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| Topic: Does your mother have narcissistic traits? Find out! | |
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Narcissistic Survey.
Narcissism is a spectrum disorder with the most severeend of the spectrum considered a narcissistic personality disorder. A woman can have several narcissistic traits and not fit the personality disorder. Mothers with only a few traits listed can negatively affect their daughters in insidious ways whichis explained in Dr. Karyl's book. (Check all those that apply to your relationship with your mother) Please feel free to print this page 1. When you discuss your life issues with your mother, does she divert the discussion to talk about herself? 2. When you discuss your feelings with your mother, does she she try to top the feeling with her own? 3. Does your mother act jealous of you? 4. Does your mother lack empathy for your feelings? 5. Does your mother only support those things you do that reflect on her as a “good mother”? 6. Have you consistently felt a lack of emotional closeness with yourmother? 7. Have you consistently questioned whether or not your mother likes you or loves you? 8. Does your mother only do things for you when others can see? 9. When something happens in your life(accident, illness, divorce), does your mother react with how it will affect her rather than how you feel? 10. Is or was your mother overly conscious of what others think (neighbors, friends, family, co-workers)? 11. Does your mother deny her own feelings? 12. Does your mother blame things on you or others rather than own responsibility for her own feelings or actions? 13. Is or was your mother hurt easilyand then carries a grudge for a long time without resolving the problem? 14. Do you feel you were a slave to your mother? 15. Do you feel you were responsible for your mother’s ailments or sickness (headaches, stress,illness)? 16. Did you have to take care of your mother’s physical needs as a child? 17. Do you feel unaccepted by your mother? 18. Do you feel your mother was critical of you? 19. Do you feel helpless in the presence of your mother? 20. Are you shamed often by your mother? 21. Do you feel your mother knows thereal you? 22. Does your mother act like the world should revolve around her? 23. Do you find it difficult to be a separate person from your mother? 24. Does your mother appear phony to you? 25. Does your mother want to control your choices? 26. Does your mother swing from egotistical to depressed mood? 27. Did you feel you had to take care of your mother’s emotional needs as a child? 28. Do you feel manipulated in the presence of your mother? 29. Do you feel valued, by mother, for what you do rather than who you are? 30. Is your mother controlling, actinglike a victim or martyr? 31. Does your mother make you act different from how you really feel? 32. Does your mother compete with you? 33. Does your mother always have to have things her way? Note: All of these questions relate to narcissistic traits. Themore questions you checked, the more likely your mother has narcissistic traits and this has caused some difficulty for you as a growing daughter and adult. |
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This is nothing new or surprising.
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Narcissistic Survey. Narcissism is a spectrum disorder with the most severeend of the spectrum considered a narcissistic personality disorder. A woman can have several narcissistic traits and not fit the personality disorder. Mothers with only a few traits listed can negatively affect their daughters in insidious ways whichis explained in Dr. Karyl's book. (Check all those that apply to your relationship with your mother) Please feel free to print this page 1. When you discuss your life issues with your mother, does she divert the discussion to talk about herself? 2. When you discuss your feelings with your mother, does she she try to top the feeling with her own? 3. Does your mother act jealous of you? 4. Does your mother lack empathy for your feelings? 5. Does your mother only support those things you do that reflect on her as a “good mother”? 6. Have you consistently felt a lack of emotional closeness with yourmother? 7. Have you consistently questioned whether or not your mother likes you or loves you? 8. Does your mother only do things for you when others can see? 9. When something happens in your life(accident, illness, divorce), does your mother react with how it will affect her rather than how you feel? 10. Is or was your mother overly conscious of what others think (neighbors, friends, family, co-workers)? 11. Does your mother deny her own feelings? 12. Does your mother blame things on you or others rather than own responsibility for her own feelings or actions? 13. Is or was your mother hurt easilyand then carries a grudge for a long time without resolving the problem? 14. Do you feel you were a slave to your mother? 15. Do you feel you were responsible for your mother’s ailments or sickness (headaches, stress,illness)? 16. Did you have to take care of your mother’s physical needs as a child? 17. Do you feel unaccepted by your mother? 18. Do you feel your mother was critical of you? 19. Do you feel helpless in the presence of your mother? 20. Are you shamed often by your mother? 21. Do you feel your mother knows thereal you? 22. Does your mother act like the world should revolve around her? 23. Do you find it difficult to be a separate person from your mother? 24. Does your mother appear phony to you? 25. Does your mother want to control your choices? 26. Does your mother swing from egotistical to depressed mood? 27. Did you feel you had to take care of your mother’s emotional needs as a child? 28. Do you feel manipulated in the presence of your mother? 29. Do you feel valued, by mother, for what you do rather than who you are? 30. Is your mother controlling, actinglike a victim or martyr? 31. Does your mother make you act different from how you really feel? 32. Does your mother compete with you? 33. Does your mother always have to have things her way? Note: All of these questions relate to narcissistic traits. Themore questions you checked, the more likely your mother has narcissistic traits and this has caused some difficulty for you as a growing daughter and adult. Yep, father too. |
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Edited by
Bravalady
on
Sat 03/17/12 07:19 PM
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OK, I got stopped at the first question. Discuss my life issues with my mother!!??? Pardon me while I choke. That NEVER happened.
