I once shot a weiner dog in the azz with a bb gun while he was humping my schnauzer.......

I wanted to share these with the stoners. kc0003 shared these..........

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.

-Groucho Marx


I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

-Groucho Marx


I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it.

-Groucho Marx

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?

-Groucho Marx


One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know.

-Groucho Marx


Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

-Groucho Marx

(you missed some and i'm thowing in a few more for ya just for ordering before black friday)

While shooting elephants in Africa, I found the tusks very difficult to remove. But in Alabama, the Tuscaloosa...

A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere. A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.

Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know.

Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.

Go, and never darken my towels again.

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.

I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

I read in the newspapers they are going to have 30 minutes of intellectual stuff on television every Monday from 7:30 to 8. to educate America. They couldn't educate America if they started at 6:30.

From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend reading it.

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower.

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

I don't have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They're upstairs in my socks.

I married your mother because I wanted children, imagine my disappointment when you came along.

I've known and respected your husband for many years, and what's good enough for him is good enough for me.

Oh are you from Wales ?? Do you know a fella named Jonah ?? He used to live in whales for a while.

We took pictures of the native girls, but they weren't developed. . . But we're going back next year

Will you marry me? Do you have any money? Answer the second question first

Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.

(got to love Groucho!)

Thanks bro.......

I would never join a club that would have me as a member.

morning stoners!

Awwwwwwwwww, cute :-)

Morning!
That's funny chit KC, thanks for posting JW.

"Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot."

Stoners!

hahaha poor lil Turkey
Hello John!

Looks more like a chicken...or maybe a duck..but then again, what the f...

Enjoy:

You could be correct

row, you must have thanksgiving on your mind

higha stoners!!

Haha I guess so! Mmmmm turkey and stuffing.
High bastet

this time next week we will be in stoner food heaven!!

oooo, thanks for the keeper...got this one?



Is it 4:20 yet? I am sure it is always 4:20 somewhere...even if it's on another planet.

it was just 2:40 here, kinda 420 sidewayzzzz

Oooo pretty....

Gas station dude is cool in my books.

Groovy man.........

Would have been cooler but some guy showed up asking a bunch of questions...made me and gas station dude scream 'narc!'