Community > General Discussion

Topic: One for the ladies....
LoisBl Joined Fri 05/18/12 Posts: 213	Sat 06/09/12 11:41 AM
Education has nothing to do with intelligence. I think that if we have to dumb down for our mate, that perhaps we should not be together.

wux Joined Wed 07/29/09 Posts: 7426	Sat 06/09/12 04:50 PM Edited by wux on Sat 06/09/12 04:52 PM
I maybe going off on a tangent here, as i am prone to do, but i don't consider measuring smarts by the education one receives. I have seen professional couples do dumb things, namely the female in said relationship allowing her partner to be over bearing by talking down to her in mixed company. Having said that, i've also seen it done by women also. Now that was dumb of me to go and open that can of worms. Ha!...why would i need anybody else to put me down or beat me up when i can do a far better job of it? Sometimes the slap is not as painful as the sound it makes would indicate. I think you are a sensitive soul, kahu, and your intellect camouflages it and in the end your over-sensitivity triumphs in interpreting the raw data of interpersonal behaviour in which you are involved. I am somewhat similar; I can't accept into me the compliments given by others, or their apparent respect or likign for me, when it happens. I dismiss those positive social feeds automatically. So I am sensitive coz I only hear the blame and the put-downs. I am not alone in this, many forum users are similar. I've seen my share of a pretty or handsome new member asking for support, which others give him or her on the forums, and perhaps one guy will butt them down for it, and that's the only post they reply to, coz that's the only post they see. I still haven't learned how to properly pick up good vibes from others; that's why I am a forum attention hoorie. I sense you are a bit different in this; it's not your perception that is skewed or unclear, but the askence nuggets you put out which asks people to put you in a role. You don't want to play that role, and you rebel via your sensitivity. Case in point is your intellect; when someone treats you through that of your reception channels, you get deeply hurt why they don't show more warmth and love or support, whatever you want to call it. Well, people assume you are tough, because you are quick witted, and they hope to dumb up themselves in their dealings with you. They show their brilliance or genius, and those are always like a toccata and fugue; no feelings, only bravado and skill and techniqe. Then you get hurt because the parts of the symphony of interactions lack enough empathy for your needs. I don't know how you could remedy this. If I knew, I'd have already remedied myself. Mostly the new thought in therapy is that nothing works. The patient either gets better, or worse, or stays the same, but they therapy plays no role in that. The therapist and the patient play a huge role, however, in making the therapist have a steady and somwhat high income. Oh alright then, if you must...although i don't know how this got to be about me Yes i am sensitive to the point of friggen tears of mirth when people ASSume that i am something that i'm not. I find it highly entertaining to see how quickly one is shoved in a pidgeon hole. Seriously...you thought i was a man Wux??...lmao @ that one! I don't know what you've been mixing it up with there champ, but it certainly isn't kosha now is it? Ohhhhhh...i get it. You were waiting for me to flash my girly bits at you to prove i am female weren't you? Shucky darn @ silly me Edit because only 1 friggen friggen will do If you ask me, all I did was I asked the pigeon if this is her hole before I got it shoved in. But I guess that's a painful hole. I am completely innocent on this, by the way. I claim "Asperger's". That's in one of the amendments. this is the best amends I can offer. How it got around to you? I felt I had been talking about myself here on the forums, and my conscience about havign too much attention grabbed me with feelings of guilt, so I had to grab on to some topic about somebody else, lest I seem so very egotistical. I feel for you, Kahu, I shouldn't have asked you if you were a man. I am sorry that I have, and I apologize. Sincerely, from the bottom of my heart for a mistake I am only to blame for. What's done is done. If you can't forgive me for this, well, so be it. I will be much happier, though, if you forgave me.

wux Joined Wed 07/29/09 Posts: 7426	Sat 06/09/12 04:57 PM Edited by wux on Sat 06/09/12 05:01 PM
I really don't think it's any different to dressing differently for an interview. There are times when we act accordingly to make people more comfortable until they know us or until we have relaxed enough to trust someone. For some strange reason, this reminds me of an important question: Have any of you ever had sex on a job interview? Whether you were doing the interviewing, or you were looking for a position. (so to speak.) Or have any of you ever heard of such a thing happen to a friend or acquaintance of yours? If you or someone you knew had sex on the job interview, did the applicant get the job? -------------- IMPORTANT: I am talking about interviewing for mainstream, socially accepted positions. For instance: welder for a man, seamstress or secretary for a woman, accountant for a person, manager in a department store, etc. etc. NO sex trade or drug trade jobs, although drugstore pharmacicts and clerks are not excepted.

Mjav123 Joined Sat 06/09/12 Posts: 1	Sat 06/09/12 05:08 PM
HELL NO!!!

josie68 Joined Mon 11/22/10 Posts: 6270	Sun 06/10/12 05:00 AM
I really don't think it's any different to dressing differently for an interview. There are times when we act accordingly to make people more comfortable until they know us or until we have relaxed enough to trust someone. For some strange reason, this reminds me of an important question: Have any of you ever had sex on a job interview? Whether you were doing the interviewing, or you were looking for a position. (so to speak.) Or have any of you ever heard of such a thing happen to a friend or acquaintance of yours? If you or someone you knew had sex on the job interview, did the applicant get the job? -------------- IMPORTANT: I am talking about interviewing for mainstream, socially accepted positions. For instance: welder for a man, seamstress or secretary for a woman, accountant for a person, manager in a department store, etc. etc. NO sex trade or drug trade jobs, although drugstore pharmacicts and clerks are not excepted. Nope, I have never wanted a job that bad.

Sunshine_in_Florida Joined Sun 04/29/12 Posts: 186	Sun 06/10/12 08:02 AM
I'm curious to know if educated ladies do the "dumb down" if the object of their desire pulls up short in the smarts department? Oh hell no. I am who I am. If we are not on an equal plane intellectually in the beginning, it will only lead to frustration down the road. I have to be able to discuss things, and I have had it happen, I become impatient. If I keep them as a friend, I just would not talk in the areas where there is no understanding and avoid the conflict.So, that would be a friend not a long term mate.

galendgirl Joined Sun 07/06/08 Posts: 24728	Sun 06/10/12 08:06 AM
I really don't think it's any different to dressing differently for an interview. There are times when we act accordingly to make people more comfortable until they know us or until we have relaxed enough to trust someone. Saying that someone isn't smart because of it is not that smart either, it's just a personal opinion. Interesting point. Do you think that means if we don't rebound to our real intellectual limits that we've truly not achieved trust? Something to consider...

Ruth34611 Joined Sat 08/02/08 Posts: 32402	Sun 06/10/12 08:08 AM
When I was younger, yes I did.

galendgirl Joined Sun 07/06/08 Posts: 24728	Sun 06/10/12 08:08 AM
Have any of you ever had sex on a job interview? Whether you were doing the interviewing, or you were looking for a position. (so to speak.) No. Honestly, I didn't ever think of such a think beyond the stereotypical "casting couch" image.