Hopping around in the list a bit - Question #2 is the same, feelings were NOT discussed in our house. Yes to feeling unaccepted and criticized (but both parents did that). No need to give me advice about it because she's been dead for 25 years. |
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Aaargh, my two worse clients are axis II, narcissistic momma boys!
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http://youtu.be/WkL7Fkigfn8
I can dance with you Honey If you think it's funny Does your mother know that you're out? 
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Yes to most questions and yes it has had a knock on effect through my life even though my mother has been dead for years now.
It has affected any relationship I've had, particularly the sexual side. When you hear your mother saying sex is disgusting/decent girls don't enjoy sex/you're promiscuous if you even THINK about sleeping with a man etc. etc. then it does have a lasting effect. I've never enjoyed the intimate side of a relationship, even while married and I believe it is 100% down to my mother's skewed views. I brought my kids up differently. My son currently doesn't have a girlfriend but my daughter has been in a happy relationship for many years now. Both talk openly to me about sex and seem to be much better balanced than I'll ever be. I wish I could get rid of these hang ups but I doubt I will now and feel I've always missed out on something wonderful  |
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10 is the only one that applies to my mother and even that is pretty weak.
So, my mother is not narcissistic. Thank goodness, because we had enough dysfunction in our family without adding that! |
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Yes. Yes. Yes, and yes. My mother tops the charts. I had some serious therapy through my twenties to deal with the fall out. She has good traits, too. The hardest part for me has been learning that I am not responsible for the feelings of others, and that I have a very strong intuition that is a positive influence in my life that I can rely on more.
As a parent, myself, I have a big list of what NOT to do based on my experiences with my mom. Fortunately, my dad was a balancing factor in my life. 
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Yes, yes, and probably some more yes' on the list but so what? At some point in your life you quit sniveling about the vessel you came through to be a person and start being your own person/finding your own value.
UNHO there is a lot of psycho babble about how much Mother's make or break their kids but I find that kind of a concieted view on the parts of "Mothe"s " or inexperience people who think Mother's have a lot more power in life than they do. From about what two years old kids start saying know and having independent thought, outside influences, and that only grows. Somewhere along the line if you are screwed up in your thinking, goals, relationships you have to look in the mirror and say slef this is NOBODIES fault but me. |
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Edited by
PacificStar48
on
Wed 03/21/12 06:14 AM
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Opps my bad double post.
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Do you feel your mother knows thereal you?
not understanding what that would have to do with narcissism, is there some reason a mother shouldnt know their child? my mom is the person I feel probably knows me best, so it would apply to our relationship,,,, |
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yes pretty much to all of them..well except 7 ( and a few others) I never questioned weather she liked or loved me , because all through my childhood I knew she hated me..haha..but oh well life goes on.
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No....
My biological womb doner is a cowering, submissive wall flower to the 10th degree. My mom is quiet, shy and extremely reserved. My Dad taught me how to be a black belt ninja narccisist....I took it to the next level on my own. |
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No offence smart...
but, the last place I will look for someone to explain my mother to me is some random stranger copy and pasting someone elses opinion on the internet... Cause from my perspective..."Dr. Karyl" is a complete f'kn idiot. |
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