To all those I have hurt.........

I never claimed i was perfect
some went as far, as to say I'm worthless
I know my words cannot reverse this
my apology, is probably as worthless as these verses
so i feel I must be assertive, as a wordsmith
my heart is as big as this earth is
If you need the shirt off my back, I'd gladly go shirtless
your hate is nowhere as intense as this hurt is
and i know i probably deserve this
this is why i purchase
the substances that i purchase
all the pain that i have caused isn't worth it
there is entirely too much hurt in it
from the lies, to the hurtful words sent
I can't honestly say they weren't meant
but i can say my intent
is not to circumvent
and it's not an attempt to mis-represent
or offend by dissent
I am simply discontent
so in turn, I act out with contempt
as an attempt to preempt your contempt
is any of this making sense?

do unto others, before they do unto you
the things that have been done to me
are the things i have done to you
unfortunately, this fact is sad but true
i am in no way mad at you
for being mad at me, for doing bad to you
but i felt i did, what i had to do
to prove, the things i had to prove
you always have to win, so people like me lose
it may be a shock, but people like me too
for doing the things, that people like me do
cause surviving, is something i like to do
but, the people that like me too, try to fight me too
so i automatically assume
your gonna try and fight me too
if its something my friends are trying to do
why shouldn't i assume, your gonna try it too?
am i at all getting through?

my last girlfriend tore out my heart
and i completely fell apart
so now I'm too timid to start
to show my new girl my heart
as an attempt to outsmart
and thwart any future attempt to break my heart
i consider it a safeguard
I've got it down to an art

nothing can hurt me
If I refuse to let it
now are you starting to get it?

We always build up walls to protect us, but that fault of that is we are never truly able to get close to anyone. and sometimes that is not always a bad thing. i really like this one a lot. great job.

Everytime I read your writings I sense fear, anger, & pain. Fear of the future, anger at the past, & too much pain to move forward. Maybe it's time to let it all go if you really want to move forward in life. All that held me back for years & caused me to make many mistakes in relationships that just couldn't work because I wouldn't let them. Seriously if you ever want to talk as friends email me.