I guss that is the goal is to be single and happy or with someone and happy but my question is how do you get there

total agreement with sweetestgirl.....and personally former for me has always been better!!!!

answering ur statement Ipourchat.......u dun need to 'get there'.....any relation i life is good wen it already adds to wat u have....so find ur state of single and happy....den anything dat adds to it is great!! cheers!! :)

hi, iam interested in chatting , making frdsship and dating, if any1 interested pls reply

totally a perfect example of why I do not date that age range....his post explains it all for me

for him. it will to find that state, I think...

that is the question we share

and those ofus who have been here awhile ask it often

how DO u get there? first u must find someone who will accept u as u are

therein lies the hard part

I am single but certainly not lonely and I am very happy.

yanno navy I think this is where I get confused - I see u an singmesweet -both awesome - saying this about being alone and happy

I am alone but would prefer to be with a love partner- drinking him in and doing all the things love partners do

at the same time alone is better than "settling"

is that ehat u mean

I can't speak for singmesweet but I would rather not be with anyone other than friends. I tried the relationship thing and it doesn't work for me as honestly I have found relationships way too stressful and way too draining. I am set in my ways and I am a free spirit and being in a relationship would be too much like being in jail for me. I honestly do not miss being with a partner as I recall the grief, the sorrow, and the abuse I have suffered at their hands. Life is way to precious and short to live life being unhappy. I also have a busy life; this week alone I have been out every single night either with school, the military, or teaching music. I also dedicate my time to helping with charities, renos, and my hobbies. So, when I get home; I am exhausted and really don't have the strength to deal with the crap of being with someone; I like my alone time actually.

you bet there's a better option. at least two in fact. single and not lonely and obviously taken and happy. but then i guess we all see lonely differently. when i think of lonely, i think of vietnam. haven't felt lonely since. and taken? there's always just being happy and content together.

Definitely. I have found that part to be completely impossible.

Good ones...

Single and happy - many people remain single and happy, of these only those that chose to be lonely really remain lonely.

taken and happy - many remain taken and happy by knowing themselves, learning from past relationships, and knowing what they want, as well as, what they do not want.

You chose to be what you are.......sad, happy, lonely, ignored, lively, boring, etc.

Spot on!

So then the question is, how does one find a state of being single and happy. Not always easy, but it definitely can be done. And no, it doesn't mean "giving up" on love or anything like that. It just means attaining a better understanding of how you yourself tick, and learning how to accept yourself for who you are. Good self-esteem, basically.

The thing is, I'm happy with my life. I love where I love and have a great time with friends. I enjoy doing things in the area with friends and family. So, I am not sitting home, waiting around for someone to fall in love with me. I'm out enjoying life. I can't speak for others, so I don't know if they're doing the same, but yet are still unhappy.

It is good to be with someone who loves you.

It is better to depart if relationship is not sustainable.

It is best to live happily as & how we can.

In that position now. Soon to be lonely. Uncertainty sucks.

I've been married 3 times. 1st time I stayed in a miserable relationship 16 years for my kids sake. 2nd time, well I blew that one due to being an idiot. 3rd time, once again I stayed 15 years for the kids sake. Now I'm by myself and thinking things through, with some background to work with.

I miss/want someone to say "honey I'm home" or "how was your day". I want a leg message from someone who cares about me. I want to pour over all the possible birthday gifts I could buy her, and worry that I didn't get the right thing. I want to imagine someone smiling at me. I want to that breathless feeling. I want a lot of things that I'm never going to have, now that I'm alone. And I am alone.

single n miserable is the way to go