realize that I could be my silly self on here. So, I just jumped in and decided to have fun.

Then the next hard part arrived. How in the world do you write a good enough intro email to a person you are interested in? It can be maddening. So, I figured that I would be my silly self and just see what happened. Plus, the first few emails I sent out were to women who were active in the forums. We had had convos in open public so it didn't feel so strange to send an email because (in a way) you were getting a feel for who that person is.

Anyways, when I email someone, I never have tried to assume anything. I didn't want to put pressure on a woman. Maybe I would throw out subtle hints and all that I liked that person, but I never was one to say "Hey! Let's hook up" when I knew that the girl I was chatting with only wanted friendship (or to start out as friends). I've never understood the whole badgering process. Sure, going for who you want isn't a bad thing. But you just can't pressure a person into wanting something that they don't. Yeah, that person may eventually cave in to get you to shut up, but I just don't feel a successful realtionship can be built that way (maybe I am wrong).

Yes, this is a dating site. Guys pursue girls and vice versa. But when it comes to the net, the great thing about a site like this is you can get to know someone (as best you can) from the comforts and safety of your own home. Guy asks a girl out, she says no, guy moves on. That's dating. Guy badger girl in real life, she says no, he persist, guy gets beat up by her big brother. That's dating too. My point here is that, on the net, one can be persistent cause...hey....what does he/she have to lose? It's easier. So, if someone were like that to me, of course it is gonna raise a red flag.

I don't know if I have made any sense here or not. Bottom line, I go by the old rule of thumb that "No" actually really means "No". And when someone tells you how they feel, what they want, etc.....then you need to respect it.

I wouldn't trust anyone who couldn't respect my boundaries. I'd cut off communication with her.

I agree with these comments.

If I am friendly with someone, and ask them to meet for a coffee say, and they politely reject my offer for any reason, I would not ask again but offer a rain check. Leaving it up to them to decide when and if they want to meet me, in the knowledge that they know I would like to meet them. This to me would be a normal response.

Trust the voice in your head. This has red flags all over it.

Thank you and I will i am glad to get
opinions cause part of me felt maybe
she would stalk me another part thouhgt
maybe shes genuine just outoing person
then mebut still im not wanting to meet
her so ill still with that thank you

Stalker!!!!! Run for the hills!!!!!

Seriously, anyone that is so desperate or needy that they can't give you space is a problem. I mean, this is just emails and on site behavior. Just imagine if it was in person. EEEEK!

I agree with the other folks on here. Block this person and move on.

Luck!

Thank you for your input everyone
Im glad I asked on it .Thank you
So many types of people on here
and the internet ect

Its hard at times to trust
and knwo who to .I think there
is many red flags up like someone
else said,

Im going to back away from it
it all thank you everyone truly .



Blessings ƸӁƷ Harmony

I say give her a chance :) you seem cautious already which is understandable... but how can you know if you never try.. who knows she could be the one! If things don't work out you can always remain friends... nothing is set in stone. gl!

hmmm.. Trust. It depends on what, but for men, I trust none of them 100% period.. But sometimes i pretend i do to avoid problem but back of my mind.. No trust, i just take it the way i see till proven otherwise. Now, concerning the lady, i seriously think she is pushing too much, sure no other agender? Maybe you should agree meeting in an open and public place and hear her out.. But under friendship levels, just in case

It takes a lot for me to trust a stranger. .