is good you understand that

It took me awhile, but I figured it out eventually....!

You are so right. It does depend on the person, but for the most part, most older guys I don't feel I get along with them. Some of their jokes and the things they want to do or don't want to do bother me also. There are things I want to enjoy in life and I feel someone who is too much older than me just won't understand my view points. And above all else, I just don't find them attractive. The wrinkles don't do it for me...

You are absolutely right but thats IF he is fun interesting, smart, good looking can still have a good time and treats me right. But I was speaking generally that is hard to find for me.

Haha! You tell them Girl!

Who do they think they are anyway?

Oh, well, matter settled. Let's move on :)

No it's alright. My intentions were to see 1) How many women would agree with me 2) If there were younger guys who took interest to my wants and needs that I was attracted to as well and 3) If there were indeed older men who have what I want and need and are attractive too. I just need stability I don't need anyone to be flaky with me nor play games. Im just tired of dealing with boys who live with mom and don't have their lives together. Im starting my first ever career soon and I have a son. I need someone who is going to do what he needs to do as a boyfriend and eventually a father and husband. That's all.

Exactly! It's like if you were always hit on by 95 year olds lol

Its like I said, I have a son and I know what it's like to have a dad come around every once in a while and a lot of the things I've learned growing up about boys, men and relationships in general, I had to learn on my own. My mom and dad had those 1-2 word answers when it came to my questions about boys. "Stay away from them" or "Dad, am I beautiful?" "You're normal" Like, what kind of answers are those? Even at a young age I was into younger guys but recently I've realized that they aren't going to cut it because they just aren't mature enough to give me what I need in my life. Boys need role models and I want my son to have someone to look up to in my life. But that doesn't mean I want just any guy. In my eyes, older men are great for teaching not only my son but myself great life lessons. I don't mind him being a little old fashioned but I want him and I to still be on somewhat of the same page. We both have to have things in common and sort of the same upbringings. I just feel these are some things I look for in a mate. And yes, marriage is very important to me. I can't do the shacking up thing because I feel we won't go anywhere as a couple (that's a different topic for a different forum) but please understand Im not trying to offend anyone, these are just my opinions.

You are beautiful!

well wat abt some 1 younger

If I may interject,

It is a sick game out there. In nature (THE REAL WORLD) most female animals especially the young ones seek out older males becasue they are "proven on the battlefield," and will pass on survivable characteristics (genetics).

Likewise I have seen a lot of women who say "I am not into older guys," suddenly under the arm of a guy who looks older than me. Why? Well, money is my usual guess.

Also I know a lot of younger women in my past who intentionally wanted an older sugar daddy and one classic example of this is Hugh Heffner. How old was his latest failed relationship partner? He is damn near fossilized. She was in that relationship to open doors for her career! Nothing MORE!

Now I have seen a lot of unconventional relationships that work. I know of marriages where she is older by more than 10 years and they are happy as it gets together. Good for the goose? Good for the gander.

Likewise I have had GFs younger and older than me. The most fun I have had was with much younger women. Likewise I have no kids of my own yet and don't want to add to someone's collection of kids from other relationships. I would rather have kids by a woman who has not had them yet. It has a LOT to do with sins of past relationships and kids just compound the mess. personally I would prefer to be involved with someone under 30 and I am 45. But one thing, I sure don't LOOK like I am 45 and this opinion is from a lot of other people. I only have a touch of Gray going on. So why should I settle for anything less than what I want too?

Having older guys hitting on you means you are hot or at least distinct among others. Then again old dogs will still sniff up under any raised tail (dog school!). Still, you should not take it hard if older guys are hitting you up. All you have to do is say no!

Like I heard it said, Hate the game, Don't Hate the Player!

I lost a friend of mine and he was 42, (and I mean he said "OW. I HAVE A BAD HEADACHE!" Fell to the floor and he DIED!) If anything I learned something from his passing in that life is too short for the bullshitte we are taught. You could run across an older guy who gets you very humid south of your equator. Then again one day you might wind up being the Cougar we all hear about on these threads. Just find what makes you happy and stick to it and try to be polite until they don't take no for an answer. Besides, what is wrong with making friends that are older than yourself? Just becasue a guy hits you up don't mean you got to be like ice towards them unless they are rabid perverts!

Trust me, you don't want to live a miserable life just becasue of fake morality. If older guys don't float your boat I say to you becasue you know what you don't want!

I want to find someone who I can float her boat and likewise she floats mine! Till then life sucks. We can't always get what we want but it sure helps to know WHAT you want in the first place!

So party on and continue playing the game!



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This message brought to you by the National Committee of Dirty Old Men and the Jerry Springer Show!



And National Public Broadcasting.

LOL thanks for that I really enjoyed reading it. Im so sorry about your friend and you are right life is short. Im not ruling out ALL older men just that is my preference but you are right I never know what may happen if I do give it a try but I have to be attracted to them first. I mean all we have are our eyes when we first meet/see someone and we have to be attracted to them first before we think about talking to them (or is that just me?).

Not really anymore. That's just about what I've been with since I was about 18 years old. Im going to be 26 this year and I've only been with one guy who was older than me but only by 4 years. To me, young guys just want to ****, to be blunt about it. Been there done that moving on to the next level. You got to have me intellectually, physically, and spiritually. It's got to be deeper otherwise you either will find somebody else or I will. Its the inside that keeps anyone interested for the long term.

Thank you

I am mildly amused by all of your opinions. May as well give a few of my own

There are 16 years between my mother and father.

My Mum was 23, and my Dad was 39 when they met.

My Mum married him for the money. My Dad, well, he was just desperate, and stupid.

They hate each others guts. They argue and fight all the time. My Mums the modern Girl, and he's the old anchor (anchor head).

My mum sleeps with other people, because my father makes her skin crawl. My father has moved out the house back to his mothers, because he can't stand her, me, or my brother.

He comes home for dinner and then leaves. My mum cries every night, untill midnight, due to her extreme lonleyness.

The age gap between them, has destroyed the family.

I pity them both. That is all.

To be honest, I don't think it was an age gap more than it was just difference of opinion and lack of a real reason to get married. I would never marry for materialistic things because these are things I can get for myself. Im ad adult so I have my own career and I am going to have my own place to live and pay my own bills. Maybe if they found love in one another before they decided to get married it wouldn't be a bad marriage.

My mum was looked down upon by him, and his whole family, for being modern. All the things she had, and all the things she did. They were sickly jealous of her.

Because she was young they considered her to be brainless, and took advantage of her. And because she was so young, she didn't know they were doing this, so she let them. She would end up in hospital many times, because they made her do endless work. They stoped her from seeing her friends, they stoped her from going out. They made her a house slave. And kicked in with all the orders.

They were so cruel to her, that she had to get psycriatic help for many years to recover from all the abuse.

She was subject to just as much abuse, as a young girl. Her mother and father would bully her and her sisters. The only man she ever loved is dead.

She has recovered from all the abuse. And does not have much to show for it. I too am ruined from it. Oh, well :(

That's totally cool.Thanks for responding and sorry for messing up the spelling on your name. I'm kinda new at this.

Update: A guy in my age range, was attractive too...but said I "don't have a body pic.." LMAO What? I see what you want. Good and I won't post one so I can separate the good guys from the losers. That's all I've been getting anyway. Men who just want ***. Please! Keep it movin!

This is a common misunderstanding between men and women. When she seems to flip flop quickly on an issue, she's not changing her mind. She's changing her mood.