For eveyone else, thank you for being there to support me and the kind words. I think you all are wonderful too!!!

A little story.....I walked next to take the neighbors some fresh Mahi caught and fileted yesterday. I took some next door in a thunderstorm.....FLORIDA lightening flashing all around with loud thunderclaps piercing the twilight skies. I knocked on the door, and the elderly couple answered the knock. They let me enter their home. They took the fish and asked why I had come out in such severe weather. I replied to them with, "If am going to die today, then I shall die today. If its time for me to end it will happen in the house through the roof, it will come through the window, but if its not meant to be it won't hit me outside either. I am going home to finish dinner now. Have a nice evening Ms. Betty and Mr. Ben." I, then departed for the evening. I fed my two boys and played Sorry with them. I made sure they brushed their teeth and showered. They are now in bed. Many days went just the same with my daughter. Including she went to summer camp, modeling school, she played. I sent her around the block with walkie talkie before cell phones. I would call her home for dinner with a walkie talkie. I helped her make blueprints for a school (project) and build it with cardborad and paper, and learn accounting and how to debit and credit the recievables and payables, offset interest, set up tax accounts. I drove her to school when she was late doing her make up. I took her in the middle of the night to get ice cream because she couldn't sleep on a school night. I took her out of school half day on tax day to go shopping for the dance. I fought with the police and principles on her behalf.

She will always be your daughter. I'm sure she knows you love her, and it sounds like you two have some great memories.

PS I stopped giving her advice at 16 when she knew everything.........

at least they think so any how
my daughter at 16 already had her first child at 14 and had her 2nd child at 17
she had her 2nd child the day before she graduated.. she graduated with honors 1yr early..and she was the top of her class
my daughter is now 29yrs old with 4kids and she still learning... she doesnt know everything now wait untill my oldest grandaughter trys something she just turned 12

Just because one does not adhere to sound advice it does not mean one does not learn fromn it.. many a time I should have listened to the words sent my way, but life is a continual learning curve, and yes, I'm all the better for it now, though my education in life is never-ending... mind you, nor are my errors lol..

Your own child can wound you like no other human on earth. I don't need to even read the details to know you feel like someone has driven a knife in your womb.

I share with you a tidbit of wisdom my Sainted Mother inlaw imparted on me when a couple of my twenty somethings were very nearly driving me over the edge.

"Twenty Something's are two year olds on steroids. Just like you ignore their tanturms when they are toddlers you have to ignore their tantrums now. It is hard when they are old enought to REALLY know how to push your buttons but shut it down so you don't have to eat your own crow."

Then she reminded me that things they are copeing with as young adults/parents will be a reality orientation like none other. It didn't kill you raiseing yours and it will not kill them raiseing theirs."

Another was from and Aunt that said "This (developemental stage) too shall pass." And at the time it really doesn't feel like it will but it does.

The only way both sides can carry a grudge is if you agree to be one of the sides. Let that thought sink in because later on the price will be exacted for it.

So what she said something really stupid, untrue, even wounding to your friends or even the world. You are smarter than this. You know the truth. You are not really wounded unless you chose to be. Your friends know better and you won't convince your enemies if you were Mother of the Year. Come on shake it off.

Besides You also know she is a hormonal, probably exhausted, probably really lonely new Mom that may have no-one else to vent on. How poetic that she now knows how it feels? Who says God/Mother Nature does not have a sense of humor.

I am not saying you let her off scott free but hey seeing you twist in the wind over this would not be a satisfaction I allow her. Heck even nurse your delivery stitches a little bit now you actually have the time to. Whatever nice effort you might have done for her when she wasn't showing her butt do for yourself. Haven't you earned it?

Believe me she is going to miss you doing the nice things and maybe even is is why she is so pissed off that she can't do much about the situation she is in but spout off on some tirade.

I am seriously doubting you would trade most of it off if you could but yea any Mother worth her salt has dreamed about "What if" she never had a kid. Don't know if I would post it on line because hey this is a public forum and there is quite likely going to only add fuel tot he proverbial fire but hey it is out there like probably a lot of other stuff people put on line.

Lol hey the sweet reality is someday you will go to your second childhood and you can throw some lulu's of a tantrum when she least needs or expects it.

Yep its out there but anonymously in a forum she doesnt know I belong to.....vented to a place of anonymity........

Sorry to hear you going through this Seakolony, good luck!

I am not judging you in any way but it just sounds like you have some bitter feelings toward your daughter? I don't know the whole story and I don't want to, I will say this...one of my friends just buried her son a few days ago. I think what people need to do instead of being bitter about their children is talk to them more and show them how much they love them because who knows what could happen later on today. They could leave the house to go do something for you and be killed in an accident and then all you are going to think about is how you didn't say what you needed to say to them.
You would sit there and play the "what if" game. Or the "give me one more day" game. LIFE IS SHORT SO MAKE THE MOST OF IT!!!

I never play the what if game or beg for another day.....when life ends it ends I speak to them as if they were here and never left......as for my daughter and I talked to her afterwards.....after I vented here and was able to not vent on her or say soemthing i would regret saying to her if something did happen to her.....I wouldnt beat myself up because I had nothing said to her to take back.....I only said it in this forum.....

my dear, leave her a long letter explaining all from your heart, then go home, get on your knees and talk to God about her, morning, afternoon and night. It works.

Hang in there,
Since I am still in the middle of raising my 6, I have learnt that all we can do is our best, sometimes I would like to stangle my munchkins, but I still love them, the same as you do

don't worry if people judge you, thats part of people's nature, they like to think that they wouldnt think that or do that, but unless someone is in your shoes, they can never know how you feel, why you say something or your intentions when you say it.