It is true that the first fight is the end for some couples but it doesn't have to be.while first fight are never fun.they are actually essential to the evolution of a relationship.nobody,no matter how close or how compatible they maybe agrees on absolutely everything.there will be conflicts in even the most successful relationship.what determines quality of the relationship isn't whether or not fight happen but how those fight are resolved.couples who listen to one another's concerns and perspective,who respect the others point of view whether they agree with it or not and work toward finding a compromise are more likely to make it through the first fight and stronger for the experience.

more likely to make it through the first fight and stronger for the experience.

I think fights are the doors of a relationship.
They open, they close, the decision is ours.
Stay in, get out.
Too many disagreements is its own sign.

communication is the key..... sometimes an argument can clear the air... sometimes it is the end. When one gets too defensive. You need to learn how to talk to each other. Trust me it is not an easy task in many cases. Communication is done in many ways and some times it is what we read into things that causes confusion. And sometimes it is our feelings. The balance of all is good. Relate to when you are happy and choose your battles. But never allow things to go unsettled for long, it creates resentments. Never go to bed angry. forgive and go on.... Life is too hard for resentments to creep in.

Fights are fine..as long as I win!

Depends on the fight really....

A disagreement is fine. Sure you may get booty hurt for a short period...but, then you remember that you are in love with someone who had better be treating you as an equal.

Fights....I ain't a big fan of them. I was never raised to take any crap off of anyone.....physically or mentaly. I am really good at dirty fighting and am pretty devious. But, I do my best to avoid it until it is the most effecient option.

I have had first fights end relationships and I don't regret it. I have put up with quite a bit of crap before ending relationships. (I kinda regret putting up with it)

Now that I am old enough to really appreciate what love can really be...I try to remember to be young enough to enjoy it. Fighting screws all that up.

I agree :D

I don't know how to fight. I can get resentful, I can get bitter, angry, sulking, weeping, pouting, I can slam the door and go for a long bicycle ride (since I sold my last car), or take a long subway ride from one end of town to the other. But I can't fight.

I can go to church, (but I don't), I can go see a movie, or lock myself in the washroom, or take the dog out or pack a suitcase and go home to mother for a few days, until she sees the error of her ways. But I don't fight, and I wish I did.

I've never learned how to fight. I can torpedo, I can backstab (rather poorly), I can throw knives, (always hit the wood with the handle portion), I can throw ashtrays, parties, tantrum, my cookies, but I can't fight.

I can withdraw, I can leave and never come back, I can leave and beg to come back, I can give silent treatment, the screaming at the top of my longs treatment, the sex treatment, I can talk to my mother and complain, but I can't, by george I can't, fight.

The opposite is also true, just like the above: not enough disagreements is the sign of too many disagreements.

Or also, just the right amount of disagreements brings tides of too many, too few, or just the right amount of disagreements down the rocky road of a given retricularly recifancterous relationship.

That was pretty f'n cool.

Pretty much my opposite but still...I can dig it.

I, however, can't. Can't dig it.

I was half a dozen years yonger than my closest sibling (altogether a baker's dozen years younger, if you count both siblings, in total). They did not abuse me; they loved me. I was the baby, everybody loved me, I was babied, spoiled.

So if I wanted something, I either got it, or not. There was no negotiations, ever, including fighting. I was smart enough to know to see that if I did not get something, that was so because there was no way of getting it for me by anyone in the family.

This made me a man of very, very poor negotiation skills.

I love playing Monopoly. It is a negotiations game at one point. I revel in doing something well which somethign I have never had practice in real life.

Fighting is a form of negotiation. An ugly, loud one, perhaps physical at times. But you can only fight if deep down you see the point in it. I don't. I have not learned that I can influence others to do things they don't want to do by fighting, by negotiating, by offering something of value in return.

I can get angry, very, very angry, and perhaps this is the reason for my frustration and ensuing anger: I have not got this important tool in my social tool box, and I get very frustrated when I need that tool, but it ain't in the box.

Sounds like you should probably get into a fight.

I just had a different upbringing bro. I am not the man to say your life is one way or another. You woulda turned out completely differently in my family.

(I am not even kidding when I tell you that, in my family...I am the sensitive emotional one)

As far as "Digging it"....consider taking the chance of mentaly stepping outside of your own shoes......I can make the leap to see things from your perspective Man. Consider seeing things from the angle of being dominant. (though in my family, I am the least dominant)

Just a thought.

I don't like the work "fight":

Definition of FIGHT
intransitive verb
1
a : to contend in battle or physical combat; especially : to strive to overcome a person by blows or weapons b : to engage in boxing
2
: to put forth a determined effort
transitive verb
1
a (1) : to contend against in or as if in battle or physical combat (2) : to box against in the ring b (1) : to attempt to prevent the success or effectiveness of <the company fought the takeover attempt> (2) : to oppose the passage or development of <fight a bill in Congress>
2
a : wage, carry on <fight a battle> b : to take part in (as a boxing match)
3
: to struggle to endure or surmount <fight a cold>
4
a : to gain by struggle <fights his way through> b : to resolve by struggle <fought out their differences in court>
5
a : to manage (a ship) in a battle or storm b : to cause to struggle or contend c : to manage in an unnecessarily rough or awkward manner


I like disagreement:

dis·agree·ment
noun \ˌdis-ə-ˈgrē-mənt\
1
: the act of disagreeing
2
a : the state of being at variance : disparity b : quarrel

my ex and I tried boxing gloves once.
I got a black eye......
she started laughin.....
we forgot what we were fightin about.

Only worked the one time tho....

as you can see....she is an....ex!!!

I have to laugh. My ex said something super sarcastic one day and I had one of those duster busters on a long stick things and I hit him with it. You can see why he's my ex husband. AND I filed on him. LOL.

I am not sure anyone wins a fight in a relationship. The idea of fighting doesn't seem to do anything but make a problem bigger with what ever means are used to fight; mean words, sulking, manipulation, ect..

A lot gets said about "Fair Fighting" but that just seems like renaming good commmunication and self preservation by good use of compromise and problem solving not fighting.

I believe most fighting comes from competiton not companionship. or compasshon for the partner so if you try to avoid the former and concentrate on the later you can usually resolve things.

People who fight all out usually win the battle but loose the war.

I'm really feeling your vibe, here, wux. I wasn't allowed to fight or disagree with one of my parents, so I just didn't. I get very panicky when emotions get intense, and I don't know what to do. Bleh. Everyone talks about the "fight" or "flight" response - what about "freeze"? That's where I spent a good deal of my time.

I believe that arguments and disagreements are inevitable not just romantically speaking but in any other relationships. However, it depends on how a person would handle it, or, in case you are a couple, how the two of you would try to resolve it.