Sorry, just had to get that off of my chest...thanks for allowing me to vent

Ahhhh, Mondays

as long as its not dancing bananas

Mondays with "the mother"

.

Not my mother...the scoop is, I have emergency custody of my grandson, who has been taken from my son's ex three times. She had a 15 day old baby that suffered from SIDS, and because she was too lazy to go get the apnea monitor, the baby died...strike one...my grandson was placed with my son for a year and then received a letter telling him to return my grandson to his mother or be charged and arrested. She then has her 9 month old taken from her by another ex-boyfriend's parents (still unknown why)...and proceeds to have two more children. A year later, her 2 year old son over doses on Oxycontin and the children are taken away again...strike two...and btw...she did have possession of this drug but it was not prescribed to her. This time, she failed to appear at a hearing and when they went to pick her up, it took the cops 45 minutes to wake her because she was crashed from a four day crack high. The baby was with someone, the five year old was roaming the disgustingly filthy house alone, and my grandson was wondering the streets in a pair of shorts and his 6 foot tall step-father's shoes, because he had none of his own. The kids had not eaten in days and had not been bathed in months, and no one knows how long it had been since they had clean clothing. All but two of her children are by different fathers, btw. She has been given the option of taking parenting and NA classes, getting a job, and a home and getting her kids back...or never get her kids back and facing possible charges of neglect, endangering and being under the influence. Since she got out of jail Sept 1st...she has done nothing but move from man to man, no attempt at doing what she is supposed to do...and is now PREGNANT again. We, the foster parents are required to take the kids to a supervised visit once a week, at which time the kids all kick and scream because they don't want to see her. The younger children even check with their foster parents each night, asking if they will be there to wake them up in the morning and if they will get food the next day. During these visits, she is never to mention to them that they may be going home with her...but does it every time. My grandson has stated emphatically, several times, that he does not want to see her and does not want to go back to her, saying "I don't know why they will make us 'cause she's just gonna mess up again." She received over $600 per month in a check, free medical for the kids and $700 in food stamps, and when she was arrested, there was not one drop of food in that house because she had sold the stamps for drugs. I feel that making these kids go see her is a punishment. What other case would make the victim come face to face with their offender on a weekly basis, when they don't want to be there? This is supposed to be in the best interest of the children?????? Sorry...I am just having trouble with this when she stands there and chews my grandson out for having Cs on his report card and starts spitting out orders at ME!!!!! He is now in therapy, and when I took him to the doctor, found out she had moved him around so much and not taken records with him that this poor kid has had all of his childhood vaccines 6 times!!!! So I ask, where does the stupidity end on the part of the justice system?

that's terrible
I will be praying for you and those kids.

Thank you very much....the hardest thing is seeing the way she treats him and then when he comes home he his hateful. He trashes his room, yells at me and destroys his toys,all because she mentions going home. It takes a good three days to get him back to normal, and he has gotten to the point of pretending to be ill so he doesn't have to go. I have been thinking about writing a letter to the judge but afraid it might do more harm than good.

I hate to say it but probably after another "accidental" death.

you're probably right about the letter. sometimes I wonder if anybody in the 'system' gives a crap about the kids. that judge should watch her and the kids together, without her knowing he's watching..

I keep telling the caseworker...my biggest fear is if they go back they will end up dead as children, or in prison as adults.

They have a caseworker in the room during the visits who is supposed to write down anything that is said or done, but seems I am the only one reporting things that he tells me on our way home.

that's what I'm saying....they don't care

They tell me that their job is to keep families together. This is not my idea of a family. Her three year old daughter was making motions of crushing something and then breathing it into her nose on her pinky one morning and told the fosters that she was "taking her medicine". My grandson has also told me of several occasions when his "mom" would leave him home to babysit so she could "get out for awhile" and on a couple of occasions made them sit in the car all night while she was inside our local casino. What poor child would want to go back to that?

I just pray that nothing bad happens to the kids while she's doped up .

I'm just praying she never has the opportunity to get them back. They are all settled into comfortable homes now and becoming healthy happy kids. My grandson couldn't sleep when he first moved in here because he was afraid someone would come and take him back to her. They have all adjusted very well to living with foster relatives and I think they should be given the opportunity to be normal kids for awhile. My grandson will be of age in 8 years and I would like nothing more than to see him be safe and happy and just be a kid.

I hope your prayer is answered